SONG CHALLENGE WINNER!

The Song Challenge:   When Pigs Fly OR Never Say Never Again (Philadelphia PA) In a bizarre episode that rattled flight attendants and embarrassed airline officials, a 300-pound pig was put in the first-class cabin of a US Airways Boeing 757 and flown with 200 other passengers on a nonstop six-hour flight across the country from Philadelphia to Seattle. All went well, for most of the flight.  Somehow, the pig's owners, described as two women, one in her 30s, the other a senior citizen, convinced the airline that it was a "therapeutic companion pet," like a guide dog for the blind.  "I guess it was supposed to be a Seeing Eye pig," a witness aboard the flight said. "Frankly, I couldn't tell what kind of therapeutic service it was providing. All I know is, it was ugly, and it pooped."  A chagrined airline spokesman provided few details. "We can confirm that the pig traveled, and we can confirm that it will never happen again," US Airways spokesman David Castelveter said. "Let me stress that. It will never happen again."  An internal report said the owners said they had a doctor's note that required them to fly with the animal, and that they described pig as weighing only 13 pounds, so based on this info, authorization was given," the report said. Witnesses said the pig's owners exhibited no obvious impairments.  "I'd estimate 300 pounds," one source aboard the flight said. "It took four people to wheel it in, past security and to the gate. And they were struggling."  Though flight attendants objected, the pig was cleared for takeoff and seated on the floor, in the first row of first class. It was so big, much of its bulk extended into the aisle, according to the report.  "It didn't smell; it was a clean pig," a witness on the flight said. "It slept almost the whole time."  Few passengers complained. It wasn't till the aircraft taxied into Seattle that the pig wreaked havoc.  Squealing loudly, it ran loose through the aircraft and tried to enter the cockpit. It finally found refuge in the food galley, where it refused to budge.  Finally, the pig was lured from the galley with food.  Then, the owners -- struggling to control the pig -- dragged it out of the aircraft and into the Jetway.  That's where it left its mess.  "Another passenger on the flight advised pig owner that she picked up her pig's feces and she was not happy about that," the report stated.  "Once the pig was off aircraft, another passenger had to push while the two women pulled to get it in the elevator. "The whole time, the pig was squealing so loudly everyone in the terminal heard it."  Federal Aviation Administration officials in Seattle said they were unfamiliar with the incident, but said they would investigate.


A Cold Day In Hell by MMario

MMario's Comments:  Sometimes a challenge just wants to go in some other direction...I'm not sure what direction this one took, but here it is...

The weather report in Hades;
is bleak and gettin' colder
Though there's no frost as cold, they say
as the frost upon her shoulder

But when she sings
My heart takes wing
and she makes me more then I am
There is so much more to life, my friend
Then that which meets the eye
They said 'twould never happen
But indeed, this "pig" can fly!

When I was young, what met the eye
was most important to me
Unless, of course, the "rep" perforce
was "easy, cheap and free"

But when she sings
My heart takes wing
and she makes me more then I am
There is so much more to life, my friend
Then that which meets the eye
They said 'twould never happen
But indeed, this "pig" can fly!

And it doesn't even matter
that her notes are flat and flatter
because the beauty overcomes
what would make a chalkboard shatter

But when she sings
My heart takes wing
and she makes me more then I am
There is so much more to life, my friend
Then that which meets the eye
They said 'twould never happen
But indeed, this "pig" can fly!

I haven't even met her, she doesn't know my name
But she sings my heart to flyin' all the same
And I'll pass along the beauty, if I can
For her song has turned this boy into a man

But when she sings
My heart takes wing
and she makes me more then I am
There is so much more to life, my friend
Then that which meets the eye
They said 'twould never happen
But indeed, this "pig" can fly!

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