SONG CHALLENGE WINNER!

The Song Challenge:   This Challenge! idea comes from our wonderful MMario. For some strange reason, this story kinda reminds me of the (seemingly neverending) presidential election. ;-) So, buys your tickets and takes your chances, Challenge!rs . . . We're going -- Freaky Frog Gigging . . . [Arkansas Democrat Gazette] -- Two local men were seriously injured when their pickup truck left the road and struck a tree near Cotton Patch on State Highway 38 early Monday morning. Woodruff County Deputy Dovey Snyder reported the accident shortly after midnight Monday.  Thurston Poole, 33, of Des Arc and Billy Ray Wallis, 38, of Little Rock are listed in serious condition at Baptist Medical Center. The accident occurred as the two men were returning to Des Arc after a frog-gigging trip. On an overcast Sunday night, Poole's pick-up truck headlights malfunctioned. The two men concluded that the headlight fuse on the older model truck had burned out.  As a replacement fuse was not available, Wallis noticed that the .22 caliber bullet from his pistol fit perfectly into the fuse box next to the steering wheel column. After inserting the bullet, the headlights again began to operate properly and the two men proceeded toward the White River bridge. After traveling about 20 miles and just before crossing the river, the bullet apparently overheated, discharged and struck Poole in the testicles. The vehicle swerved sharply right, exiting the pavement and striking a tree.  Poole suffered only minor cuts and abrasions from the accident, but will require surgery to repair the other wound. Wallis sustained a broken clavicle and was treated and released. "Thank God we weren't on that bridge when Thurston shot his balls off or we might both be dead" stated Wallis.  "I've been a trooper for ten years in this part of the world, but this is a first for me. I can't believe that those two would admit how this accident happened," said Deputy Snyder.  Upon being notified of the wreck, Lavinia, Poole's wife, asked how many frogs the boys had caught and did anyone get them from the truck. (Way to go, Lavinia).


The Gigger's Lament by Amos
(Tune:  "I Got No Use Fer Wimmin" -- Click To Play)

I got no use for them froggies
For gigging out under the moon
'Cuz buddy, I've learned me my lesson
And I learned it none too soon;
'Cuz gigging them frogs make you crazy
And gigging them frogs makes you dumb,
Jest listen to the tale that I tell you,
An' you'll unnerstan' how come.

Mah frien' was an honest frog-gigger.
He was upright, an' honest and square
But he ended up guardin' a harem,
An' t'was giggin, put him there.
If he'd just stayed at home with  his Missus
He might have been raisin' a son!
Instead, he was turned to a yewnick
With a shot from his own frog gun.

His  old Chevy pickup was trusty,
Though its springs were as broken as hell;
When a blown fuse took out both his headlights,
He jes' stuck in a twenty-two shell.
Down back country roads, then at midnight,
We bounced along our way,
But  impedance overheated that cartridge,
And it blew his nuts away.

Ah know that it wasn't too clever;
Ah know it was dumber than squat!
But my friend, when your balls are blown open,
It's too late to think of that!
We got him rushed over t' the Clinic
But the local press published his name
And the pore boy had to flee to Poonjabi,
To escape a life of shame.

So now he stands guarding a harem,
While someone else gets all the fun,
And he can't see a frog without weeping,
An' he's scared to touch a gun.
So Ah'll say good by to the bayou,
And the midnight call of the loon,
An' never more will I go giggin'
By the light of that bayou moon.

Back to Top