SONG CHALLENGE WINNER!

The Song Challenge:   Maybe it was the tin-foil panties, maybe it's the summer heat, maybe it's our brand new grill; but, I find myself 'lusting in my heart' for some barbequed spare ribs, don't you?  That must be why I've picked this Challenge! idea from Roger the skiffler this time . . .   I can't help myself, I'd just love to see -- Babe On The Block -- From Roger the skiffler (22-Jun-01) I offer this as a possible future challenge, scope for sentimental song:   (BTW the pig was saved by the judge).  The owner of a retired celebrity pig is fighting a legal battle to save him from the foot-and-mouth slaughter. Grunty, a rare Maori kune kune pig, starred in a children's television film and has his own website.  But his fame did not stop an inspector from the Department for Environment Food and Rural Affairs (Defra) from ordering him to be culled under the foot-and-mouth regulations.  Grunty's farm in Somerset was condemned because his owner had visited another of her holdings, which turned out to be infected.  Rosemary Upton, of Hill Farm, Stawley, near Wellington, Somerset, is applying for permission to seek a judicial review.   Appearing for her, Stephen Smith QC, suggested that Grunty had a much stronger case for survival than Phoenix the calf, saved after a blaze of publicity in April.  Grunty starred in Pig at the Ritz on Channel Five and in pleasanter times has accompanied Mrs. Upton on trips to the local village.

Mmmmmmmm -- this Challenge! sounds finger-licking good!!  (now where did I put that Worchester Sauce???).


Piggy at the Ritz by Jack the Sailor

Jack's Comments:   Here is a multipurpose masterpiece ****SSBG***** (Self Satisfied Big Grin)   Here I have injected my usual consumer comentary, and a reference to my favourite Song Challenge! mammal.   I also have managed to insult hogs and hog farmers everywhere introduce potty humour and, most importantly, if American musical icons do turn over in thier graves, Mr. Irving Berlin is now doing more rpms than the hard drive in my computer.


If you are a mess and want to confess to the best
Why don't you go where the kune kune sits
Piggy at the Ritz

Different types of feces has the civet
The droppings of the pig make owners livid,
giving them fits
worthless little shits

Dressed up with pine--apple he'd be super
Flat'lance like a whoopie cusion blooper
Pooper Scooper

Come let's mix where swine are roasted on sticks
Over Bar-B-cue Pits
Turnin 'em on Spits

Have you seen that famous hog? He is lucky as a dog
On that farm in Sommerset. He is safe there you can bet
Eats dirt he even swallows, as in, his filth he wollows
Recycling every bit of his marvelous food

If you're mean and you do not like the clean scene
Why don't you go where Grunty shits
Piggy at the Ritz

Foot and mouth contaminate the brown cows
Even infects their naughty bits
Piggy at the Ritz

Inspector said that grunty was contageous
Judge said to the plaintif that's outrageous
The pig is famous

Grunty is a Maori, Once more, people can't you see
He is not the kind of pig whose hair one splits
Piggy at the Ritz
Piggy at the Ritz
Piggy at the Ritz
Piggy at the Ritz

Grunt !!!
Gotta Wallow !!!
Gotta roll in the filth !!!!

If you think you must free a TV, pig, celebrity
Surely you must,
think this case is just.

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