SONG CHALLENGE WINNER!

Gadzooks, Batman, It's the G-String Gang! Holy Underwear! -- LONDON (Reuters) - Cheeky thieves, dubbed the "G-string Gang" by the British press, made off with thousands of pounds worth of racy underwear after a daylight raid on upmarket lingerie designer Agent Provocateur, a spokesman said on Tuesday.  The central London headquarters of Agent Provocateur, a favorite among celebrities such as Kate Moss and Liz Hurley, was burgled over the weekend by thieves who carried off 27,000 pounds ($40,000) worth of lacy bras, knickers and corsets as well as shoes and jewelry.  "We were all working upstairs when it appears the thieves broke down the front door and managed to steal the collections from the basement," said Agent Provocateur founder Joe Corre.  But the thieves, who got away with the fashion house's new collection, had not made an intelligent choice in targeting such an exclusive boutique, he said.  "The very nature of the designs, being so distinctive, renders them instantly recognizable, making it easier to track the thieves down, whatever they try to do with the collection."  Agent Provocateur is known for its sexy, slinky and expensive designs which include one-off corsets, suspenders, stockings and G-strings.  A spokesman for London's Metropolitan Police said the burglary was being investigated but there was no description of the suspects.


Don't Wear Any Pants That Are Made By The Chucks! by Isaac McKittery (a/k/a derrymacash)

Good luck till all here, McKittery's the name
No, I'll not have a sate, thanks a lot all the same
For I've only dropped by and I won't stay for long
I'll just stop for a minute till sing yez a song
I'm normally found in the thread 'bout Drumcree
It's the type of a thread that appeals well till me
For there you'll find boys that are loyal and true
Till the orange and black and the red, white and blue

CHORUS:
So here's till the boys from Tanderagee
Who're up till their oxters in glar in Drumcree
I'll sing this wee song, then come back in a flash
Till wear my white gloves and my bowler and sash

I went till Nutts Corner one Sunday of late
The crack till be had at the market is great
I met Kyle from Ahoghill and Derryadd Sam
And we spoke with great fondness of the town by the Bann
Until then round a stall a great crowd we did spy
"What's goin' on there, boy?" says Sammy till I
"Let's have a wee jewk", says I till my crew
And straight till the stall the three of us flew

CHORUS

There wiz knickers and drawers and g-strings and thongs
And all sorts of wonderful carryin'-on
Crotchless and lacy and frilly and sheer
(I imagined the boul' Rhondda decked out in that gear
It made my heart race and my mouth went all dry
Thon image will haunt me right up till I die!)
There was belts for suspenders and bras with no holders
To carry the pendulous paps of their owners

CHORUS

"What is the make of this stuff?" then I asked
When your man whispered till me, I let out a gasp
"Good people of Ulster, don't part with your cash
And buy any of this Republican trash!"
"Republican, how?" Brother Sammy did say
"A look at the label will gave it away …
For these knickers are made in Falls, believe me,
It says PROVO-cateur quite plainly to see!"

CHORUS

Our anger boiled over; we true sons of Bill,
Destroyed every stitch, every ribbon and frill
And trampled the rags into the thick clay
That's the blight of each farmer who farms near Lough Neagh
And we stood as one man when our work it was done
And the songs of our heritage loudly we sung
"The Boyne Water", "The Sash" and "The Magheralin Ducks"
And "Don't Wear Any Pants That Are Made By The Chucks"

CHORUS

Back to Top