Copyright 2000, Susan S. McCrackin  Reprinted with permission of the author.

The Doctor was rocking a sleeping Kathryn B’Elanna. B’Elanna was moving around the treatment room, examining the consoles, trying to find anything that would give them a way to contact Voyager. 

"Please don’t touch anything that will alert Barrat." The Doctor’s voice was pleading.

"Don’t worry." Her eyes glanced back at the belt around the child’s waist. "I am just looking." She sighed deeply and turned her attention back to him, "Well, the one hundredth look didn’t tell me anything different from the first ninety-nine." She sat down, disheartened, her eyes locked on the belt around the child’s waist. "What kind of people are we dealing with that would do that to a child?" Her voice was angry and frustrated. The Doctor looked at her but did not respond. She sat, silent. Finally, she looked at him, "Are you okay?"

He looked at the child in his arms and saw the face of his wife in it. "Oh, I’d say I’m doing just fine. My wife might be dead. My child is to be bartered as am I. I’d say life is really looking up for me right now."

She looked away. He was angry and she could understand that. She didn’t even mind that he was taking his anger out on her. After a moment, she heard him.

"I’m sorry. That was uncalled for."

"You don’t have to apologize."

"Yes, I do. It’s just that…." He paused, "I feel so helpless."

"I know. So do I."

He looked down at Kathryn B’Elanna, "What kind of father can’t even protect his own child." He looked up at B’Elanna, "I am a computer program. I am not a real man. What made me think I could ever be a real father to her?"

"Doctor," B’Elanna’s face was compassionate, "you are a good father. You are more father than a lot of men are." She reached to touch his arm, "We are going to find a way out of this. And don’t you dare give up on the Captain. If there is a way to find us, she will do it."

He gave her an appreciative look but she knew she had not convinced him. "Doctor, we need to try to come up with a plan of some kind."

"Do you have anything in mind?"

"Not really." She looked at the belt again, "That thing puts a halt to everything I have been able to think of."

"I know. Me, too." He fell silent again. She knew what he was thinking. "Do you really think she is dead?"

She gave herself a moment, "I don’t know. But you need to face the fact that it is a possibility. And if she is, you are all Kathryn B’Elanna has left."

His eyes widened in shock at her words. Then, she saw them harden. That, she knew, reached him. 

She got up and walked around the room again, her eyes searching again for anything she had missed before. The technology in this room was rather simple for a sickbay. Or, treatment room as they called it. They had been in this room for at least four days. Periodically, the doors would open slightly and food would be pushed in. It was barely enough for Kathryn B’Elanna much less herself. They were fortunate the Doctor did not eat although she was starting to be concerned for the battery of his mobile emitter. He usually left it on the charging pad when he was in his Sickbay. Neither one of them knew how long it would last without recharging. She was looking for something she could use to recharge his battery when she heard him whisper to her.

"B’Elanna."

She turned to him.

"Do you think we are being monitored?"

"I’m not sure."

He did not respond so she continued her walk around the room, then moved to sit down next to him, adjusting Kathryn B’Elanna’s shirt. 

"Why?" She spoke softly, her head down.

"I have an idea."

"What?"

"The ventilator system."

"What about it."

"When I replenished the medical supplies, I added some generic vaccines to their supply. I might be able to modify them and inject them into the ventilator system. We might be able to create a need for my services that will give us an opportunity to escape. If we’re lucky, maybe we can make them all sick enough to die."

She was surprised at the vehemence in his voice. "What about Kathryn B’Elanna?"

"I could vaccinate her. I could vaccinate you, also. The two of you would be protected."

"That’s a great idea, Doctor." She allowed her eyes to lazily move around the room, "I’ll see if I can figure out if there are monitors of some kind in here."

"I’ll start seeing what I can come up with. Maybe some good earth virus will do. You should be immune from most of those." He laughed lightly, "If this works, I will never rail against science not being able to win the war against viruses."

She picked up a small bottle of water she had left from her dinner, "Well, here’s to poor health, Doctor."

"Try increasing the angularity of the beam."

She was walking around the cabin of the Delta Flier, rubbing the back of her neck. They had taken the Flier and three shuttles and had formed an arc around Voyager, using their scanners together with Voyager’s to enhance their scanning capability. Five days of almost round the clock searching had turned up nothing. Faces that had been hopeful three days ago were now starting to look hopeless.

Five days. They could be anywhere in the quadrant.

"Anything, Harry?"

"No, Captain. Nothing." He looked back at her from his position on the bridge.

She closed her eyes, trying desperately to think of anything she had not already thought of. She opened her eyes, then opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out. She had run out of ideas.

"Captain?" Chakotay stood up from his seat on the bridge and walked toward the view screen

"Yes, Chakotay?"

"Captain," he hesitated, "I think you need to come back." He paused, "Seven…."

He didn’t finish. "I’m on my way. Janeway out." She walked up to sit next to Tuvok who was piloting the Flier, "Just get within transporter range. I’ll transport to Voyager and you can stay with the shuttles and keep searching."

"Do you think we are doing any good?"

"No, I don’t. But I don’t know what else to do and I am not ready to give up. What about you?"

"I am not ready to give up yet, either." His eyes searched the scans in front of him for any indication of the ship they were searching for.

"Send out a sub-space signal for the Omarahns again."

"Do you really think they can help us?"

"I don’t have a clue. It is probably just another act of desperation." She snorted, "At least it is another act."

He turned to her, "We are within transporter range."

She got up and took her place.

"Beginning transport."

As soon as she materialized, she stepped down from the transporter platform and walked quickly toward the door. She met Chakotay as the doors opened. He turned to fall into step with her.

"She’s in bad shape, Captain. Tom says she needs to regenerate. But she won’t listen to him. We haven’t been able to get her to leave Astrometrics. The good news is, she has enhance scanning capabilities by almost fifty percent."

She tossed him a look, "I’m not certain I want to know how she did that."

"Trust me. You don’t. Let’s suffice it to say she has dismantled one of the alcoves in Cargo Bay Two. Astrometrics looks a little different than the last time you saw it."

They reached the doors of the Astrometrics Lab and she indicated to him she would enter alone. She started forward when he grabbed her arm.

"Be careful."

She looked at him a little surprised, then nodded. She pulled herself up straight, took a breath and entered.

The lights in the Astrometrics were dimmed and the air had a green hue. Janeway’s skin started to crawl. Astrometrics looked like the interior of a Borg cube. Seven had done quite a remodeling job. The console was larger than it had been and she could tell that multiple diagnostics were running on it. She swallowed hard and moved slowly forward.

"Hello, Seven."

"Captain." She did not look up from her work.

"It looks different in here."

"I have improved the efficiency of the scanners."

"I imagine you have." She walked up to stand next to Seven. She noticed how sallow her skin was.

"Have you rested, Seven?"

"I do not need to rest."

"I think you do. Tom says you need to regenerate. Why don’t you go regenerate for a little while and I will run the scanners here for you."

"I do not need to regenerate."

"Seven," she reached and put her hand on Seven’s arm. Her next words fell silent as Seven turned to her and she saw the wild look in her eyes.

"Remove your hand." The voice was cold, emotionless.

Janeway pulled her hand away and stepped back. Seven just looked back down at the console and returned to her work. Janeway watched her, feeling her heart thumping in her chest. Slowly, she backed away from her, turned and walked quickly from the Astrometrics Lab. As soon as the doors closed behind her, she took a deep breath. She looked at Chakotay, "You weren’t kidding." She reached up and tapped her combadge, "Janeway to Kim."

"Yes, Captain."

"Harry, bring a security force down to Astrometrics."

"What?"

"And have Tom bring some heavy tranquilizers."

"We are on our way."

It only took a few minutes for them to assemble outside the doors. Before she could give them the order to go in for Seven, Harry stepped forward.

"Captain, let me try first."

"Harry, it isn’t safe. Seven is over the edge."

"Please, Captain. Give me five minutes."

She stood, indecisive. She really did not want to send in security to take Seven by force but she was reluctant to put Harry at risk.

"I won’t get close to her. I won’t touch her. I just want to talk to her. If it even looks like she is thinking about coming for me, I’ll yell. Please."

Reluctantly, she nodded and he turned and entered Astrometrics before she could change her mind.

He walked along the side of the Lab and walked up the steps to the platform and squatted down in front of her. She did not even look at him.

He kept his voice soft, "Seven, look at me."

She kept her head down, her hands flying over the console.

"Please."

Slowly, she raised her head, "I am busy."

Her eyes were wild, her look stone cold, her voice emotionless. Harry gave her a small smile. "I know you are busy. I know you are doing everything you can to find the Doctor and Kathryn B’Elanna. But, Seven, you need to regenerate. You have to take care of yourself. You have to do that for them."

"If I do not find them, there is no them."

"I know. We are working to find them, also." He inched closer to her, "Seven, you have looked inside my mind. You know how I feel about you. You know I would never do anything to hurt you. You know I only want your happiness. And you know I would never lie to you. Listen to me. You need to regenerate. You are risking your life. You need to do this so you will be here when we get them back. They will need you here, strong for them." He saw her look soften, "Please, let me take you to your alcove to regenerate. I will link these scans to your console in the Cargo Bay and while you regenerate, I will keep your work going. If I find anything, I will wake you immediately. Eight hours, Seven. Just regenerate for eight hours and I will be with you the entire time, doing the work for you. I promise."

He watched as her body seem to slump and he slowly rose, maintaining eye contact with her and moved down from the platform. He reached out his hand to her and she slowly raised hers to take it. He kept talking to her, softly and encouragingly and put his arm around her and led her out of Astrometrics. The group in the corridor backed up to allow them to move past and Harry half led- half carried her toward the turbolift that would take them to the Cargo Bay.

"I think I have a workable bug."

"Good. Is it deadly?"

"I don’t really know. It is possible."

"Do you have a vaccine?"

"Not yet. I can probably have one in about six hours."

They were keeping their voices low. B’Elanna had not been able to find any signs of monitoring devices but they were being cautious. B’Elanna glanced over at Kathryn B’Elanna who was napping on one of the cots. The child had been sleeping a lot the last few days and both the Doctor and she were getting concerned about her. She had cried for the first three days they had been on the ship. She would call for her mother over and over. B’Elanna thought it was the most heartbreaking thing she had ever experienced. No amount of consoling would stop her. She wondered what Kathryn B’Elanna had seen. The Doctor had quit talking about Seven. He did not even want B’Elanna to mention her name, especially not around Kathryn B’Elanna. Just hearing Seven’s name would cause her to start crying again. 

Her eyes went to the belt around the child again. She longed to get her hands on Barrat. Once again, she wondered about someone who would do such a thing to a child. It was taking all of her strength to hold back her anger but she knew she did not have a choice. To do anything else would put KB’s life at greater risk.

She knew they were running out of time. She could tell by the way their captors were treating them. Whatever their final destination, she knew they would be arriving soon.

"Doctor, how dangerous would it be to release the bug now, before you have a vaccine?"

He was surprised at her suggestion. He glanced back at his sleeping child and put his hand to his mouth. "It could be very dangerous. I might not be able to develop enough vaccine. Do we really want to release it if I can’t vaccinate you and Kathryn B’Elanna against it?"

She thought for a few minutes, "How quickly could you have a vaccine just for Kathryn B’Elanna?"

He stopped for a minute, then answered her, "I could probably have enough for one in a couple of hours."

"Doctor, I think you’d better work on that vaccination." He just looked at her and she continued, "Doctor, I think we are running out of time. Work on one for Kathryn B’Elanna first, release the bug, then work on one for me. It is an earth virus. Odds are good I will be okay without it. Regardless, I don’t think we have time to wait."

He nodded and started to work. She watched him for a few minutes, "Were you able to engineer it so it will work quickly."

He glanced up at her, "Yes. It should start to work within a couple of hours after it is released."

Their eyes met and she nodded at him, confidently, "Good."

Ketaria sat up straight in her bed. Kahkar reached for her.

"What is it?"

"I just had the strangest feeling."

"Like what?"

"Like," she stopped, searching for the right words, "like someone walking through my dreams." Kahkar waited on her to continue. "It was so…unfocused and vague but there was a presence there." She fell silent and he could tell she was trying to sort out her experience. 

"Perhaps you should meditate. It might help you focus and connect with whatever it is you are feeling."

She nodded, but sat quietly for a few minutes. Then, she turned to him, "Something is wrong. I know it. But I don’t have a clue as to what it is."

With that, she slid from their bed, pulled on her robe and walked out of their bedroom. He watched her with concern written on his face. He searched his own feelings, then pushed back the covers and swung his legs to the floor. His wife would turn inside herself to seek out the answers. He would turn to his science. 

Dressing quickly, he left for his lab.

The Doctor pressed the hypospray against Kathryn B’Elanna’s neck and administered the vaccine. Then, he turned to look at B’Elanna, picked up the second hypospray he had prepared, walked over and injected it into the ventilation system. Giving her another look, he immediately turned to prepare another dose of the vaccine for B’Elanna.

She took a deep breath, trying not to breathe too deeply. She walked over to where KB was sleeping and sat down on the cot next to her. The child had slept most of the last twenty-four hours. B’Elanna wondered if she were suffering from depression. It might explain her sleep patterns. 

She knew KB had seen what happened with her mother. Even more, she knew the child would have felt whatever it was her mother had felt. Fear. Pain. Panic. All of it. She wondered if she felt her die.

She reached out to adjust the blanket on the child when KB’s eyes opened and looked up at her.

"Bala." The voice was soft.

"Hello, sweetheart. Did you have a good sleep?"

"Mama?" 

"No, honey. Mama isn’t here right now. But I am and so is your daddy. We are here with you."

The child pushed herself up off the cot and B’Elanna took her in her arms, hugging her tightly. KB nestled in her arms, then looked up at her, "Mama hurt." 

B’Elanna thought her heart would break. She wanted to say something comforting to her but she would not lie to her. She couldn’t think of anything else to say so she just nodded her head, "Yes. Mama hurt."

KB looked away, and repeated herself, "Mama hurt." Then, she pushed herself out of B’Elanna’s arms, returned to the cot and quickly fell asleep. B’Elanna covered her with the blanket.

Barrat, she thought, I promise you, I am personally going to kill you.

Tom was scanning Seven as she regenerated. He looked over at Harry who was still running her searching scans from the Cargo Bay console. 

"Better, but still not good." He checked the time left, "Harry, she really needs to continue to regenerate. I would strongly recommend you not terminate her regeneration cycle."

"No, Tom. I promised her eight hours and only eight hours. I have to wake her up. I cannot afford to do anything to break her confidence in me right now."

Tom nodded. He knew Harry was right. He looked at Seven’s face. The bruises were still deeply colored. She had not allowed him to use the medical tricorder to heal the area. She wanted the bruises. He understood. He knew how he felt with B’Elanna on that ship; still, he could barely fathom what she must be feeling. The Doctor was a hologram and his ability to fight for himself was limited. It would be too easy to disrupt his program or damage his mobile emitter. And what could her child do to protect herself? Nothing. What he knew was hurting even more was knowing she had fought for her child and failed. If they did not get them back, he did not think she would ever recover.

He glanced at the clock and saw there was only a couple of minutes left in the cycle. He quickly scanned her again. "Harry, it would be good if you could manage to talk her into resting for a while longer. I would argue strongly for another regeneration cycle but I would settle for her eating and sleeping for a little while."

"I’ll try, Tom. But don’t expect too much." He concentrated on the scans, then looked at his friend, "I don’t think it would be a good idea if you mentioned anything about that to her. Let me handle it."

Tom’s look told him he understood what he was being told. The alarm sounded and Harry moved quickly to waken Seven.

Her eyes sought his as soon as they opened and he shook his head. Then, for the first time in almost a week, he saw the fight go out of her eyes and the look on her face slowly dissolve into absolute defeat, grief and loss. He watched as her body seem to go slack. With barely a glance at Tom, he took her hand, "Seven, you need to eat something. It would be good if you would also try to get a little more rest." He held his breath, waiting for her reaction. There wasn’t one so he continued. "Tom will stay here and keep running the scans. Why don’t we go back to your quarters and let you rest in your bed?" 

She didn’t respond so he slightly pulled her hand to pull her to him and she came without resistance. He put his arm around her back and helped her step down from her alcove. She didn’t fight him so he kept her moving toward the doors. "Tom," he called back over his shoulder, "we will be in Seven’s quarters. Please keep running the scans and call us the minute anything happens."

Tom did not respond. He knew Harry had spoken for Seven’s benefit. He turned off his medical tricorder and stepped down from the alcove, taking up Harry’s position at the console. He wasn’t certain why, but he started running the scans again.

Harry and Seven made their way slowly toward the turbolift. As soon as they approached it, the doors opened and Harry saw that Captain Janeway was inside. She backed against the wall and Harry and Seven entered. He spoke, "Deck nine." Seven did not seem to notice the Captain’s presence and Harry exchanged worried glances with her. Her eyes asked him if he needed her assistance and his told her he wasn’t sure. When the doors opened, he moved Seven forward and Janeway followed at a distance.

Once inside her living quarters, he moved to stand in front of her, making certain he had eye contact with her, "Seven, why don’t you take a sonic shower and we will fix you something to eat."

She nodded slightly at him but did not move. He looked over at Janeway and she moved forward, "I’ll help you with the shower and Harry can fix you a meal."

Immediately, the wild look returned to her eyes and Janeway moved back.

"No, Captain," Harry’s voice was soothing and he took Seven’s hand, "I’ll help her. You fix the meal."

"Ensign?" 

He turned and looked at Janeway, "It will be all right, Captain. I’ll take care of her."

She just looked at him, then reluctantly nodded her head, "I’ll fix her something to eat." As they started to move, she said, "Call me if you need me."

"We’ll be okay."

They moved through the bedroom and went into the bathroom. Harry quickly gathered a robe and a towel and placed them on a small chair near the sonic shower. "Okay, Seven, I’ll turn around and you go ahead and get in the shower. I’ll be here the entire time." He grinned at her, "Don’t worry, I won’t peek." With that, he turned his back on her. He waited, listening for her to move. Hearing nothing, he said, "Seven, are you getting in the shower?" When he did not get a response, he continued, "I don’t hear anything." He waited, "Seven, I’m going to turn around to check on you." When he still did not get a response, he slowly turned around, slightly closing his eyes as he did.

She was still standing there, not moving, her eyes staring blankly at nothing. He sighed. "Okay, Seven. I’ll help you." He moved to her, took his hand and lifted her face to force her to look in his eyes. "I am going to help you into the shower. But first, we have to get your clothes off. I am going to help you with that." She did not respond but he smiled at her and moved behind her to unzip her suit. At any moment, he expected her to stop him but she didn’t. She did not help him but stood still while he pulled her suit down her shoulders. Taking a deep breath and doing as much as he could to avert his eyes, he continued, managing to remove her garment and get her into the shower. 

It took him almost an hour to get her showered, her hair washed and dried and clothed. Finally, he took her by the hand and led her back into the living room. The Captain had the meal waiting on them. He took her over to the table and sat her down, "Okay, Seven, eat this."

She just looked at the food. Finally, he picked up the fork, put it in her hand and said, more forcibly, "Eat, Seven."

She took a bite, chewed slowly, swallowed and put the fork back down. Harry once again put the fork in her hand and instructed her to eat. She did. It took almost another hour to get her to finish the meal. Janeway was sitting across the room, her eyes moist with the pain of the picture she was seeing. 

Once the meal was finished, Harry once again took Seven by the hand and led her into the bedroom. He activated the regeneration mechanism and turned to tell her to get into the bed. He cut off his words, instead moving her to the side of the bed and pushing her down on it. Then, he laid her back and straightened her out, covering her with a nearby blanket. He pulled up a chair, sat down and took her hand.

"Go to sleep, Seven."

She closed her eyes. The Captain had been watching from the bedroom door. When she saw Seven’s eyes close, she walked up to put her hand on Harry’s shoulder. They exchanged sad, worried glances. Then, she patted his shoulder, turned and left.

Harry watched her sleep.

There was a dull headache starting behind her eyes. She started to say something to the Doctor, but decided against it. She decided it was a good thing. It meant the bug they had turned lose was working.

She looked over at Kathryn B’Elanna who was awake and sitting in what had become her spot in the treatment room. If she wasn’t asleep, she was sitting in that spot. The child who was normally so active and full of life and laughter was now still and quiet. It was as if she had turned completely inward, with no outward sign of emotion. Now, she not only looked like her mother, she was acting like her. Only her eyes show anything at all.

Suddenly, the doors opened and Barrat walked in. Two members of his crew followed him, their weapons trained on her.

"Doctor, we have a couple of sick crewmembers. You will treat them."

The Doctor looked at the man, then to his child and turned back to respond, "Of course."

Barrat grinned and motioned for the sick crewmembers to be brought in. They were placed on two of the beds and the Doctor started to scan them. B’Elanna did not move. Neither, she noticed, did Kathryn B’Elanna. Then, she heard the Doctor speak.

"Both of these men have very high fevers." He paused, looking Barrat in the eyes, "Have they been exposed to any contaminates?"

"None that I know of. Unless there was something on Voyager."

The Doctor allowed a glimmer of something to pass over his face, then tried to hide it, but not before he knew Barrat had seen it.

"Tell me!" When the Doctor did not respond, Barrat fingered his belt.

"There was a similar sickness on Voyager recently."

"Then you know how to treat it."

"I could, if we were on Voyager. But I do not have the equipment or medications I need here."

"How serious is the illness?"

"It can be fatal. We lost three crewmembers before I was able to develop a cure." For the first time, he saw the look on Barrat’s face waiver. Then, he saw as the look changed.

"Do the best you can." Barrat turned to leave. Suddenly, he stopped and turned to look at Kathryn B’Elanna.

B’Elanna noticed the look that passed between the small child and the big man. The look on the child’s face was one of absolute hate and the man’s one of fear. She watched as Barrat’s hand moved toward his belt, then stopped as if he was incapable of moving it. The room was frozen. Finally, Barrat stumbled backward, breaking his eye contact with the child, turned and quickly left the room.

B’Elanna gasped for air, her eyes locked on Kathryn B’Elanna who was now standing, staring at the doors that had closed behind Barrat. Then, she half walked, half crawled to the cot and patted it, indicating to B’Elanna that she wanted to be placed on it. B’Elanna walked to her, lifted and laid her down, covering her with the blanket. She fell asleep immediately.

B’Elanna turned to look at the Doctor and they shared shocked expressions. The Doctor moved to scan her, then looked at B’Elanna, "I have no idea what that was about."

B’Elanna was not certain, either. But she knew what had just happened was significant. She put the back of her hand to her forehead. She was starting to run a fever and her body was starting to ache. Her headache was getting worse. She was definitely sick

She only hoped Barrat felt worse than she did.

Ketaria was in her quiet place. She was in a small room, surrounded by special objects that enabled her to focus her thoughts when she wanted to meditate deeply. She had been in a quiet meditation for almost four hours. She was hunting for a deeper place than she had been in many years.

It was extreme that she would work this hard to go this deeply. But, for some reason, she felt it would take this intensity to understand what she was feeling. She was floating now, working to enter into this new place, open to whatever she would find.

Suddenly, she was aware of someone walking up behind her and she turned to see a very fuzzy figure moving surely toward her. She worked to go in deeper, giving the figure a chance to approach her with less difficulty and more clarity. Finally, the figure came into focus.

"Why, hello, Kathryn B’Elanna. Why have you come to me?" She allowed her peacefulness to flow to the child, to help her in this place.

The child looked at her, "Mama hurt."

Ketaria looked at her, "Your mother is hurt?"

"Bad man hurt Mama." She paused, looking solemnly up at Ketaria, "Help Mama."

"Of course. We will come help your mother. Can you tell me where she is?"

The child shook her head.

"Can you tell me where you are?"

"Bad man."

"You are with the bad man." The child nodded her head and Ketaria could see the anger in her face. "Where is your daddy?"

"Bad man."

"So you and your daddy are with the bad man?"

"Bala."

"B’Elanna is there, also?"

She nodded.

"Then they are taking good care of you."

She nodded slowly, then looked up at Ketaria, "Bala sick."

Ketaria smiled at her, "Kathryn B’Elanna, we are coming to you immediately. Can you stay with me in this place?"

"No. Bala. Dada."

"Okay. You go back to your father and your Aunt B’Elanna. We will be there as soon as we can."

The child turned to move away, then looked back. For the first time, her voice broke as she spoke, "Mama hurt." Then, she left.

Ketaria watched until the figure disappeared, then worked to bring herself out of the place they had been.

As soon as she was aware, she ran from the room. She almost collided with Kahkar in the corridor outside the room.

"We have received a distress call from Voyager."

"I know. Come, I will tell you what I know. We must hurry."