Dear Dr. Feeder Archive

 

Dr. Feeder has devoted much time to studying Feeders, Feedees and weight-gain in general. He has generously agreed to share his vast wisdom with those who have questions on these topics or who need advice. If you have a question for Dr. Feeder, write him at [email protected].

 

Funny You Should Ask...

November 27, 2000

 

Dear Dr. Feeder,
          I've been going out with a girl for 2 months. She's really skinny but other than that she's great. What is the best way to bring up weight gain with her? --Jump

 

Dear Jump,
          Next time you're about to make love, ask her what her sexual fantasy is. Press her on it, get all the details you can from her. Help her realize the fantasy. If that's not practical, maybe you can help her act it out.
          Eventually she'll ask you what your fantasy is.
          Tell her.
-- Dr. Feeder

 

Birthday Present

November 20, 2000

Dear Dr. Feeder,
         When I first met my wife-to-be in high school, she weighed only 105 pounds.
After being married for about a year, I finally confessed to my wife that I was sexually stimulated by fat women, and thoughts of people gaining weight.  I also admitted to her that it was my desire that she gain weight.
        As you might imagine, she was shocked by these revelations.
        But, to her credit, she did try to accommodate me as best she could by occasionally overeating for my benefit.
        With the overeating, and two pregnancies, she did add a few pounds to her  body, but an active metabolism and societal pressures always kept her from gaining as much weight as I would have liked.
   
     But then a wonderful thing happened for my birthday this past October.  When I opened the card from my wife it read, "For your birthday I will gain 10 pounds."
        True to her words, she started eating and gained 5 pounds in 3 weeks.
        But then the other night, she dropped a bombshell on me when she told me that she did not want to gain anymore weight right now.
        We will be going on a 2 week vacation to Mexico at the end of this year, and she is concerned about how she is going to look in a bathing suit.

        I pouted, and acted like a child who was just told that he wasn�t getting the present that he wanted for his birthday.
        We talked more about it, later that evening in bed, and she told me that I had no reason to be disappointed, because she said that after we get back from our vacation, she would gain some more weight for me.
        That made me feel a bit better, but I am afraid that after the vacation she may change her mind.  And besides, I want my birthday present now!

        So, I would love to sabotage her plan.  Or change her mind, Or do something to get her back "on track".
Do you have any suggestions?--Max

Dear Max,
        Yes. Chill out!
        Here's a woman who's going to schlep around an extra ten pounds of fat--maybe for the rest of her life--just for your pleasure and you're complaining? Take her at her word. Trying to pressure her, trick her, or manipulate her could backfire big time. Resentment over your fussing may just strengthen her resolve to keep her weight down.
        If you apologize to her for being such a baby, and tell her to take her time, Dr. Feeder will allow you to perform a few very subtle tricks. Remember, people often gain weight on vacation without trying (especially if it hasn't become a big issue). Obviously, take her to restaurants that serve huge portions. Eat very slowly, and keep her talking a lot. The longer you keep her at the table, the more she'll eat. If you socialize with other couples, make sure the the woman is bigger than your wife.
        However, if these tricks don't work, be a grownup about it. Positive reinforcement when she does gain will always work better than negativity when she doesn't.
        Above all, don't get her angry. You want more birthday presents like the last one, don't you? And remember, Christmas is coming!

 

Crazy Not to Diet?

November 5, 2000

Dear Dr. Feeder,

When I got a job and got my own place, I didn't plan to gain weight. I just started eating whatever I felt like. I knew I was eating a lot more fattening stuff than you're supposed to, and I figured I'd probably gain a few pounds, but I didn't really worry about it�I was having too much fun. I figured I could always diet if I got too fat.    

Anyway, before I knew it I gained 30 pounds! The funny thing is, I really like the extra weight. It's very sexy somehow. The last thing I want to do is diet.

My boyfriend left me because I wouldn't diet. I was sad at first but then I realized I had more freedom to eat with him gone, and then I was happy!

Everyone tells me I'm crazy, I should go on a diet, or at least cut back so I don't gain any more. What do you think?

--Constant Eater

Dear Constant Eater, 

Eat all you want. Get as fat as you want.

--Dr. Feeder

Dear Dr. Feeder,

My boyfriend has been fattening me up for a couple of years, and I'm up to 240 pounds. My problem is my thighs are so fat that they rub togetherwalking is becoming uncomfortable. Should I stop gaining before it gets worse? My boyfriend doesn't want me to, but he says he'll abide by your decision.

--Chubby Thighs

Dear Chubby Thighs,

You need to gain more weight. When your thighs are fat enough, they'll just roll around as you walk.

--Dr. Feeder

Dear Dr. Feeder,

Since I moved in with my boyfriend three months ago, I've gained twenty pounds. He's always taking me out to dinner and buying me fattening things to eat, and I can't help but gain weight. I weigh 160 pounds now.

I've asked him to help me cut back on my food intake, but he says it's all right if I gain weight, because he's a Feeder. Why does that make it all right? He told me to ask you, he said you could explain it.

--Gaining

Dear Gaining,

It makes it all right for him, because there's nothing he wants more than a girlfriend who is gaining weight.

That doesn't make it all right for you, though, unless fear of being without a boyfriend is the only reason you want to keep your weight down. It's only all right for you if you want to gain weight, or at least, don't mind gaining weight.

You seem pretty tentative about what you want to do though, or you wouldn't even have sent me that letter. I'd say you should gain another twenty pounds on purpose, so you get the full Feeding experience. If you like it, get that guy to marry you and get as fat as you want.

--Dr. Feeder

Dear Dr. Feeder,

After much cajoling, I finally got my girlfriend to agree to gain weight. But she's been trying for three months now, and it's not working! She gained about 5 pounds the first month, but since then, I haven't had any luck.

Any advice? I'd like her to gain at least 50 pounds.

--Frustrated

Dear Frustrated,

Send her to me, I'll fatten her up.

--Dr. Feeder

Erogenous Bellies

November 1, 2000

Dear Dr.  Feeder,
        My belly is the most erogenous part of my body.  When my mate touches it I go wild.  Is it possible to have a belly orgasm?  Thanks. --Anne

Dear Anne:
        I know that quadriplegics with no feeling in their genitals can sometimes learn to make another part of their body (the neck, for example) erogenous. So it seems possible that someone could do the same thing with his or her belly.
        Perhaps other readers have experience with this. Please write me. --Dr. Feeder

Dear Dr. Feeder,
        I weigh 220 pounds, 80 more than when I got married. I love it, but unfortunately my husband hates it. What can I do?
--Love to Eat

 

Dear Love to Eat,


If preserving your marriage is your top priority, you should try not to gain anymore.
However, if eating and gaining are more important to you than your marriage, just eat as much as you want. Your marriage may survive anyway. Even a man who prefers slender women will often stay with a fat wife. Just don't let him know you're gaining on purpose, and don't eat too much in front of him�you don't want to cause unnecessary aggravation. If he divorces you because you're too fat, make sure you get a good lawyer and get all the money out of him you can.

Bon appetit!

--Dr. Feeder

 

Dear Dr. Feeder,

I've been fattening up my girlfriend for several months. She now weighs 192 pounds, up 45 pounds since we got together. And she's still gaining! It's wonderful.

The problem is, she's getting very lazy. She quit her job last month and won't look for another one. She hardly does any housework, and expects me to wait on her every time she wants a snack. This is getting pretty tough on me, what should I do?

--Worn Out

Dear Worn Out:

Grow up.

It's not her fault. She's lazy because you've spoiled her. If you want her less lazy, stop Feeding her, waiting on her, and doing the housework. Let her know she needs to get a job.

But you don't want that, do you? You want to fatten her up even more. Keep spoiling her. Consider hiring a maid to help with the housework. If you can't afford that, get a better job.

No one said being a Feeder is easy.

--Dr. Feeder

Lose Guilt, Gain Pounds

October 31, 2000

Dear Dr. Feeder,

I'm a 29-year old married woman. My husband wants me to gain weight, but every time I try, I feel awful about myself. I've been slim my whole life, about 125 pounds, 5'7� tall, and I feel incredibly guilty if I gain much weight at all.

My husband is very understanding about it, but I know he'd really like it if I were heavier. To make things worse, I kind of got him to marry me by promising that I'd gain weight if we got married. What can I do?

--Skinny Sara

Dear Sara:

The reason people usually feel guilty when they gain weight is because they believe they ought to be thin, and they regard weight-gain as a sign of failure and weakness. You are obviously still stuck in this mindframe.

The thing to do is to set yourself a goal, just as if you were dieting to lose weight. Make a decision to get up to say, 140 pounds. Announce your goal to your husband and ask him to encourage you. Once you commit to gaining the weight, you won't feel like a failure when you gain�you'll feel like a success. The guilt will disappear.

--Dr. Feeder

 

Dear Dr. Feeder,

My boyfriend is a feeder and has been fattening me up for over a year now. I've gained over fifty pounds, and I love it.

But my mother hates it, and gives me a hard time every time I see her. I can't bear to tell her the real reason I'm gaining weight what should I do?

--Fat Daughter

Dear Daughter:

First tell your mother that you realize she is nagging you because she loves you and is trying to help. Thank her for that, but explain that she is not helping. Dieting doesn't work for you and just makes you fatter. Also inform her that her nagging just stresses you out and makes you eat more. After that, eat something every time she nags you. If this requires carrying around a stash of candy bars in your purse, so be it.

If she still nags you after that, just inform her that though you love her, you refuse to be nagged and won't see her until she learns to accept you the way you are.

--Dr. Feeder

Dear Dr. Feeder,

I'm a 22-year old SWM and a wannabe feeder. The trouble is, I can't find a woman to feedthe feedees I've met on-line are usually much older and already very fatI'd really like to find one my own age who I could fatten from scratch. Can you help me?

--Feeder Wannabe

Dear Wannabe:

Sure, I can help, but the solution is not easy. What you have to do is to come out of the closet.

I don't mean you should walk down the street with a neon sign on your head, but if the subject comes up in conversation, tell your friends what your interests are. You may get some strange reactions, but on the positive side, the fact that you are a Feeder will travel around on the grapevine. Eventually, some feedee-wannabe may hear about you.

If you post a personal ad, post it in the regular newspapers and on-line dating services, not the Feeder/Feedee ones. Explain very clearly what you are interested in. As you pointed out, the on-line Feedees are usually already quite fat. You want to find the wannabes, the closet Feedees who may not even have heard of Feeding before. When they read your ad, it will be a revelation to them.

Good luck!

--Dr. Feeder

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