The Hong Kong Goose by granny


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Anyone is welcome to perform these songs in public without royalties; however, if any of them are recorded or published for profit, the writers/composers expect the usual royalties.

The Song Challenge: Yes, Virginia, There Really Is A Pot O' Gold! -- (HONG KONG, China) A Hong Kong jeweler has opened his doors to what is possibly the world's most glamorous convenience -- a glittering golden bathroom complete with two 24-carat solid gold toilets. Having learned in school that Lenin had wanted to make gold toilets for the Russian people, Lam Sai-wing says he had long dreamed of creating the ultimate in lavish loos. Now the owner of a successful jewelers, Lam has finally turned his ideal dream into a $4.9 million reality. Replete with gold wash basins, toilet brushes, toilet paper holders, mirrors, chandeliers and even wall tiles and doors made of solid gold, the 45-year old businessman calls his creation "a combination of my thoughts and ideals". Inside the ceiling of the "ancient Roman-style" washroom is encrusted with ruby, sapphire, emerald and amber. However, visitors to Lam's luxury lavatory will find that it is open only to an exclusive few. Potential users will have to spend at least HK$1,000 (U.S.$138) on jewelry for the privilege to relieve themselves amid the finery. The restroom was not to everyone's taste though. "It's too wasteful, said one visitor. Others who had the opportunity to make a dazzling deposit were more appreciative of the marketing concept behind the convenience. Wang Xifeng, a visitor from mainland China, said she appreciated Lenin's vision and Lam's realization of it. "It's a good selling point," she said with a smile. "It's a dream come true." For a peek at the pot, click here!

The Hong Kong Goose by granny

The 'goose that laid the golden egg'
Went honking through Hong Kong
A jeweler grabbed her by the leg,
Said, 'Please don't take this wrong --

But, I 've got just the place for you,
A nest of shining gold;
You lay some eggs, and, 'pay-per-view,'
My patrons shall behold!

Chorus:
It's honk, honk
Honk on, Hong Kong Goose
It's honk, honk
Honk on, Hong Kong Goose
Keep honkin' that horn,
Someday they'll let you loose.

Oh, silly goose! They love her best
Not just for a golden egg;
To hear her singing from her nest
The jewelry patrons beg;

But, more than rings at Lam Sai-wing's,
And more than honks and clucks,
The eggs the goose lays while she 'sings'
Are really making bucks!