Mike The Knife by Áine


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Anyone is welcome to perform these songs in public without royalties; however, if any of them are recorded or published for profit, the writers/composers expect the usual royalties.

The Song Challenge: That's One Scrappy Rooster! -- For 18 months in the 1940s, it seemed as if Mike the headless chicken might be immortal. Now he's being immortalized in a 4-foot metal sculpture to be stuck in a planter on a downtown corner in his hometown of Fruita, Colorado. The 300-pound replica of Mike was made using ax heads and hay-rake teeth, along with sickle blades and other cutting objects. "I made him proud-looking and cocky," said the artist, Lyle Nichols, a Fruita native. The rooster belonged to Fruita farmer Lloyd Olsen, who planned to put Mike into the cooking pot and lopped off his head at the base of the skull to leave as much of the tasty neck as possible. But Mike just fluffed up his feathers -- although he could only go through the motions of pecking for food, and when he tried to crow, a gurgle came out. But he was still alive the next morning. Olsen started putting feed and water directly into Mike's gullet with an eyedropper. Mike lived for 18 months, making it into Life magazine and the Guinness Book of World Records, and was a popular attraction until he choked to death on a corn kernel in an Arizona motel while on tour. Fruita officials dug up his story last spring when they were looking for something besides pioneers to focus on for Colorado Heritage Week. That led to the first Mike the Headless Chicken Festival. In addition to food (fried chicken) and music, this year's festival is scheduled to feature "The Run Like A Chicken With Your Head Cut Off 5K."

Mike The Knife by Áine
(Tune: Mack The Knife; with intense apologies to Kurt Weill and Bertol Brecht!)

Oh the knife was sharp and swift, dear
And ole Mike's head toppled off
Well, he jumped up and tried to crow, dear
But all that came out was a cough!

Ole Farmer Lloyd was just amazed, dear
When Headless Mike he got up and walked
That ole lightbulb glowed bright above him
He could use Mike to make a buck!

First he hauled Mike up to the college, dear
Where the profs there pronounced him 'real'
Into Life mag, then to the Guinness book
That just increased Mike's appeal!

In Arizona - a cheap motel room
Poor ole Mike's doom, it was sealed
When he choked on a big kernel
Farmer Lloyd fried him in corn meal!

Now Headless Mike's name it was lost, dear
More than fifty years had gone by
When the mayor of Fruita C-O
Had a brainstorm, that's no lie!

Now old Mike has his own party
And a race named after him
Farmer Lloyd spins in his grave, dear
His chance to cash in is pretty slim!

Henny Penny, Foghorn Leghorn
Fry up crispy, nice and brown
Oh the line forms on the right, dear
Now that Mike is back in town!