SONG CHALLENGE WINNER!

The Song Challenge:   Who Left Uncle Harry In The Bushes? July 6, 2000 - Fort Worth, Texas: Maintenance worker John Truex was minding his own business as he walked the grounds of the Woodhill Apartments on Monday, when he spied an odd-looking wooden box under a bush. "He had no idea what it was," said the manager of the complex. "It looked like a little coffin."  Truex took the box to the apartment office to show the manager and other staff members what he found. Curious, the group opened the lid and discovered a sealed brass box inside. They couldn't open the brass box, and couldn't figure out what it was, so they called the police. Office r W.T. Byrnes arrived at the scene and was just as stumped by the 1-foot-long by 4-inch-wide box, which seemed to be missing a display plate. "I wasn't real sure what it was," Byrnes said. "I called funeral homes in the area and they said, 'Yes, we package things like that,' and I said, 'Eeeeyew!'"  "According to a couple of funeral homes," continued Officer Byrnes, "they take ashes, put them in a plastic bag with a label of who it is and then put them in a box that they seal up and then put in a display case." Byrnes turned the little box over to the Medical Examiner's Office; however, the staff members there declined to comment yesterday. The statement from spokeswoman Linda Anderson was, "As it stands right now, we don't have any information on it -- All we have is a box."  But the apartment manager has heard otherwise. "It's an urn of some sort," she said. "The medical examiner's office found out that it is a lady from Granbury, but they haven't contacted any relatives. But I'm sure when a person finds out that their relative was left here, we will be hearing from them . . . (but) you've got to wonder who would leave Uncle Harry under a bush . . . .". 

Aunt Edna, Where Have You Gone? by Áine
(Tune: Oh Lord Won't You Buy Me A Mercedes Benz) 

Aunt Edna, Aunt Edna, where have you gone?
We're movin' and the furniture is out on the lawn,
I looked for your brass urn from dusk until dawn,
Aunt Edna, Aunt Edna, where have you gone?

Aunt Edna, Aunt Edna, oh where could you be?
I looked under the kitchen sink, I even climbed a tree,
Just rattle your bones, dear, if you can hear me,
Aunt Edna, Aunt Edna, oh where could you be?

Aunt Edna, you're a prankster, dead or alive,
You were always the cat's pajamas, hip to the jive,
Please, Auntie, quit hidin', it's givin' me the hives,
Aunt Edna, you're a prankster, dead or alive,

Aunt Edna, I'm sorry that we got evicted,
But the welfare check got lost and Bubba got convicted,
Do I look for you or skip town? Oh I'm so conflicted!
Aunt Edna, I'm sorry that we got evicted,

Aunt Edna, thank heavens, I just found your box,
I remember now, I put it in one of Bubba's socks,
And threw it out the window when the super changed the locks,
Aunt Edna, thank heavens, I just found your box!

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