Heard It From the Mynah by mousethief


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The Song Challenge: Polly Want a Divorce? SHANGHAI (Reuters) - A Chinese housewife is seeking divorce claiming the family's talking bird dropped clues on her husband's illicit affair, state media said on Tuesday. The woman from southwestern Chongqing city said she uncovered the affair when their mynah began saying things like "Divorce," "I love you" and "Be patient" after it overheard the husband's telephone calls with his mistress, the Xinmin Evening News said. The woman said she noticed the feathered tattle-tale's strange new vocabulary after she returned from a month-long visit with her parents that started in May. Already suspecting her husband was having an affair, she observed that the bird became particularly talkative whenever the telephone rang, confirming her suspicions, the report said. Last week she brought the bird to a law office for consultation, hoping it could testify in court. "Can my mynah be used as witness?" the newspaper quoted her as asking. Lawyers were not optimistic. "The judges are unlikely to rule against your husband based only on the mynah's words," attorney Wu Di was quoted as telling her.

Heard It From the Mynah by mousethief
(Tune: Heard It Through the Grapevine)

Ooooh, I bet you wonder how I knew
About your plans to make me blue
With some little gal on the telephone
That you talk to when I'm not at home
I know you pla-a-an to let me go
A little birdie told me so

Oooh, I heard it from the mynah
As a mimic, no bird's fynah
Oooh, I heard it from the mynah
And I'd like to give your eye a shynah
Honey honey, yeah

(background singers:
Heard it from the mynah
Not much longer will you be my hus-band)

Now, a mimic is this bird, of course
So how'd it learn to say the word "divorce"?
And "Be patient; wait a little more"
Unless you said it to your little wh***?
Now it's been a rotten week
Since I heard it from my birdie's beak

Oooh, I heard it from the mynah
As a mimic, no bird's fynah
Yeah, I heard it from the mynah
Now my tears are smearing' my eye-lynah
(Honey, honey, yeah)

So I went down to my lawyer's place
Stuck my mynah in my lawyer's face
And said, "Tell the man just what you heard!"
And my mynah said the "divorce" word
But my lawyer looked me in the eye
He said, "Lady, birds can't testify!"

Oooh, I heard it from the mynah
As a mimic, no bird's fynah
Yeah, I heard it from the mynah
And I'd like to kick your fat behynah
(Honey, honey, yeah)

Copyright ©2001 Alex Riggle. All Rights Reserved.