SONG CHALLENGE WINNER!

What A Fella Will Do For A Good Irish Stew! . . . A house burglar in South London ignored a video recorder, mobile phones and other valuables – but stole a pan of Irish stew.  Clare Wilson, from Mitcham, made the dish for the next day's dinner, then left it on her oven and went to bed.  The next morning it had vanished, but nothing else had been taken.  Ms. Wilson, a mum of four, told The Sun: "I know my cooking is good but this is ridiculous.  It's unbelievable someone would just take a stew when all that stuff was lying about the place.  I'm considering putting out reward posters asking people if they've seen my stew pot.  I've been making stew for over 20 years in that pot, and I'm a bit annoyed.  I've got several others, but it was my favourite.  It's just the right size for all the family.  The thief must have tasted the food first because I found dollops of it around the top of the stove."  Ms. Wilson's sons, Brian, 20, and Scott, 19, swear they did not eat the stew after getting in from the pub – they had a kebab on the way home.  The back door had been forced open, so Ms. Wilson reported the crime to Mitcham police.  She said: "The thief should have just knocked on the door.  I'd have invited them along for dinner.  There would have been enough for everyone."


Keep Your Hands Off My Irish Stew by Amos
(Tune: Blue Suede Shoes (Click to Play))

Well you can steal my tapes, you can take my car,
Steal my teeth from the bedside jar.
But uhhhuh, honey lay offa my Irish stew!!
Well you can do anything, but lay offa my Irish stew!

Take my china, Delftt and Blue,
Take my CDs and my records too,
But one damn thing that you better not do,
Is baby, lay offa my Irish stew!!
Well you can do anything but lay offa my Irish stew!

I came home it was late last night
Found my Ma in one helluva fright
Screaming, Baby, they messed with my Irish stew!
They coulda had anything but they messed with my Irish stew!!

She ran to the bedroom, dropped to the floor,
Pulled out her old blue-steel forty-four,
Screamin' Damn them! Messed with my Irish stew!!
They coulda had anything but they messed with my Irish stew.

She wasn't wearing no hat,
Wearing no shoes,
But she surely knew what she meant to do!
Hunting down the man who had messed with her Irish stew!!
Do anything! But don't touch my Irish stew!

She found her man by the old drive-in,
Carrot gravy all over his chin!
And she told him, lay offa my Irish stew!
You coulda had anything, but you messed with my Irish stew!

Well, the next thing anybody knew,
He had holes in his chest you could look right through!
I tole ya, don't touch my goddamn stew!
You can do anything!! But lay offa my Irish stew!

Now how come Ma's got such a crazy look?
It's the only damn thing she knows how to cook,
So don't you,
Mess with her Irish stew!

You can do anything, but lay offa her Irish stew!!

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