Ring of Pyre by Clifton53


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The Song Challenge: The Day That Saji's Sari Slipped and Baji's Bobbin Got Buffed . . . India's health minister has banned the use of condoms to lubricate bobbins used in weaving saris. CP Thakur has told parliament sari makers are using condoms to speed up weaving because condom lubricant was also good at stopping yarn from snapping. Mr. Thakur claims the use of so many condoms in the sari industry is affecting India's population control programme. "Instructions have been issued to stop this practice," Mr Thakur said. Mr Thakur says the use of condoms in weaving is causing shortages and instances of unscrupulous government health workers meant to distribute free condoms to contain population instead selling the condoms to sari makers. Workers rub the condoms on bobbins while they make their brocade saris. The industry is using an estimated half a million condoms every day. Each of the 125,000 looms in the city of Varanasi uses an average four condoms per day. It takes nearly 15 condoms to produce one Benarasi sari. The lubricant on the condom smoothens the bobbin and makes it move faster between threads..

Ring of Pyre by Clifton53

Well looms, are a troublesome thing
Gotta run them right, to make them zing
Sheath your sword, still your desire
Stay away from the Ring of Pyre

Don't be fooled by the burnin' Ring of Pyre
Keep your bobbins greased,they won't make you retire
And it turns turns turns, the Ring of Pyre
The Ring of Pyre

Well 'ol Maheesh, he had a plan
He could be, a loomin' man
Condom grease, would light his fire
He could handle the Ring of Pyre

He had plans for the burnin' Ring of Pyre
"They can't get rid of me, another they can't hire"
And still he earns earns earns,from the Ring of Pyre
The Ring of Pyre

He ran that loom, real fast and loose
To cover all, them big caboose
The saris flew, right off his lot
'Ol Maheesh was really hot

He was boss of the burnin' Ring of Pyre
He had six wives, many Hindi he did sire
For he could learn learn learn,'bout the Ring of Pyre
The Ring of Pyre

He packed it in, at forty-five
The finest weaver, still alive
When he was asked, what made this so
He said " just grease yourself and go"

Don't be cowed like a burnin' Ring of Pyre
Stand up straight through the muck and mire
And you'll spurn spurn spurn, the Ring of Pyre
The Ring of Pyre
The Ring of Pyre
The Ring of Pyre