Beyond "No, Mister": Useful English Phrases for Iraqi POWs

On May 1, the UK's Daily Mirror printed an article which detailed the torture and possible murder of a young Iraqi by British soldiers. Whether the victim survived is not known, as, near death, he was dumped off the back of a truck. His crime, looting. The only English words he could muster up in his defense were "No, mister." In the spirit of international communication, and assuming it was a misunderstanding on the part of well-intentioned peacekeepers intent on bringing order to a troubled land, we offer the following polite English expressions for other Iraqi prisoners wishing to communicate more fluently with their captors in the international language of freedom and democracy.

Pardon me, but could you not put that hood over my head, please?
Please stop punching me in the face.
Would you kindly refrain from kicking me in the ribs and stomach?
Please be so kind as to untie my wrists, as I have lost the sensation in my hands.
Excuse me, I seem to be bleeding on the inside of my hood.
Would you please stop punching and kicking me?
Terribly sorry, but would you please not rip my shirt?
Would you please keep the barrel of your rifle out of my mouth?
I'd very much appreciate it if you would not urinate on me.
Dreadfully sorry, but I am vomiting, some of my teeth have fallen out, and my jaw is disclocated.
Would it be very much trouble for you to cease hitting me in the groin with the butt of your rifle?
Would you please be so kind as to ask the leaders of your country to bring their troops home?

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/allnews/tm_objectid=14199634&method=full&siteid=501 43&headline=shame-of-abuse-by-brit-troops-name_page.html