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SONG CHALLENGE WINNER!
The Song Challenge: Who Left Uncle Harry In The Bushes? July 6, 2000 - Fort Worth, Texas: Maintenance worker John Truex was minding his own business as he walked the grounds of the Woodhill Apartments on Monday, when he spied an odd-looking wooden box under a bush. "He had no idea what it was," said the manager of the complex. "It looked like a little coffin." Truex took the box to the apartment office to show the manager and other staff members what he found. Curious, the group opened the lid and discovered a sealed brass box inside. They couldn't open the brass box, and couldn't figure out what it was, so they called the police. Office r
W.T. Byrnes arrived at the scene and was just as stumped by the 1-foot-long by 4-inch-wide box, which seemed to be missing a display plate. "I wasn't real sure what it was," Byrnes said. "I called funeral homes in the area and they said, 'Yes, we package things like that,' and I said,
'Eeeeyew!'" "According to a couple of funeral homes," continued Officer Byrnes, "they take ashes, put them in a plastic bag with a label of who it is and then put them in a box that they seal up and then put in a display case." Byrnes turned the little box over to the Medical Examiner's Office; however, the staff members there declined to comment yesterday. The statement from spokeswoman Linda Anderson was, "As it stands right now, we don't have any information on it -- All we have is a box." But the apartment manager has heard otherwise. "It's an urn of some sort," she said. "The medical examiner's office found out that it is a lady from Granbury, but they haven't contacted any relatives. But I'm sure when a person finds out that their relative was left here, we will be hearing from them . . . (but) you've got to wonder who would leave Uncle Harry under a bush . . . .".
Uncle Harry's Box by MMario
Chorus:
Farewell to your Harps and Angels,
Farewell to the Pearly Gates
Farewell to your clouds and choruses,
St. Peter will have to wait!
For good old Uncle Harry, is lying 'neath the bush
And the truth be told, since we have his gold
We threw his ashes away
I was on my way to work one day, when what should catch my eye
But a little wooden coffin, that in the garden lies
Beneath the hedge of boxwood, I never thought I'd spy
Uncle Harry's box, which we bought in a shop, on the very day he died
Chorus
My brother he first took the gruesome burden on himself
To keep old Harry's ashes, upon the mantle shelf
But his wife object greatly, and demanded he give I
Uncle Harry's box, which we bought in a shop, on the very day he died
Chorus
And so I put the funeral urn, with ashes all inside
Into the upstairs closet, and shut it out of mind
Until the burglars took it, God knows what they thought to find!
Uncle Harry's box, which we bought in a shop, on the very day he died
Chorus
They took the engraved name plate and the photo from the lid
And left the box beneath the bush, thinking it was hid
Too bad they never looked inside, the lid off never pried
(of) Uncle Harry's box, which we bought in a shop, on the very day he died
Chorus
The box we have recovered, once more it's safe and sound
And all the precious contents, we've taken out and handed 'round
Oh, no they were not ashes, but stocks and bonds inside
Uncle Harry's box, which we bought in a shop, on the very day he died
Chorus