SONG CHALLENGE WINNER!

The Song Challenge:  To write a song about the following (true) news story -- The cops get a call from a woman telling them to arrest her husband, who's in a motel room with another woman. They tell her that although what he's doing is immoral, it's not illegal. Then she tells them that the husband has a warrant out for his arrest. They check it out, and sure enough, it's true. The cops go to the motel and knock on the door. The man goes out the back window and starts to shimmy down a galvanized pipe -- not bothering to put on his clothes! The officer at the bottom of pipe shouts for the fella to come down. The man looks at the officer and says, 'Who? Me?', and the officer says 'How many naked guys on pipes do you think I'm talking to?"


The Bare-Nuts Escapee by SharonA
(Tune: "The Bare Necessities" from Walt Disney's THE JUNGLE BOOK [animated version])

SharonA's Comments:  As promised in the "Paw Paw" thread, I'm here to post my parody of yet another Disney song...


"Look for the bare-nuts escapee, the simply bare-nuts escapee.
Go get him out of her, please," said his wife.
"That mean ol' bare-nuts escapee � another woman's refugee �
So bring that bare-nuts escapee some strife!"

Whenever I ponder
My weird 911's
The man with no onder-
-wear on his buns
Would be a puzzlin' case, you see.
I took the call at 12:03...
"Would you look in Motel Six? My Lance
There takes his 'nancy'. If Lance's pants
In A-3 lie, it's true
The bare-nuts escapee will likely be there, too.
He'll be there, too.

"Look for the bare-nuts escapee, the simply bare-nuts escapee.
Go get him out of her, please," said his wife.
"That mean ol' bare-nuts escapee � he's lyin' there (her 'guest', you see)! �
Adjust that bare-nuts escapee's love-life!"

"Now, don't you pick the law, maw,"
To the prickly dear
I said. "Pricks we saw raw,
But let's try 'n' be clear.
Don't stick the prick, who cheats there, with the law."
"When you pick out where his arrest you saw,
Then you will heed this news from 'maw'.
When you pick, and stare at, the big law wa-
-rrant that's issued for him, too,
The bare-nuts escapee won't like it when you do
What you will do."

(instrumental law-break)

So then I got the facts: yeah, fool has got a record five blocks wide.
Now let me tell the dumb thing: little bitch is
In the act with the blue-jackets (uh-huh)
Door-knockin' outside!
They don't spend much time lookin' around
For out on a pipe he can be found
With his hind out in the wind, without
Any clothing on, just clingin' and shoutin':
"Zat me you're talkin' to??"
"Well, bare-nuts escapee, it's likely to be you,"
They said, "Yes, you!!!"

"Lock up that bare-nuts escapee, the simple bare-nuts escapee.
Go get him down from there. Please tell his wife:
"Your mean ol' bare-nuts escapee is in our care! So, rest; be free
Without that bare-nuts escapee for life!
Without that bare-nuts escapee for life!"
(Yeah, man!)

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