SONG CHALLENGE WINNER!

Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer, But Rita Got Returned To Wal-Mart OMAHA, Nebraska (Reuters) - A Nebraska woman who received an ornate box for Christmas and returned it to Wal-Mart without looking inside discovered later it contained the ashes of her recently deceased sister, a newspaper reported on Friday.  Judy Money received the box as a gift from her brother who lives in Iowa.  But after unwrapping the package on Christmas Eve she saw the box had a broken knob and decided to return it to Wal-Mart without ever looking at the contents inside, the Omaha World-Herald reported.  When Money later confessed to her brother that she had returned his gift, he told her the box contained the ashes of their sister, who had died Dec. 11, the Herald said.  Marvin Tippery, Money's brother, told the Herald he was shocked when he found out she had returned the box.  "No, no, you didn't! Your sister was in there," the Herald quoted him as telling Money.  Money told the Herald she made a mad dash back to Wal-Mart, but the box had already been thrown out with the trash.  Money and her brother finally found the box on Thursday amid trash piles at an area landfill.  "My prayers have been answered," she told the Herald.  "Just the thought of having her in the dump was awful."


Unfortunate Miss Rita by Sonja
(Tune:  Miss Bailey's Ghost)

A lady fair in Omaha who got a box for Christmas
Discovered it was damaged goods and shouted out "What is this"!?"
You'd think a store as fine as Walmart would not try to cheat ya!"
She took the crummy box right back, no thought of sister Rita.

Oh, Miss Rita, unfortunate Miss Rita!

That night before she went to bed, she called her brother Marvin.
Who said, "You know, to buy that box, for two months I've been starvin'!"
"Too bad," said she, "the box was junk. To Walmart I've returned it."
"Our sister's bod it held," he cried, "except, well, they had burned it!"

Oh, Miss Rita, unfortunate Miss Rita!

To Walmart then the two did dash, in hopes of saving sister.
"Tsk! Tsk!" the manager replied, "It seems that you just missed her.
The trash has just gone out, you see. Your sister's ash was in there.
You might explore the city dump--though no sane person's been there!"

Oh, Miss Rita, unfortunate Miss Rita!

"Look here," said Judy, "could this be our dear departed Rita?"
Cried Marvin, "No, it's just a decomposing Weekly Reader."
"This dump," said Judy, "is so full of yucky, foul detritus
And any remnants we may find just might be sister Rita's."

Oh, Miss Rita, unfortunate Miss Rita!

At last they stumbled on the box 'mid vast decaying matter
And took their dear old sister home, her ashes now to scatter.
"God bless us, everyone!" proclaimed the ghost of sister Rita,
I didn't want to smell like garbage when I meet St. Peter!"

Oh, Miss Rita! They've rescued sister Rita!

"Thank Heaven, Rita!" then they cried, "Since we have found your box now
You'll live forever 'mid the daffodils and hollyhocks now.
"These words inscribe upon my grave." said she to those who'd freed 'er,
"'Blast that wicked Walmart chain for trashing poor Miss Rita!'"

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