SONG CHALLENGE WINNER!

The Song Challenge:  An Official Double Dip Dare . . . -- Dare One:  When This Pig Gets Pumped . . . -- A pot-bellied pig sank his teeth into the leg of a burglar who was trying to rob his owner.   Arnold, who weighs 21 stone, also stopped a burglar from getting into a neighbour's house by biting him.   The animal has become a celebrity among police officers in his home town of Minneapolis.   Arnold first showed his crime fighting abilities when his owner Becky Moyer spotted burglars in her garage.  She told the Star Tribune: "There were two guys in there.   One of them put something in my back that felt like a gun, and they said they wanted my purse.  I said my purse was in the house.  When we went in, I screamed for Arnold, and he got up and grabbed the guy by the leg.  He yelled, 'There's a pig in here!' and ran.  There was blood all over."  She added: "The police gave him that 'crime-fighter' name.  When they're in the neighbourhood, they like to stop by and pet him."  Arnold was a present from her boyfriend.   "Some people get lingerie," she said. "I got a pig."  Dare Two:  . . . The Police Get Pissed . . . -- A Florida policeman who caught a trouble-making pig after a 300-yard chase had to call for back-up to help him keep it under 'arrest'.  Ocala officer Carl Dunlap managed to hold on to the 14-stone pig's ears and hind legs but said he was afraid the pig would wriggle free.   Three fellow officers arrived on the scene and managed to herd it on to a trailer.   Residents had complained the pig had been destroying property.  "He spotted the hog, chased him for about 300 yards and finally was able to wrestle him to the ground,'' said Captain Robert Douglas, who heard his shouts for help over the radio.  Minutes later, Captain Douglas, Captain Mike Deen and Deputy John Shivley arrived on the scene to help Dunlap end the struggle.  "The first thing Dunlap said was that he sure was glad we showed up because he really didn't know how much longer he was going to be able to hold on," Captain Douglas said.  The four men loaded the pig on to a trailer and took it to Marion County Animal Control buildings, where officials placed the pig in a dog pen.


The Pig and the Fussy Brat by SharonA
(Tune{?}:   "The Owl and the Pussycat")

SharonA's Comments:  I've felt inspired to parody "The Owl and the Pussycat".   I'm sure it's been set to music, but I don't know the tune.  Anyway, here 'tis . . .  (Pronunciation guide:  Minneapolisian = MINN-yap-o-LEE -zhan (5 syllables)

The pig to the fussy brat sent was he, to a Minneapolisian house.
She told her honey who gave her the funny pet, "Undies this ain't, you louse!"
The pig looked toward the garage one night, and oinked o'er the small red car,
"Oh 'mommy' Becky! Oh Becky, what's wrong?
What a nervous young wreck-y you are, you are,
What a nervous young wreck-y you are!"

Said crooks with a growl, "Don't yell, girl. Don't howl, you wonderf'lly sweet young thing.
The purse that you carry, give to us. Don't tarry, or bullets into you will sting."
But she wailed away with a tear and a "hey" to the pig with the long, flat nose
And then, on a dude the piggy-wig chewed
And he'd cling there, offending his foes, his foes,
And he'd cling there, offending his foes.

'Oh, pig, it's so thrilling to tell that you're willing to bring down a prig with a will."
So the crooks ran away. They'd not tarried that day lest the jerks be the piggy's first kill.
No crime there since; the pig would make mincemeat of hated crooks once the girl'd swoon...
But on the lam is a Florida ham
That they can't, with three bright cops, bring doon, bring doon,
That they can't, with three bright cops, bring doon.

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