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SONG CHALLENGE WINNER!
The Song Challenge:
Chicken Of The Living Dead? -- Kay Martin, a secretary to a New Zealand MP, got the fright of her life a few weeks ago.
According to the Auckland Sunday Star, she and a friend were chatting over a drink when they heard a chicken squawking.
The bird sounded in some distress, so they went outside to investigate, thinking perhaps that it had escaped from one of the
neighbors. But, there were no chickens anywhere. Then Martin realized with horror that the sound was coming
from her own kitchen - coming, in fact, from the oven, where she had put a chicken in to roast half an hour earlier.
"It was as if it was shrieking at me from its grave," she says. "It was so bizarre I just froze." As they
approached the oven, the squawking reached a crescendo. They took the tray out, and as the chicken began to cool,
the squawking died away. Martin chopped the neck off and threw it in the sink. She noticed that the vocal
chords were intact. "Steam was coming up the neck from the stuffing," says Martin, and this had caused the dead bird
to squawk. She has not cooked chicken since. P.S. TO ALL CHALLENGE!RS: If any of you are looking to qualify for the 'Two-Fer' Award (or better), check out SONG CHALLENGE! Part 8, Part 22, and Part 42 on the Song Challenge!s Past page, and see how you can work this Challenge! and one or more of these past hoo-haws into a song . . . It's a Double Dawg Dare, so ya can't turn it down! '-) -- Á.
Boiling Lobster, Screaming Chicken by RobDale
RobDale's Comments: Still more comment on consumerism. I am hoping this song will br the basis for an organization called PETH -
People for the Ethical Treatment of Hens. Kind of spookily chanted over a Delta blues riff with scratchy percussion in the background.
Kind of a voodoo sound.
A chicken was squawking in my oven last night,
Or at least that's how it seemed.
A lobster was boiling in a restaurant,
Emitting terrible screams.
The horrors of both were explained right away --
The sound of escaping steam!
But maybe the causes are deeper than that!
Maybe they are actual squeals.
I know that I'll pay a terrible price,
If we are haunted by our meals!
I know that I'll have to pay terrible price,
But imagine how Colonel Sanders feels!
Our animal foods extracting revenge
Exacting a ghastly price
Begging for mercy from our briskets and chops
Is starting to seem very wise
Armies of chickens without any wings
Millions of frogs without legs
Thomas from "Wendys" is haunted by steer
And Denny is haunted by eggs
The chef from the "Won-Ton" garden
Imagine the horrors he sees
Fluffy and Fido with blood in their eyes
It makes him just drop to his knees
Kroc from MacDonalds is bracing himself
He is ready to make his retreat
But burgers and Big Mac's are not haunting him
Cause he uses more fillers than meat!!!!!