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DBA


BUREAU CONSTITUTION
Amendend 01/15/05

The DOMESTIC BUREAU of ANGER official constitution (as of 01/11/05)
ARTICLE I We, the angry people, grant upon ourselves the power and soverignty to do anything we want, anywhere we want, which is currently* exclusive to the State of Maryland, The State of South Dakota, The State of Iowa, The State of Minnesota, The State of Nebraska, The State of California, The State of Florida, The State of Ohio, The Commonwealth of Virginia, and the People's Republic of Mexico. This is primarily applicable to various types of mayhem, including justifyable, injustifyable, reasonable and infantile, and may be, at any time, augmented by any form of chaos, in any situation that such acts are applicable, necessary or desired. Such actions are to be considered the primary mission of this institution.

*(12/13/02)

SECTION 1.1 That includes almost anything that has to do with seagulls and pigeons in the State of Maryland and the Commonwealth of Virginia.

Amended 01/15/05:

Jurisdiction has been extended to the aforementioned soverign states in ARTICLE I.

ARTICLE II The internal structure of the Bureau shall be as follows: A position in which all power, real or imagined, shall be vested, known as the Fearless Leader (aka Director), who shall preside over subordinate real or imagined minions, known as the following, in ranks respectively decending: a single Deputy Fearless Leader (Deputy Director), and an Assistant Fearless Leader (Assistant Director) for the Bureau at large, who will preside over a Special Agent in Charge (Or Section Chief/ Station Chief) of each and every Field Office established and in active operation. There shall be in any of the numerous Field Offices, those specially qualified for whatever of the numerous field divisions they are explicitly and individually assigned, those directly involved in and responsible for executing missions, known as Special Agents. The Fearless Leader may act in the office of Special Agent in Charge, or in any of the offices beneath him or her, appoint promotions, both temporary and permanent, appoint replacements, both temporary or permanent, and all offices of the Fearless Leader (Director) and all senior Special Agents of their respective devisions comprise the Senior Staff, and may be present at Senior Staff meetings, whenever and wherever held, as requested or deemed necessary by the Fearless Leader or anyone from that office, for mission-specific reasons.

Amended 01/15/05:

The structure has extended throughout the various divisions of the DBA, extending among the various Field Offices, as deemed necessary by the Director.

SECTION 2.1 That includes almost anyone and anywhere that has to do with seagulls and pigeons in the State of Maryland and the Commonwealth of Virginia.

Amended 01/15/05: As before, extended to new jurisdictions of the DBA.

SECTION 2.2 (ammended 5/28) (stricken 1/15/05) Most important rule about DBA: Do not talk about DBA. 1