SONG CHALLENGE WINNER!

Naughty Naturalists Nabbed in Night-Vision Nasty –– A couple at a lakeland holiday park were caught naked on cameras meant to monitor the movements of badgers.  The pair ventured into the snowy woods at the Oasis Village, near Penrith in Cumbria.  Their romp was beamed into every hotel bedroom on a special channel trained on the badger set.  The night-vision camera caught the couple in the early hours of the morning. The woman kept her bobble hat on, reports the News of the World.  The pair stopped when they heard a sound and quickly put their clothes on before being chased by a security guard with a torch.  The identity of the couple has not been revealed.


Cumbria's Green Glades by derrymacash

derrymacash's Comments:  OK, with the following parody of "Baneasa's Green Glade," I have *now* parodied every song from Planxty's "Cold Blow And The Rainy Night".  What a labour of love it's been.  When typing this out, I got confused in my mind's ear as to the tunes of Baneasa's Green Glades (which I don't much like) and Síle Ní Ghadhra as sung by Cathy Jordan of Dervish - which I *do* very much like. If you're familiar with the latter try singing the song to that air and see how well they gel!

When I was a youth in the prime of my life
I never knew bother I never knew strife
I rolled through the hay with the comeliest maids
Or succumbed to their charms in Cumbria's green glades

From the woods of Penrith to the town of Carlisle
I travelled the county, aye mile after mile
With the lassies I met, I sported and played
And cuddled and kissed them in Cumbria's green glades

Until one I met in a hat that was knitted
And all on the top, a wee tassel fitted
I said "You have beauty". She said "Looks will fade
So before they do, take me in Cumbria's green glades"

From the cool shades of evening, till up rose the sun
We played and we sported, and always in fun
Till up rose the damsel and straightaway made
A path to her home though Cumbria's green glade

"Oh pretty fair maiden, are you going away
To leave me heart-sore at the dawn of the day"
She sighed, "My young man, we have sported and played
But now I must leave you in Cumbria's green glade"

My poor heart was broken with anguish and pain
As I thought my true love I may not see again
"Did you not enjoy the love that we made
At it like badgers in Cumbria's green glades?"

"I did not enjoy, though I made lots of noise
But my job in this life is to trap fair young boys
And on closed-circuit telly our love games displayed
To a load of oul' perverts in Cumbria's green glades"

And so with these words she flitted like smoke
The thought of her treachery near made me boke
Never before have I been so betrayed
By a pretty fair maid in Cumbria's green glade

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