Selma The Swedish Monster by Bradypus, MMario, Dharmabum and hesperis


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The Song Challenge: There Are More Things In Heaven And Earth, Horatio . . . From creatures of the deep to massive mountain monsters, legends of shy prehistoric forms of wildlife persist throughout European culture and history. But now Norway has a rival to the famed Loch Ness monster of Scotland -- "Selma," a fabled serpent which has caught the attention of an international team of monster hunters. Reports of a beast in the lake first surfaced around 1750, and most accounts agree it looks like a serpent with the head of an elk or a horse. A giant trap for catching the creature, reputed to be a cousin of 'Nessie', has been set up in a lake in south Norway. The 18-foot (6m) long tube-shaped trap, comprising a metal frame with nylon netting, is set to be lowered into Seljord lake in south Norway and will contain live fish for bait to catch "Selma." Over the next two weeks, the team will dangle the cage in the lake, near where sightings of the monster have been reported. The latest attempt to catch Nessie's Norwegian cousin follows other sightings in Scandinavian countries. Swedish monster spotters have been kept busy in recent years with a rush of stories about a similar strain of serpent. Five years ago, a new legend was born in Lake Van, Turkey. Authorities recorded witness accounts of a monster-like dinosaur in the country's largest lake. And across the Atlantic, Canada has its own version of the mystery, the Ogopogo.

Selma The Swedish Monster by Bradypus, MMario, Dharmabum and hesperis
(Tune: Rudolph, The Rednosed Reindeer)

Selma the Swedish monster
Had a very kinky tail
And if you ever saw it
You would shout and shriek and wail

All of the other monsters,
Had a contest in the fall,
To see which of the family,
Was the scariest of all.

Then one stormy hallows eve
A specter came to say
"That one with the tail kinky
She's the one to make 'em flee!"

Then all the monsters hollered
And they shouted evilly
Selma, the swedish monster,
Selma is the most scary!

Selma the Swedish monster
Surfaced from the lake so deep
Let out a monster belch and
Woke the natives from their sleep

Then the Swedes got torches bright
Bonfires lit the night
And when the coals were red and hot
They roasted Selma on the spot!

With sauces made out of mustard
And a pint of something stout
After they ate poor Selma
Them Swedes done pissed the fires out!