Johdi lay in the small cave.  Long ago,
something had carved a small hole into the side of
a bluff near his father's holding.  More recently
than that, someone had covered the inside with rugs
and blankets.  The place had obviously been
abandoned for years.  Piles of dust had gathered on
everything, and many of the rugs had started to
mildew and rot.  However, from the first moment he
saw it, the place became special to him, for at
times like now he had a place to go where he could
let out all that he felt.

     The screams of his sisters as the first wife
disciplined them.  The screams of his father's many
wives as they where disciplined.  His own screams
as the boys of neighboring families picked on him
and made fun of him.  Then more when his father
berated him for not standing up to them.  Although
with his short stature and slight build, he
couldn't defend himself from the assaults of the
older children.  The younger children where another
matter, for he had learned well from his tormenters
how to keep the neighbor children in line.  None of
them would ever get in his way.  Most even refused
to even look at him, but their screams came back to
haunt him at these quiet times in his personal
refuge.
     The older boys hadn't been any worst to him
today than they had been every day in the past, but
that hadn't stopped him from being especially cruel
to one of the younger boys.  The burn would heal
over time, but the screams of the boy as he touched
the fire poker to the little's arm.  Those memories
where especially hard on him right now.  His father
didn't even punish him.  He all but congratulated
young Johdi on how he'd punished the boy for
dropping his eggs while walking back from the
chicken coop.  The boy deserved what he got.  He
shouldn't have been playing around trying to juggle
them like one of the performers from last midsummer
festival's fair.
     Johdi sat, quietly rocking himself.  Why did
he have to be the one to punish the boy?  Why
couldn't one of the other boys have handled the
little?  Why wasn't the little's brother there to
discipline him?  Why couldn't he forget what he had
done as the older boys did so easily?  Johdi sat
alone and pensive for a long time, until he saw the
shadow of a branch from the tree outside cross a
mark he had made on a rock to remind him when
dinner would be served.  He got all of his chores
done before mid-morning like he always did, but he
would still be missed if he didn't show up for
dinner.  So he gathered his stuff and set out after
placing the woven mats of rushes over the entrance.
The cave was blocked from direct view by a large
bushy tree, but providing extra camouflage was a
good idea.  He didn't even have to make it.  He had
found the mats by the side of the cave.
Apparently, the previous owner had left in a hurry.
     When he arrived back home he was welcomed back
by the smells of a hearty dinner and the cowed
faces of his sisters, his MANY sisters.  His father
had tried for many years to produce a son.  He had
gone through many women in the attempt too.
Several of his underwives had died in childbirth,
after being forced to bear too many children in too
short of time and at too young an age.  Sadly, that
wasn't uncommon to holderkin.  His father's first
wife had failed to produce a son after years of
trying.  His under wives had all born him nothing
but girls.  The first wife had born him nothing.
This was Johdi's father's biggest grievance against
his wives, and he treated them cruelly for it, all
but one.  For thirteen years ago, she had shared
his bed for the first time and on that first night
had conceived him a son.  For this, she was held in
the highest regard.  She was his first wife in all
but title, and the boy she bore, his father named
Johdi.  Jodie was his father's pride and joy.  For
after all the years of trying, all the pain and
loss, he had his son, his only son.  He taught his
son everything he knew; how to plow a field, sow
the grain, and harvest it, but most of all, how to
treat your wives.  He had much practice at this,
for on his tenth birthday, having reached the age
of maturity, it fell under him to assist in the
discipline of the holding.  He had learned well,
and, within one turn of the moon, even the oldest
had learned to respect his authority.
     Many of his sisters where unwed, as his father
had had so many in the attempt to create himself a
son, that he did not have the will or the ability
to give them all a decent dowry.  His eldest unwed
sister was approaching her 18th year.  It was
almost unheard of for daughters to be so old and
without husband.  Unless they took vows to serve
the goddess.  That kind of life, on the other hand,
was hardly an easy escape.  A girl who took vows
would scarcely see the sun again.  Although
sometimes, while he was beating one of them, he
would wonder why more of them didn't make the
choice to leave.  To escape their fathers,
brothers, and the certainty of harshness from their
husbands.  However, it was the nature of women to
serve their husbands, and to take all the abuse
that came with it.  Just as it was a man's nature
to defend his holding, to assure the discipline and
the survival of everyone in it.
     Johdi walked to the table and sat down,
waiting for his sisters to serve him.  With a smile
his sister June walked over.  She was, to Johdi,
the most beautiful of his sisters.  Hardly more
than a year older than him and every bit of her
begged the male eye to take her away and marry her.
Johdi has spent many nights dreaming about her, and
he had always thought that his wife would have to
be someone like her.  So agreeable.  So eager to
please.  She always looked so honest and innocent
that he could never bear to flog her.  On the few
occasions when it was unavoidable, he had taken her
to a back room and slapped two belts together while
she made cries of pain.  Then they would give each
other a nod and with her face hidden in her hands
and tears streaming from her eyes she'd run to her
room (that was shared with several other girls of
course) and hide her face in a pillow until
everyone had gone back to normal.  For this, she
had been generous to him, baking his little extras
or knitting him an extra sweater or fashioning
other gifts for him in what little free time she
had.  Which is why when she slipped him a small
piece of birch bark with some writing on it, he was
overjoyed.  What had she prepared for him this
time?  He covertly glanced at the note.  It was
instructions to meet him out on the other side of
the fields after everyone has gone to sleep.  His
eagerness overwhelming him, he couldn't wait until
that night.  Not long after this exchange his
father walked into the house, sweaty and muddy from
working out in the fields.  He washed the worst of
this off and with a kiss from several of his wives,
sat himself at the head of the table.  His first
wife soon joined him sitting on his right and
Johdi's mother a little latter sat at his left.
     The meal was eaten in silence after brief
prayer giving thanks to the god and goddess.  It
was nourishing yet mostly unremarkable dinner until
about a dozen of his sisters had finished and were
waiting to be dismissed.  Then Johdi's father stood
up and gathered everyone's attention.  Then in a
loud booming voice addressed his family, "As I'm
sure you all know, Johdi has reached his 13th year,
and it's time for him to start thinking about
starting his own holding and being able to provide
for them and defend them.  As such, I have decided
that he warrants special attention in the latter.
So, I, after consulting my wives, have decided to
send him for training in the use of arms in the
hopes that one day he will be fit to take his place
in defending the holdings."
     Knew his father had a point.  He was not as
strong or large as the other boys his age.  During
the recent games of 'Heralds and Karsites' the
other kids had taken to making him play a Bard.
Every boy dreamed of becoming a Herald, one of `the
queen's arrows', and the magical protectors of
Valdemar, but being a herald is not something
anyone can become through any means of their own.
For no one chooses to be a herald but are Chosen.
They are chosen by their companions, magical beings
that are more than the mere horses they appear to
be.  Once Chosen, they are taken to the palace
where they learn magic and combat to aid in the
defending of Valdemar from their enemies.  Not that
there are too many of those since Ancar, the evil
king who ruled a land to the east, was defeated and
the strange 'mage storms' stopped.
     His father resumed his speech, "So, tomorrow
Johdi shall leave to study with the best sword
master in the land until he is old enough to marry
and start a holding of his own.  However if he
excels in his studies he may be accepted into the
Guard.  In that case, I shall give to all my
daughters an adequate dowry with the help of his
first year's pay.  And you shall all be wed and out
of my house by the next planting."
     With that he looked Johdi straight in the eye
saying, "I hope you realize what a huge favor this
sword master is doing for you.  He usually charges
a hefty tuition for his classes, but he happens to
be an old friend of mine, but he took you on as a
personal favor to me.  So you'd better study hard
and do me proud, or you'll be back here tasting my
belt before you can blink.  Do you hear me?"
     "Yes, sir" was Johdi's curt response, but he
couldn't help feel smothered under the pressure his
father was putting on him.  He began silently
praying to the Father that he will fulfill his
father's hopes for him.  He continued this as he
walked to his room one he had been dismissed from
the table.  He lay in bed pondering the change his
life was about to take, when he suddenly became
aware of the silence coming from the rest of the
house and the note in his hand.  His sister was
waiting for him.  He silently peeked out the door
and saw everyone had gone to their beds some time
ago.  Being his father's only son he had a room to
his self for as long as he could remember.  That
made sneaking out at times like this especially
easy for any time his friends went out to do their
juvenile pranks.  In this instance, as with many
others, he had no difficulty getting out of the
house without waking anyone.
     Soon he was running through a field with the
barest sliver of an old moon to light his way.  He
reached his destination and slowed looking for a
silhouette of the girl he had come here to see.
Finally, he saw her come out from behind a storage
shed.  She had a bundle in her hands.  Without
thinking, he called out to her, "June, over here."
:Of course she saw me... that's why she stepped out
towards me.  Havens above, I'm so stupid,: he
thought to himself.
     However, June only smiled and spoke, "I'm so
happy you came.  I've been working on this for you
for forever.  It was so hard to keep any of he
wives from seeing it.  Now I can finally see you
try it on.  I've been waiting for this moment for
moons.  When I first overheard the wives talking
about you getting sent away I was scared it
wouldn't be done in time, but it seems I got it
done just in time.  Here try it on.  I hope it
fits."
     He unfolded the cloth a little surprised by
how much cloth there was in it.  :She must have
made me a whole outfit.  Wow... so I'll have
something extra sharp looking when I show up at my
new school.:  these hopes where all ground to dust
as the cloth fell open and he was able to make out
what it looked like in the dim light.
     "I CAN'T WEAR THIS!  IT'S A DRESS!"  Johdi
yelled entirely too loud.
     "Shh!  Quiet!  You want is to get us in
trouble?"  June half-yelled half whispered.  "Do
you not like it?  I made it special just for you.
I'm sure it will fit.  You shouldn't have any
trouble getting into it, and I won't lace the
bodice too tight, I know you aren't used to wearing
them."
     In a softer but no less angered voice he
replied, "It's not a matter of whether it fits or
not, I'm a BOY I can't wear this.  It would mean
the switch for sure.  In fact I should give you my
belt right now for even suggesting I wear something
like this"
     He threw it to the ground and June collapsed
and started weeping.  "I just wanted to see what
you'd look like.  I was just being nice.  I thought
you'd look pretty."  All thoughts of hitting her
left him and he felt ill.  What had he done to her?
He turned around to run back to the house and
closed his eyes.  He saw several dark figures
blocking his path.  They all looked angry.  They
where his sisters, most of his sisters, about two
dozen of them.
     He felt very small at that moment as the
eldest in attendance spoke.  "Why'd you do a thing
like that?  I thought you liked her, I thought you
two liked each other.  That's why she was spared
while we all got the rod.  No...  You're trying on
that dress.  You may be leaving tomorrow, but
tonight you're one of use, and we're going to give
you some of your own medicine."  His sisters
hovered over him.  As the first of them grabbed his
shirt to tear it off of him, he opened his eyes.
June was in front of him crying.  His daydream
gone, he went over to the dress he'd thrown down.
Picked it up and neatly folded it.  I'm sorry.
It's really pretty.  I know it must have taken you
a lot time, but I can't wear something like that
and you know it.  It's unseemly.  It's unseemly for
you to even ask."
     He pet her head once and slowly walked back to
the house.  "All I wanted was to be able to be with
you, with us being at the same level.  With out you
having to worry about being what our father wants
you to be."  He felt horrible.  He could tell it
meant a lot to her.  He knew that she must have put
a lot of work into this, but he couldn't do what
she was asking.  It was wrong.  It's unnatural.
No...  He did the right thing he decided.  No
matter how much it hurt she was wrong for even
asking such a thing of him.  There was very little
he wouldn't have done for June, but this was one.
     He crept back into the house then to bed and
slept restlessly.  The next day, after a rushed
breakfast, he began the long journey to his new
school.