SONG CHALLENGE WINNER!

The Song Challenge:   Beelzebub Bytes!   Forget about viruses and malicious hackers; the real threat these days is far more insidious. Your home computer may have the Devil in its data, say Reverend Jim Peasboro of Georgia. "... the Computer Age has ... opened yet another door through which Lucifer and his minions can enter and corrupt men's souls."   Rev. Jim says he became aware of the problem from counseling churchgoers. "I learned that many members of my congregation became in touch with a dark force whenever they used their computers," ... "Decent, happily married family men were drawn irresistibly to pornographic Web sites and forced to witness unspeakable abominations."  "Housewives who had never expressed an impure thought were entering Internet chat rooms and found themselves spewing foul, debasing language they would never use normally," he declared ... One woman ... confessed to me, 'I feel when I'm on the computer as if someone else or something else just takes over.'"   The minister said he probed one such case, actually logging onto the parishioner's computer himself. To his horror, an artificial-intelligence program started spontaneously. "The program began talking directly to me, openly mocked me," he said. Then the device went haywire and started printing out what looked like gobbledygook.   "I later had an expert in dead languages examine the text," the minister said. "It turned out to be a stream of obscenities written in a 2,800-year-old Mesopotamian dialect!" The minister estimates that one in ten computers in America now hosts some type of evil spirit. The Reverend advises anyone suspecting that their computer is possessed to consult a clergyman, or, if the computer is still under warranty, to take it in for servicing. "   Technicians can replace the hard drive and reinstall the software, getting rid of the wicked spirit permanently," he says.   However, there is some good news -- Only a PC built after 1985 has the storage capacity to house an evil spirit, the minister explained.


False Fruit On The Bough by Eluned
(Tune:  The False Knight on the Road)

Eluned's Comments:  Ok, you asked for it!  I only hope some of you are familiar with the origin tune.  There's nothing haw-haw funny in this, but it's heavy in irony (and other stuff of that sort).


Oh, never eat that apple, said the Lord God on high above;
Oh, no I won't do that, says Adam unto the Lord. 
Just live here in Eden, said the Lord God of love;
Yes Lord, then says Adam, with Eve here I won't get bored.

Oh, why not eat that apple, said smart Eve unto her beau:
I guess then I will try it, says Adam unto his wife. 
Now we need some clothes, said smart Eve, with no tresseau: 
I guess I'll have to work, says Adam, and got a life.

Oh, don't you buy that Apple, said Rev Jim Peasb'ro:
Oh, no we won't do that, say his church goers and his peers.
Shall we buy that Apple? said woman to her beau; 
Yes, please, let's do that, said the man, I'd like to dear!

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