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Snarf found frozen in carbonite in Temple of Doom |
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Radioactive Desert Lemers attacked me, and now, I'm a mutant! |
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Clown has his entire body covered in gold, and then sells it! |
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Following in the wake of the legendary Indiana Jones, explorers stumbled upon Osbert Snarf (the lesser-known Thundera and protector of Lion-O) frozen in Carbonite. The rock solid tomb was found deep in the heart of the Temple, in the Shamans chamber. The Explorers have recovered snarf, and are trying to figure out the combination to the lock. Once freed, Snarf will undergo research and tests, so they can further study the Lesser Thunderas. Other explorers are scouring the rest of the temple for other artifacts and treasures. |
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Groom Lake, Arizona - Outside the top secret military installation known as Area 51, an explorer spotted a strange glowing creature perched on a cactus. "It was unlike anything I have ever seen." says Jim Forrester, a Arizona resident. "The thing was poised to strike, but I never thought it was after me." Forrester described the creature as a glowing desert lemer. "Since the attack, I have had the urge to climb on furniture and snarl at my wife and children." These new lemers are considered extremely dangerous. If you are seen by a Desert Lemer, run for your life! |
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New York City, NY - Donko the clown was known for his loving kindness for children, and his fabulous parties. Recently Donko has fallen in love with gold and decided what better way to enjoy it, than to have his entire body covered in gold. Donko was smothered in molten-hot liquid gold up to his head, which then was carefully sculpted over as to not cover his mouth and eyes. Donko sold himself on Ebay for 31 million dollars. "I just love gold so much, I figured what better way to enjoy it than to be smothered, covered, and plasted in my new found love." Donko now belongs to The San Diego Museum. |
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