Dreams Of Marriage
From the telling of Amergin
Well...there was this young couple lying next to each other after a fabulous love making session, one night. They snuggled and kissed and traded I love yous and so on.
The young man, John, turned to his lady, Deirdre, and asked:
"Do you ever think about the future? The future of us?"
She turned to him and said, "Yes, I do, everyday."
"Me, too, sweetie. I was just thinking about us. About how you will bear me thirteen children and work three jobs, your main job at the newspaper, and two part time jobs, MacDonald's and the local Blockbuster. How you will come back home on your breaks to take care of the children, change their diapers, clean up their various messes, and fix us our meals. you will come back to the bedroom to the computer where I will be playing games and surfing on our cable connection, that you pay for, and feed me by your own hand, with each spoonful of food that you lift to my loving lips. It will be great for you to support me in a manner to which I could easily become accustomed to. I love you."
Deirdre looked at him as he went on his spiel, her eyes getting wider and darker with each word dripping from his mouth. She got up out of bed, telling him, "I need to go to the bathroom."
"Ok" he lay back down on the bed, hands behind his head, eyes gazing up at the ceiling, as he beheld visions of his misguided dreams.
She came back into the dimly lit room, her arms behind her back. She looked down at him as he sat up and reached for her soft body. "THWACK!" an iron disk-like object flew from behind his love and smacked him in the head.
"AAAARRRGGGGHHHH!" he bawled holding his hands to his throbbing skull. He looked up at Deirdre and found her there holding a small frying pan, eyes sparking in the candle light. "What the he-"
"THWACK!" the pan came smashing into his head once more.
"Listen up, John! This is my idea of our splendid future! You will be spending your days inside a closet, living only to serve me! To please me! To make sure each and every need of mine is filled! If you do as you are told, you may, just may get some food. If not then you can forget it! Now get up out of that bed! Get into that closet and shut the door behind you! I want to sleep now! Understand?"
"Yes, dear."
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