The Buterbaugh Family Photo Album

Prepared as an assignment for 11th grade by Gary L. Buterbaugh

This is my younger brother, Tom.   Mom said he got all the good looks and no brains.   He loves being a babe hound.   Girls make spit roll down his chin.

This is my mom.   She has lots of boyfriends.   One of them even has a job.

My grandmom (Daddy's mom) lives with us in our trailer.   She smells real bad.   She likes to hang out in bars and drink beer.

Here is my Uncle Jimmie-Joe-Roy-Bob and his lovely wife Nancy.   Nancy is pregnant with their 12th child.   This may be their last kid, because I think Nancy has figured out what causes that, now, and has stopped sleeping in the same bed as the dog.

My mother's parents are dead, so I cannot include any photos of them.   But here is a picture of their grave at the cemetary.   I guess this would be a good time to comment on something my classmates say to me almost every day.   I am NOT really a Dumfart.   But I should also say that I am very proud to have so many Dumfarts in my family.

My mom says she is almost positive this is my dad.   He lives in a Federal Penitentiary in New Jersey.   When he gets out in 55 years we are going to go fishing.

This is my dads truck.   The blood stains inside are almost all gone.

My younger sister Jill lost all her teeth.   She was licking a egg beater after mom made a cake and my cousin Jimmy turned it on by accident.

We are proud of my older brother Barney.   He is only 22 and is in the 10th grade.   He wants to be a lawyer.

My half brother JimBob and his wife.   She is a hottie.   They raise Possum in their back yard.   They are not allowed to have children.

This is my older sister Sue Ellen.   She has 15 kids and they all look different.   We depend on her welfare check to get by.   She has a disease that makes her itch.

Here are some of the Buterbaugh kids at the last family reunion.   Ain't we purdy?   I am the babe-magnet in the first row, second chair from the right.

Jethro is my 1st cousin.   He runs a tomato stand down by the highway.

This is Michael.   He used to be my best friend.   Unfortunately, he got killed by a bus on the highway.

These are 2 kids we throw stuff at.   There used to be 3 of them.   Mom says we can't throw heavy stuff no more.

Jake holds the park record.   He once jumped over 7 trailers.   Jake crashed alot and talks real slow now.   His doctor told him to wear a helmit.

This is my Uncle Marky.   He sells perfume in a department store and my mom says if I study real hard in school I can become just like him.

THE END

I hope you know the Buterbaugh family better now!