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SONG CHALLENGE WINNER!
The Song Challenge:
Here's a little story that Amos sent
in for your 'songifying' enjoyment -- He calls it: "If I Gave Myself
To You . . ." COLOMBO (Reuters) - A Sri Lankan man was seriously
injured when he jumped naked into a lions' den at the national zoo, apparently
offering himself up as a feast for the big cats, officials said Monday.
"The man...had written a letter before jumping into the enclosure saying he
wanted to give 'alms' to the lions," said Senarath Gunasena, director of
the National Zoological Gardens in the Colombo suburb of Dehiwala. The man
survived but the three lions in the den bit off parts of his arms, legs, chest
and groin area. The incident occurred Sunday when the zoo was full of
visitors. The man was rescued by zoo staff and onlookers who beat garbage
cans to frighten the lions away and took him to a nearby hospital where he was
in intensive care. Sri Lanka's majority Buddhist population believes that giving
alms can earn merit for future incarnations.
At the Zoo by mousethief
(Tune: "At the Zoo" by Paul Simon)
Chorus:
Someone told me "you'll earn karma points at the zoo."
I do believe it. I do believe it's true.
Mmmmm... (etc)
It's a lifetime losing karma points that drove me to the park
Now I'm gonna take a gamble at the zoo
I'll jump into the lion's cage and give them alms and legs
And the animals will love it if I do
(If I do now...)
(repeat chorus)
The monkeys watch me walk on by,
They think I'm insincere,
And the elephants all kinda think I'm dumb
Orangutans are skeptical of karma-seeking fanatics
And the zookeepers will have to sweep my bum
The zebras called the actuaries
The antelopes, the missionaries
The pigeons flocked to see me scream
But the lions licked their lips at me
Oh my ass! now they're chewing me at the zoo...
At the zoo....
© 2000 Alex Riggle. All Rights Reserved. Etc.