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SONG CHALLENGE WINNER!
The Song Challenge:
This idea was suggested by our own DaveO,
and many thanks to him for it! And for your efforts this time, a special Golden
Cow Chip with Sorcha's Gilded Feblueberry Award has been designed. Comin'
In On A Hoof And A Prayer -- Early in 1997, the dazed crew of a Japanese Trawler
was plucked out of the Sea of Japan clinging to the wreckage of their sunken
ship. Their rescue, however, was followed by immediate imprisonment once
authorities questioned the sailors on their ship's loss. To a man they claimed
that a cow, falling out of a clear blue sky, had struck the trawler amidships,
shattering its hull and sinking the vessel within minutes. They remained
in prison for several weeks, until the Russian Air Force reluctantly informed
Japanese authorities that the crew of one of its cargo planes had apparently
stolen a cow wandering at the edge of a Siberian airfield, forced the cow into
the plane's hold, and hastily taken off for home. Unprepared for live
cargo, the Russian crew was ill-equipped to manage a now rampaging cow within
its hold. To save the aircraft and themselves, they shoved the animal out of the
cargo hold as they crossed the Sea of Japan at an altitude of 30,000 feet.
Americow Pie by Dharmabum
(Sung to, you guessed it, American Pie by Don McLean)
Long Long time ago
I can still remember
When livestock didn't fly
But I knew if they got airborne
That all mankind should be warned
Bout' pigs and cows flying overhead
They pose a danger to our species
We could get hit with flying feces
Imagine my surprise
When I saw the friendly skies
I tried to run, I tried to flee
But Bossie's headed right for me
This may cause my fatality
The day the heifer flied.
Chorus:
So bye bye Miss Americow Pie
Now I'm floating in the ocean
And I wish I was dry
The Russians sent a bovine
Sailing outta the sky
And I hope this ain't the day that I die
I hope this ain't the day that I die.
We fishermen are a hearty crew
We've done it all and seen a thing or two
But this one took us by surprise
I was standing there fishing off the bow
When I looked up and saw a flying cow
I could hardly believe my eyes
So come on Chin be nimble Chin be fast
Or this day might just be your last
Ol' Bossie hit the deck
Turned that trawler to a wreck
I saw that boat sink to the reef
When it was hit by that ton of beef
As I watched in disbelief
The day that heifer flied.
(Chorus)
We got locked up in the hoosegow
When we told the cops of our flying cow
They just smiled and turned away
"We are doomed", I was afraid
For the "surf and turf" that we had made
But the judge said that the Russians had confessed
Then in the streets I heard the scream
And from the sky fell sour cream
Then we all had to laugh
When it rained half and half
Now there's two things that I fear the most
That's Russian planes and Bossie's ghost
I'm heading inland from the coast
Now ...that...heifers....fly
Final Chorus:
So bye bye Miss Americow Pie
I'm floating in the ocean
And I wish I was dry
The Russians sent a bovine
Sailing outta the sky
And I hope this ain't the day that I die
I hope this ain't the day that I die.