-INEBRIATION-
I don't remember the words to this song
But i'll keep on singing, don't care if i'm wrong
Why don't you all join in with me?
I'm so smashed I can't even see
i know I sound really bad in this verse
But if Chippa was singing it'd sound worse
Get that fool drunk then you'l see
Its not so bad putting up with me
I think there's some hesitation
I know now to drink in moderation
So i'm never going to drink again
At least not untill next weekend
-LIONS, TIGERS AND MEREKATS-
I want to see dig
But it looks like a meerkat to me
Turn on channel seven
But its all censored for me
Lions and tigers and bears oh my
Looks like a meerkat to me
Table 1 sucks penis and wang
Its true you see
Theres a secret room here and its kinda freaky
Alf is drinkin red cordial
And threw it up because of me
The elephants drinking blood
But it looks like OJ to me
-I CAN'T BELIEVE WE GOT ANOTHER GIG-
Here we are again, playing another show
What were doing here i dont know
It sure is a mystery to me
I hope you all got in for free coz...
I cant believe we got another gig
Dunno what this place was thinkin
But im sure they were all drinkin
For your sake i hope youve been too
Otherwise i feel sorry for you
-SELF INFLICTED AMNESIA-
We'll drink it if its green
We'll drink it if is blue
We'll drink it all
How about you?
Drinks to the left of me, drinks to the right
We'll drink it all, and we won't remember this tomorrow night
Its all right
We wont remember this tomorrow night
Take some guaro, some bundy rum, some Cptn Morgans
Now we're having fun
Theres something missing, it needs something more
Grab that canola oil, thats what we're looking for
-MR CANNYMAN-
Here we are with a brand new Doozers song
It was written by Mr Cannyman
What is the name of this Doozers song?
well im glad you asked ... its Mr Cannyman
He is the Canman, he is made of cans
What is he made of? well hes made of cans
What is he doing? Does he have any plans?
Only to rock out in our very own band
Is the can man really made of cans?
Na nanananananan....
Went down to the pizza store
Went walking right through that door
Pizza girl was looking mighty fine
Had to say what was on my mind
So I said, I said
I'de buy that for a dollar
She asked me do I want anchovies?
I said no what the fuck would I want anchovies for
and she said would I like capsicum, capsicum then
I said i wont buy that for 3 dollars, i want buy it for 2 dollars
But you know what i will buy it for!!
-CHEAP SCOTCH-
Went down to the bottle'o
Check your funds your running low
There'l be nothing high class tonight
But don't worry it'l be alright
Cheap scotch yeah yeah
You know you will regret it
But you never will forget it
Tomorrow you'l want to die
But tonight you'l have the time of your life
-EL SALSIBAR-
Elsalzibar
He's got a big car
Where did he get the money?
You don't wanna know about it, honey
He is my little friend
Passed out on the beach again
Thinks he's had a bottle but he's really had seven
El salzibar
Thinks he's from Australia
But he's really a drug lord from Mexico
What the hell would he know
CHILD STAR SYNDROME-
I'm not so cute no more
Now i'm just scary
Taken so many drugs
That I can barely see
People used to recognise me from afar
Now they just laugh at me passed out at the bar
'Cause i've got child star syndrome
There's no groupies knocking at my door
And nobody wants me for cameos anymore
And if i could id say for you my old catchphrase
But im too busy sticking needles in my veins
Better believe its a serious condition
It affects more child actors than malnutrition
Fred Savage and the Olsen twins will tell you the same
And River Phoenix too, if that speedball hadnt killed his brain
-NEVER DRINKING AGAIN UNTIL NEXT WEEKEND-
Well its the morning after and youve got the blues
Last night you threw up on your girlfriends shoes
And you lost the keys to your car
And your face is covered in tiny scars
So youre never drinking again
At least not until next weekend
And you hit on your girlfriends very best friend
Who is really a man, but you didnt realise that then
And you ran around the bar with no pants
Shouting out to everyone "I'm the monkey queen of France"
-FREDDO-
Hey that's my freddo ...
*All verses are subject to change*
