Shit From A Dog On My Shoe by mousethief


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Punter Shop Pilferer Put In Pokey By Poo On Shoe -- SYDNEY (Reuters) - A glob of dog excrement on a Queensland robber's shoe has been used as evidence to identify him, landing him with a 10-year stretch for a betting shop hold-up on Australia's Gold Coast. Police said Thursday they had used enhanced photos from a security camera to match the pattern of excrement found at the crime scene to that on 26-year-old Jacob Smith's shoe. "It's not rocket science. It's as plain as poo on your shoe," police sergeant Alan Piper, a veteran scientific officer, was quoted by local media as saying. "It could have been one of a thousand or ten thousand shoes, but because that poo was there it was creating a great big feature that allowed us to go to a positive identification." "I'd say there has been some more poo on the shoe but it has worn away," said Piper, who admitted to also doing a smell test. Smith, who had wrapped a sheet around his face to hide his identity during the heist, was jailed in June for 10 years and 10 months on charges of robbery, being armed and in company and unlawful use of a motor vehicle.

Shit From A Dog On My Shoe by mousethief
(Tune: Sittin' On The Dock Of The Bay)

Sittin' in my prison cell
I'll be sittin' here for years this spell
I robbed a betting store
Thought I'd get away for shore

But this shit from a dog on my shoe
Left a big trail of doggie poo
This shit from a dog on my shoe
Got me caught, awwwwwwwwt.

I left my home this morning
Headed for the betting shop
On the way I musta stepped in
Something that Rover dropped

Now this shit from a dog on my shoe
Left a big trail of doggie poo
This shit from a dog on my shoe
Got me caught, awwwwwwt.

Looked like nothing could go wrong
Wrapped my face with a linen thong
But I stepped in a big pile of doggie poo
So following my trail was easy to do

Detective Piper has caught me
Yes that cop is very bright
He sniffed the soles of my Nikes
Then put the cuffs on good and tight

Yeah this shit from a dog on my shoe
Left a big trail of doggie poo
This shit from a dog on my shoe
Got me caught, awwwwwwwwt.

(fade out: whistling; seagull & surf SFX)

Copyright ©2002 Alex Riggle. All Rights Reserved