SONG CHALLENGE WINNER!

The Song Challenge:   This Challenge! was suggested by sophocleese (thanks!). If you're getting those summertime doldrums (or wintertime doldrums, if you're one of our NZ/OZ friends), here's a frisky little Challenge! that ought to blow those doldrums right away (hehehehehe):   So A Man Walks Into A Bar With A Fox Under His Arm And... -- "This whole story has been blown out of all proportion," said a spokeswoman for the Over and Sons garage in Aspatria. "It's true that last week a man walked onto our forecourt in the Market Place with a fox under his arm, pushed the nozzle of the compressed air line into the animal's rectum, put 20p in the slot, and pumped it until it exploded. But what the newspaper reports didn't mention was that the animal was already dead."   The spokeswoman explained that the garage had been under siege for several days following reports about the incident. A report appeared in the local paper, talking about 'this sickening and horrible act,' and next day the nasty phone calls started. Animal rights activists even threatened to make reprisal attacks on the garage, and more staff were called in.   But what had really happened was that an amateur taxidermist had brought the dead fox in, and asked if he could pump some air between the fur and the skin, to loosen the pelt. After apparently 'overdoing' it a bit, he then ran away in embarrassment. The garage's spokeswoman continued, "It ought to be obvious to anyone that the animal couldn't have been alive. I mean, it's hard enough to even hold a live fox, let alone insert an air-line up its rectum.  I should imagine."   Police later confirmed that they had spoken to a man about the incident. "We are convinced that no criminal act has taken place, but we did warn him about the inadvisability of inflating animals in a public place." 

Honey, I Blew Up The Fox! by Naemanson
(Tune:  "The Fox Went Out On A Chilly Night")

A fox was slain on a moonlit night,
Swerved left on the road when he should have swerved right,
Got crunched under wheels that he tried to bite
And wound up dead on the road-o, road-o, road-o
Got crunched under wheels that he tried to bite
And wound up dead on the road-o.

A taxidermist put him into a box,
Was happy he had found a dead fox,
While he was out and about on his walk,
And he took it home to stuff-o, stuff-o, stuff-o
While he was out and about on his walk,
And he took it home to stuff-o

He opened the box while in his shop,
Looked in side and then he stopped,
There's got to be a better way he thought,
To skin this poor dead fox-o, fox-o, fox-o
There's got to be a better way he thought,
To skin this poor dead fox-o.

He looked at his knives and his scalpel too,
Considering the messy job they'd do,
He thought some high pressure air would do,
To easily peel the skin-o, skin-o, skin-o
He thought some high pressure air would do,
To easily peel the skin-o.

To Over & Sons he made his way,
In the Market Place in Aspatri-ay
And in the box the dead fox lay,
As he made his way to the town-o, town-o, town-o
And in the box the dead fox lay,
As he made his way to the town-o

He picked up the end of the air hose,
Tried to fit it to the animal's nose,
But even duct tape couldn't keep it closed
And it fell out on the ground-o, ground-o, ground-o
But even duct tape couldn't keep it closed
And it fell out on the ground-o.

So he laid the fox out on the ground
Studied the problem while wearing a frown,
But the answer came from a person in the crowd,
Stick it up his arsehole, arsehole, arsehole
But the answer came from a person in the crowd,
Stick it up his arsehole, arsehole, arsehole

So he stuck it up the fox's sphincter,
All the while his face got pinker,
And the coins into the slot went clink,
And the air began to pump-o, pump-o, pump-o 
And the coins into the slot went clink,
And the air began to pump-o.

With the air the fox swelled and swelled,
The taxidermist tapped to loosen the pelt,
He wondered what it was he smelt,
When the fox blew all a part-o, part-o, part-o
He wondered what it was he smelt,
When the fox blew all a part-o.

Bits and pieces flew here and there,
Some on the ground and some in the air,
The crowd was splattered on their shirts and hair
And began to get quite mad-o, mad-o, mad-o
The crowd was splattered on their shirts and hair
And began to get quite mad-o

The taxidermist they began to chase
But he had his running shoes well laced
And he ran into the policeman's place
And begged them to protect-o, protect-o, protect-o
And he ran into the policeman's place
And begged them to protect-o

They spoke to him in voices stern
He had, they hoped, his lesson learned,
When again his inspiration burned,
He'd not inflate a fox-o, fox-o, fox-o
When his inspiration burned,
He'd not inflate a fox-o.

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