SONG CHALLENGE WINNER!

The Song Challenge:   Whilst cleaning up the old Song Challenge! files, getting ready for the Songbook's big move 'home', I found several Challenge! ideas that seem to be tied together in some, like, ya know, cosmic way, man.   ;-)   So, being that goddesses have to be cruel to be kind (oh behave, Amos!), I've decided to raise the bar for the Whole Bag O' Chips by creating a new award -- The Double Dip Copper Cow Chip (with Sprinkles), which will be awarded for connecting the dizzying dots between two or more Challenge! ideas in a song for any Official Double Dip Dare from the Keeper of the Book.   And for my first 'Official' Double Dip Dare, please do not adjust your seat belts and consider the following . . .

Boys who play with their praties . . . -- (OSLO, Norway) Police have confiscated a potentially lethal home-made cannon capable of firing potatoes up to 160 feet.  Six youths in the seaside town of Kristiansand in southern Norway used instructions on the Internet to build the weapon from everyday household objects.  "This home-made weapon is extremely dangerous both for those using it and those being fired at," a police spokesman told the newspaper Faedrelandsvennen.  The boys loaded potatoes down a plastic tube, where an electric ignition device from a gas-fuelled barbecue was installed.  By spraying a flammable gas into the tube and sealing the open end with a cap, potatoes were converted into projectiles with one push of the red ignition button.  Police said the cannon was capable of launching any object similar in size and weight to potatoes.

. . . grow up to be men with issues . . . -- London's Steve Bennett continues his quest to become the world's most successful amateur rocket engineer, with all systems go for launching himself into space in a "test flight" (to an altitude of 10,000 feet) in 2003 on a venture that most professional engineers called foolhardy, according to a June story reported by the BBC.  The more that is known about Bennett's mission (e.g., he recently said it would be a rocket capsule made from a cement mixer, with modest installation and a small computer), the more rocket scientists believe his launch will result in instant death.  However, the louder the criticism, the more certain of himself Bennett professes to be. He still rejects conventional preparations such as wind-tunnel tests and g-force tests:  "That is what the test flight is for," he said.


The Leader of the Granola Community by Amos
(Tune: "Ruler of the Queen's Navy", G. S. Gilbert)

When I was a lad I made a try,
At designing weapons that would shoot french fries
I'd raid the larder with a couple of friends,
But what made it harder is the fries would bend!

I raided mother's larder with a hand so deft
That now I am the pride of the Granola Left!
He raided mother's larder with a hand so deft
That now he is the pride of the Granola Left!

Though my french-fry firing was a dud
I graduated quickly up to hard-boiled spuds
With a three-foot tube from plumbing stock
I was knocking off the pigeons on the village clock!

I slaughtered all those pigeons with a bang so loud
That now I am the pride of the Granola Crowd!
He slaughtered all those pigeons with a bang so loud
That now he is the pride of the Granola Crowd!

From shooting spuds I learned my style
And I got them elevated up to half-a-mile
Then I moved ahead, onto grander schemes
Pursuing all the dreams that a man can dream!

I followed my dreams with such alacrity
That now I am the head of the Granola Free!
He followed his dreams with such alacrity
That now he is the head of the Granola Free!

As a grown man now I have vanquished fear,
I intend to launch myself into the stratosphere
Though lesser mortals my demur,
My wife wants me to do it and I side with her!

With a cement tub as a space-capsule
I will be the highest star in the Granola School!
With a cement tub as his space capsule
He will be the highest star in the Granola School!

So all you lads with a yen for fun,
Just take your inspiration from what i have done
Pursue your dreams, and build a name,
Never matter if it leaves your body wrapped in flames!

Pursue your visions, and you soon will be
The biggest nut of all on the Granola tree!
Pursue your visions, and you soon will be
The biggest nut of all on the Granola tree!

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