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He May Be Small, But He Ain't No Two-Bit Hamster! -- (Northampton, England, Thursday 22nd August 2002) A schoolboy who took his hamster on a bus journey to visit his grandmother was charged a 10p fare for the pet.  Jordan Underwood, 10, from King's Heath, Northampton, was stunned when after paying his own 55p fare, the bus driver demanded an extra 10p to allow Nibbles on board.  Bus company First Northampton has reportedly launched an investigation into the incident.  The animal was a gift from his 83-year-old grandmother to keep him company during the school holidays.  Jordan said: "I got on the bus and the man was saying what a lovely hamster it was. He said (the fare) was 55p and then looked at Nibbles and told me it was another 10p for him.  I don't think it was fair because you don't have to pay for dog or babies and their 10 times bigger. He didn't even use a seat because I put him on the floor and he was in a cage so he wasn't going to chew anything."  Jordan added Nibbles was "shocked" by the ordeal and they would both continue to use the buses but hoped that they didn't meet the same driver again.  His father, Todd, said: "There is a serious side to this, because he is only a little boy, and he might not have had enough money to get the bus back."


The Boy Who Never Returned by mousethief
(Tune: The Ship That Never Returned (by way of the MTA Protest Song))

Well, let me tell you of the story of a boy named Jordan
But it could be any one of us
He put 55p in his schoolboy pocket
Went to ride on the Northhampton bus

Well did he ever return, no he never returned
And his fate is still unlearned (what a pity)
He may ride forever thru the streets of King's Heath
He's the boy who never returned

Jordan got on the bus with his hamster Nibbles
And he paid the normal fee
But the bus driver said, "now you must pay for the hamster"
But he didn't have another 10p

Well did he ever return, no he never returned
And his fate is still unlearned (poor old Jordan)
He may ride forever thru the streets of King's Heath
He's the boy who never returned

Now all night long Jordan rides through the country
Crying, "Mister have you got 10p?"
"I just want to go see my dear old grannie
Who gave this sweet hamster to me"

Well did he ever return, no he never returned
And his fate is still unlearned (shame and scandal)
He may ride forever thru the streets of King's Heath
He's the boy who never returned

Jordan's mum goes down to the corner bus stop
Every day at quarter past two
And through the open window she hands Jordan a buttie
And a pellet for the hamster to chew

Well did he ever return, no he never returned
And his fate is still unlearned (he may ride forever)
He may ride forever thru the streets of King's Heath
He's the boy who never returned

Copyright ©2002 Alex Riggle. All Rights Reserved.

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