“Lance’s second year” by
[email protected] (April 2004)
Updated
Harv has long identified with youthful spirit –
perhaps the base element of his human nature, if not the base element of all
humans (subject to environmental impact). Self-learning may also be the essence
of human nature.
Harv’s human environmental impact comes
in the names of other human associations – examples: Lance’s first year,
Lance’s second year, Danielle, Megan, Madeline, Edwin’s grandchild,
Ingrid’s kids, Junior Achievement, confirmation classes, Nancy’s
custodial grandchild, Sue’s grandchild, Nathan, and Harv as his #smiling self circa 1940. Sixty-four
years later in 2004 Harv began his Retirement life phase, building upon the
fullness of all his previous re-creations. Writing and web publishing have
sharpened Harv’s appreciation of life’s fullness – a promise
held out to all humans.
Youthful spirits also reside in old people
– Harv, Earl, George, and Edwin as examples. “You can know them
where you find them.”
One hundred billion humans have gone before
– all in some measure, examples of youthful spirit. For one religious
slant, the Bible offers 936 references on the human spirit. In human microcosm,
the rest of this page narrates about Harv’s interaction with
Lance’s second year as a youthful spirit.
A large gap of six months in updating this
file involved no picture taking for four months and not narrating two sets of
downloaded pictures (from 6-26 and 7-29). An 11-24 download had pictures of
Harv’s DaHon #delivery
from early August spanning weeks of bicycle redesign, smoothing the bumps on
the roads of #local
everlasting travel – computing, cooking, laundry, dress up ambience
“on the run”, #local #traveling (commuting),
#voting, and
reentry into Lance’s world.
In returning to web updating Harv
rediscovered that he was out of space in the target site. Another site was
opened as DocLanceOtto.
Lance’s adventures are arranged in
reverse chronological order – the more recent of Lance’s second
year experiences with Harv (minus a few weeks included with his first year) are
first.
Each time Grandpa Harv co-operates with
Lance, new exciting things happen. Harv’s memories of his childhood have
been paralleling his Lance adventures. Again, many memories and integrative
interpretation have yet to be written.
As an aside, way back in July, Tina honored
Grand Dad by preserving the #scene that moved her
to quickly attain the camera out of the house.
In November, Tina honored Grand Dad by
marveling about the way in which the following pictures came to be. For Harv,
these pictures offered the most recent superlative in his life, surpassing the
family’s giraffe experience in
Harv thinks that Lance knows that the #bird bites – at
least that it was making a mess by throwing away bits of fruit flesh seemingly
at the same time that it drank the nectar.
Much later in the day the action began to
happen. Lance #directed
the talking parrots – of course, Grand Dad was also talking at them.
Notice the finger of insecurity working into Grand Dad’s ear over the
noise. Then Chris got into the act by wanting a more perfect picture. Dad
smiled and Lance’s #finger proceeded
further into Grand Dad’s ear.
Now for the superlative – the adult
giraffe encounter. Tina quickly went for the crackers and Chris manned the
camera. Lance #yelled,
“Give me my hand back!” Grand Dad was mesmerized by looking this
huge creature right in the eye – eyes that could see the crackers and
nothing else even to the point of literally using its head in almost bonking
several other kids out of the way. They were on the deck and Lance was at the
height that the giraffe preferred.
Grand Dad #“oohed” at the
determination of this giant who had directly chosen these late arrivals in the
crowd.
And yet another cracker disappears as Lance #pats Grand Dad on the
head, saying, “Don’t be afraid Grandpa – I’m
not!”
Now the crowd is thinning as Lance has become
the giraffe’s singular attention. Now Lance has become #comfortable with this
giant and Grand Dad thinks, “You sure know the convenience of the hand
that feeds you.” And Lance offered the most attractive convenience.
The ending of this day found Grand Dad with
an infusion of energy – here Chris and Dad set Lance up with scraping his
head against some low netting. Previously, Lance would perform his ducking maneuver
along with Grand Dad lowering their profile for doorways and low hanging signs.
Lance was not impressed by this setup – already knowing at his young age
that the #netting
was not a threat. “Lance manages his life well!”
All the pictures here are acknowledged to
Tina and Chris – they have elevated Harv’s youthful spirit. Grand
Dad admires their part in supporting Lance in his actualization of his youthful
spirit – from there comes superlatives in a wholly life time.
“Thank you - and love to all from Grand Dad.”
“At 20 months Lance doesn’t take
naps anymore?” Enter Grand Dad – who is lucky like Ben Franklin,
“The harder I work the luckier I get.” So Grand Dad did his
routine, and within ten minutes had Lance #sleeping in the
stroller. Seventy minutes later he was awake in
Although Lance reached the #fourth level in the
Play Land, returning by way of a tunnel slide, and apparently unshaken by the
experience, Grand Dad thinks it was a little too much of a stretch for his age
– he has never gone past the first level since. That first day he
seemingly wore out five steering wheels, and used his found Funnie Ball on the
air hockey table – he naturally #squeezed in between
the window and the table where the ledge raised his stature. Perhaps bored with
the games (we can only hope) he ventured freely out into the main restaurant
with Grand Dad’s eagle eye watching from a distance. And from close up
when his #light
‘jumped’ through the opening ‘on its own’. He
discovered the swinging motion of the chairs and gave a #smile of being all
grown up. He is age appropriate in being all he can be – ready to join
the Army of the same value so that he can offer his life in service (or maybe
not).
Of course we have to get him out of diapers
first – there he is taking that #rest on the walk back
home. It’s no time to hassle him at his time of duty. On the walk he #collected treasures - several
types of flowers with all plant types being called “tree”. The bolt
and washer were found in two different locations. He labored to get the two
together then temporarily gave up. Grand Dad snuck them together and put them
down. Later Lance again took up the struggle – this time trying to get
them apart. Finally he was successful. He eventually will repeat the ‘straw
back into the lid hole’ operation with the bolt and washer scenario
– just a matter of time and opportunity. He already has success with a
small car into the wet vacuum reservoir. On his walks he frequently sits to
rest. He and Grand Dad commune during those invaluable opportunities –
the time is his with GD just seemingly hanging around. But GD knows better.
Both are joyful, loving, and free – Lance laughs a lot with Happy Harv.
Both are actualizing the fulfillment of their existence, relatedness, and
growth needs.
Lance gets around. At the restaurant he
explores the ramp outside the fence and in between the bench – pushing
the boundaries of his world (freeing his self from whatever confines). Notice
the motor skills with the #placement of both hands
and the feet as they feel their way along the edge of the ramp designed with a
fence just to keep adults away from the edge – yet the mind of a sixteen
month old chooses to safely explore the edge outside of the provided fence.
When eating the #booth
arrangement serves well.
Grand Dad lured Lance unto this bridge before
the water show started, and once there, Lance sat in #wonderment to enjoy the
show, oblivious of Grand Dad rushing to and fro for the lure and the photo
shoot.
Walking to McDonald’s, this house has
been passed many times. On this occasion, Lance was on foot – he crossed
the street under close supervision, then cut across the grass, directly for the
front door. Grand Dad knew not why the interest until Lance picked up the #alligator on the front
porch. Grand Dad quickly responded and we continued on the way to
McDonald’s. Grand Dad could hardly see the porch no less the alligator
that greeted visitors. And Lance surely visited!
Lance continues to visit at McDonald’s.
For reason unknown to Grand Dad, Lance went from our lunch table, walked around
the islands, #offered
this lady something (probably with coded verbiage) then returned for more
lunch.
#Moving day has arrived
– Lance is on the move again. “But not so fast.” Back in the
house, with the loaded truck on its way, and Mom at the new house, Grand Dad
shared some time with Lance. He was #playing with his toys, and
then things got particularly quiet. Grand Dad investigated. Lance had put
himself down for a #nap.
“Will wonders never cease?” However, the position #lacked for comfort thus
the nap was over within 15 minutes.
On the move again in the new neighborhood
– #shopping takes
on new meaning. There’s more space. The #power carts are stored
indoors. And the cart rows have #aisles made just for small
people. But #disappearing
into the row of carts triggered a call of intervention from Grand Dad.
Lance shakes Scarlet’s paw as a sign of
knowing another gentle creature – first the #front paw then the #back paw. Then comes the
comfort of being #laid
back and up close with another creature. Scarlet #objects but not enough for
her to move her now dysfunction hind quarters. Lance tries a #swimming move. Then
another hug to bid Scarlet #ado.
Here’s #Nathan leading the way out
of another secret park – entered into by Lance’s lead and followed
by Dad’s participation.
Grand Dad waits in #splendor. Later at the restaurant,
rain forest lightening and #thunder
surprise Lance with Dad hamming it up.
Here’s Dad getting the come on from a
local #resident. Mom
and Dad get away to #kayak
to the back lot of the zoo. And later came the traditional #train ride. #Lizards now catch his eye
as he travels, warranting an emphatic point and a one-syllable exclamation.
Here Grand Dad sets up the highchair and offers
apple pies. The highchair was immediately bypassed and you see Lance’s
own effort in #sitting
at the table. The apple pie innards were of some interest, but not enough to
reorder. Other passing items were apple dippers – too sour, buns –
Grand Dad switched to salad. Highchairs are also too confining at #restaurants.
Eyes are riveted on #others
and Grand Dad doesn’t interrupt. Hunger however #refocuses his attention.
With hunger abated, it’s fun and learning #games with new tools in
his life – like his own cup and ice. By now the straw can be right hand
inserted into the cover – learned without outside intervention. He also
tries his hand #cutting
his cheese – success once but it’s easier to just bite it off.
After McDonald’s, the venue turns to
the mall, but first a walk in his #park. Then a stray cart
returns to the grocery. Grand Dad pushes the cart backwards to the
“Hmmm” #pleasure
of a sightful rider. At another mall, he quickly learns to operate the #stepping machine on his
own.
A neighbor’s #food was of interest,
especially when approved by a companion. Adult disapproval did not discourage
him.
At this growth stage #naps remained normal and
exploration preeminent, even as close as #pushing through the
neighbor’s shrubs holding a threatening branch with one hand. It’s
no wonder that the shoes show a wear #hole.
Lance’s gentleness shows. He traveled
up the path to greet a potential #companion of interest.
Grand Dad held back but the mother was right there, perhaps not trusting that
an adult moment would be forthcoming. Lance hurried up the path to give the
girl his toy – perhaps his first courtship. She kept it for some time
until retrieved by Grand Dad. Their #communication went on for
some time.
“Dog” also provides communication
via #leash. Lance
pushes his opportunity to commune with Soco. And Soco returns the favor by
showing Lance the “switch sides from behind move”. Grand Dad
frequently reins in Soco via voice yet Lance never lets go nor falls –
his iron grip and legs serve him well. In this instance, he was #spun around and continued.
Although Lance has been receiving the finest
#driving
‘instruction’ aptly named DIY (do it yourself), he has this
difficulty in staying on the road. Lance repeatedly has close calls with #trees, frequently drives
unto the grass, and even prefers to motor into the #ditch – the picture
documents the third venture down into the ditch. He has gotten so skilled as to
come close to motoring into the water. Harv’s intervention was greeted
with a very short but loud tirade.
To get anywhere, one must learn about literal
and figurative keys. With keys in hand, Lance looks for a lock, with closed #doors a prime candidate.
He can see the real lock but it is out of reach, thus the #bolt head of the
door’s crossbar serves as the magic lock. Note the precise placement of
the key point to the ‘keyhole’. This skill also is practiced when
instantly placing the point of a soda straw to the hole in the cup’s
cover. Time and again the straw is extracted and reinserted whenever. In either
case, the focus of uninterrupted #concentration must be a
leap within the mind.
The keys are also requested and #carried for whatever
reason (including risk increase in pushing their abilities). Although able to
negotiate stairs safely, Lance frequently tumbles down several stairs –
perhaps the ‘grown-up’ version of unexpectedly sitting from a
walking or running activity. Perhaps these ‘routine’ operations are
being pushed into the status of subconscious control.
Upon discovering the driver’s education
car, Lance’s keys were quickly relegated to the floor, and seat #belts were a subject of
last importance. The drive began with good intentions for the turn into traffic
– “Anybody #coming?”
But this rush hour traffic was something else – “There, now
it’s #gone.”
“Where’s the #brake
pedal, or is this the accelerator pedal?” “Watch out, #you @$%^&*!”
“Brace #yourself!”
“Ouch, that really #didn’t
happen.” “Who disconnected the #air bag?”
“Going through the #windshield
isn’t that bad.” “Oh, this driving sure takes a lot #out a person.”
“Better get out of here #quick.” After that,
Lance was asleep in the stroller, literally within minutes.
Lance appreciates the high chair. To show his
appreciation, he strolls by pushing it. Thusly, the following picture has the
primary purpose of showing the high chair pushed to the door, and #abandoned there while
Lance takes in yet another perspective of his expanding world. Before leaving
McDonald’s, he checks the #stability of the tables.
On another day, the pushed stroller was
literally steered (although erratically) into the space between the trash
island and the table. Then, into the created challenge, Lance squeezed in for
more #beneath the table
exploration. Embarrassed in being caught in his private place, he quickly #fled.
At Ruby Tuesday’s, Lance takes up #cleaning, yet short of the
state of cleaning up after himself. The neat part of this situation being the
mother’s #guidance
in this ‘cleaning’ operation.
Providing an atmosphere of serenity for
Lance’s naps becomes more challenging as his age and his world increase.
At times Harv has not the energy to keep the stroller moving through a
hopefully one-hour nap. Harv then sets up his ‘office’ and attempts
wording – #awaiting
the dawning of another growth stint from Lance. (How easily adults let slide
their environmental preparation - for not only the child’s grow but also
their own.) In Lance’s case and in Harv’s case way back when, the
child finds growth from where they are – they take on their
parent’s tradition for a relatively better or worse judgmental score.
Lance measures in height, weight, nap time length, sleeping through the night,
constipation, solid foods, and the most excellent – speaking in sign
language to communicate his needs. From scientific psychology the basic needs
being hierarchical as existence needs, relatedness needs, and growth needs.
Thus when Lance awakes with the rest need filled, he sees a smiling face, and
his preoccupation then turn to growth – materials within reach, animals,
other people, and a sense of the dangers of ‘too much’ growth
– especially when his ‘mind’ gets ahead of the adult’s
less we forget that his free will is already being formed in one of two ways
– adversarial or cooperative (negotiation).
Lance has discovered the institutional doors
with the vertical bars running to the top and bottom latches. Harv thinks that
he has a feel for the #stairs
behind doors as these. These stairwells offer the echo sound and additional
kid’s #ramps.
Then in a thought of relatedness, Lance asks for a literal #helping hand in stepping
down the stairs. Note the facial consternation.
Another Lance #facial, along with bent
knees, indicate that Lance was again reprimanded not to stand on chairs and
especially swings.
Not associated with this walk, Lance was
exploring the garage in a manner that would not be permitted by good parenting.
Since Harv ne’r fits most stereotypes, he and Lance were exploring the garage.
First the vacuum led the duo from house to
garage. Mother never has the vacuum in the garage and Lance thought, “Now
is the moment for ‘sweet’ surrender,” with Mom slightly
objecting and Harv smiling at Lance’s frustration in getting the vacuum
over the threshold and down the step into the garage. Second came the gardening
tools with Harv shortening the scrubber squeegee handle. Third came the high
bouncing golf balls and their entrance into the front loading washer. Fourth
came Lance’s reach – not high enough – to get the dog’s
leash. He settled for a grasp of the collar that he knows attaches to the
leash. Down the collar came as he pulled against the leash coiling machine.
Vocally complaining against the coiler’s resistance, Lance pulled the
cord out and down to the middle of the garage floor, only to complain the
loudest when releasing the leash back up to its high position.
Harv relented and took the coiler from its
high hook. Lance proudly returned to the house to display his prize to Mom.
Harv was busy all this time quickly returning the garage items into place for
Dad’s homecoming from the job. The point of these preface remarks being
that the coiler is Lance’s prize, especially with collar filled with a
separate mind of mobility.
Such was the case for the now trio’s
trip to Deer Creek village – the Williamsburg suburban area comprised of
at least a half dozen of these village clubhouse complexes – each with a
slightly different set of facilities. Now on with Lance’s prize
relationship.
First Lance #instructs the dog.
“Ya, sure.” A #difference
of opinion quickly presents itself. Lance going for the physicals and the dog
going for the smells. The wanderings of the dog #pulls on the attention
span of the ‘master’. And what of the greatest of adult fears
– that Lance will experience a horrorific rope burn. Note that Lance uses
his iron man’s grip to hold the rope. “Who knows?” Lance may
have already experienced the burning ability of the rope. However, Harv’s
eye has not noticed a problem in Lance’s management of the rope machine.
A #compromise?
“Hardly.” Is that a steak bone in the dog’s mouth?
“Also hardly. It could be so lucky - not.” Upon close inspection
the dog’s tongue is part of the ‘t-bone’ and the raised leg,
the other parts.
Now the dog’s area looks more
interesting and little feet are on the #move. Note well that
throughout this lengthy episode, Lance’s iron grip has not released the
coiler. The dog cooperates, although it has the ability to jerk the coiler from
Lance’s grip. Note in the picture that the shovel is neatly yet
precariously stored on top of the ash can.
The dog however, will cooperate in the hot
sun only so long, now resting in the #shade. Both the dog and
Harv are watching Lance explore the shovel that is attached to the ash can
while Lance is attached to the dog via the coiler. The complexity of
Lance’s world accelerates. With the dog rest period instantly ending,
Lance #stumbles within
his new self imposed ‘responsibility’ of dog tending and the
necessity of exploring.
Lance has his priorities, he releases the
coiler, and the dog and Harv come to his aid – neither doing anything
except adding #intensity
to the situation. They both act – the dog smells and Harv untangles
Lance.
Harv again waters the dog, Lance has a snack,
bypasses the play equipment, and takes a side trip to #inspect a small tree. The
inspection process usually consists in ripping off a leaf, then placing it back
from whence it came, then wondering why the plant didn’t take the leaf
back.
The caravan slowly moves homeward, now Harv
has the leash – playtime is over. Lance stops to #investigate a sprinkler
head. Another stop to #investigate
a water meter cover. Harv permits as much exploration as time will allow
– with allowable time increasing as Mom becomes more comfortable. A
recent record – in a time of need for rest, Mom got in a two-hour nap.
“Harv is proud of Tina’s accomplishments.”
A
Lunch ensued and interests turned to the
A short cut back through McDonald’s
watched the rain cease and the blue sky reappear. Before the rain, the
gardeners widened our #pathway
through the shrubs. “Lance #appreciates the roominess
over the previous tight squeeze.”
One hundred and ten cars in an hour was a
recent record for this drive through service.
Another visit to Warren Park brings a
turnabout of another kind broadness.
Harv again began this stroll into the park by
parking next to the play area plateau and opening the stroller gate. As usual,
Lance took his time in deciding to dismount. Then he leisurely walked back up
the walk to investigate the shower area. Harv followed with the empty stroller.
Then Lance pushed the stroller up the gentle incline until he found himself out
past the park gate and turning to proceed ‘home’.
Several yards toward home something clicked
because he abandoned pushing the stroller, turned 180 degrees and returned to
the park gate that Harv again opened for an adventure of roaming the #wilderness instead of the
sidewalk.
Each platform of picnic tables was #explored – this one
being for eating on the go with the strolled seat being used as the tabletop
for eats.
Then Lance asked to return to the stroller,
Harv complied, and the ride home was soon graced by a nap.
At home, the roaming continued, specifically
in association with an electrical #cord of considerable
length. How long? Long enough to #measure the entire patio.
Each of these adventures, mind you, last many minutes, building quickly into
hours.
With patio measured, the surrounding shrubs
come under inspection. An abandoned cup is discovered, instantly #crushed since the weather
has sapped its strength. After crushing it Lance probably reviews that it is no
longer capable of holding drink, although he #mimics a drinking action
with the now demolished cup. “All in the mind of a child. Do you know
what your ‘child’ thinks?”
Harv knows of no broken bones in the
immediate extended family that would this family setting to loose the tether of
fear. Loosing the tether ne’r brings a tear to Harv’s psyche in
reaction to this growing (away) individual named Lance. But this day Harv did a
lot of cringing and quick ‘protective’ movements. Lance had
adventured unto a distance where instant protection didn’t quite reach.
Nor could Lance quite reach – he had literally been here before,
literally walked down these same stairs, and walked away to other adventure on
solid terra firma. But not today – perhaps he decided that his two fisted
iron #grips were up to
the test. “Harv witnessed that as the case.” Just to get your sense
of worry heightened, a boy twice Lance’s age, this day came down these
same steps, deciding to take the giant step ‘short cut’ with the
wide inviting girth, fell and spent 20 minutes in his mother’s arms
crying. Are you ready?
First, a directional change to the safe
platform where he fainted the sliding #position. Surprisingly, he
accepted Harv’s fingers for stability and all the way down he flashed,
and as Tina confirmed, Lance now maintains a fairly balanced sitting position.
“The ride was fast and the only one of the day. Lance pushes his luck
– not.” Now enter the turn around in the form of a half dozen kids.
An older girl #passes Lance to quickly go
through the tunnel, something that he had not actualized on his own.
“Yet.” Lance has tunnels at home and plenty of tunneling
experience, thus he proceeded to #chase through to new
heights – literal as well as figurative.
Here is where Harv has his double dilemma.
One: does he let Lance continue his adventure? Two: which side does he cover
– the far side with a no-step drop off, or this side with the steep
stairs. After ‘covering’ both sides (it’s a long way around),
Harv decided that avoiding the far side was within Lance’s safe reasoning
experience plus the side bars were close, making a slip or mistake unlikely,
and in case he would lunge through for the ‘save’. All of this
thought as Lance sizes up the further #heights, not in the least
interested in the distance down on neither side. “Up he goes.”
Now at the #zenith, the most difficult
way is down, and it’s far from nightfall. Well down he came, then up
again, then this far down the steep #stairs (note the dual iron
grips), probably realizing he could make it down, so he reversed and went #back up. “Then it
happened! He fell – sort of. Harv was within arms reach in a split
second. But no save was required.”
Lance came down this giant step, missing the
small step in the vertical middle but placed to one side horizontally, actually
swung down to come face-to-face with the #bars. That picture is a
milder Lance-chosen re-creation of the daring feat where Harv’s body and
heart leapt. In another trial Lance lost his balance from the small step,
turned outward and thus down by gravity to the floor where another youth can be
seen in a downed position. Lance’s instincts broke his hard fall with
both hands. “That hurt.” With his face grimaced in pain, he got up
without hesitation, Harv backed off from arm’s length, and Lance again
climbed to the zenith – seemed like five times but Harv wasn’t
counting. Lance attacked this adventure ‘on the edge’ with gusto.
Eventually, Lance tired of the adventure, was satisfied, and returned to the
new springed-figures that he never moved upon before.
The attraction was the older kids. Lance
moved toward the older girl ‘riding’ the duck. Harv could see what
was coming but was too interested in intensely watching the tactics so as to
miss taking the picture for posterity. Lance moved in on the duck duo, and
somehow got an opening to get his right arm in and almost around the
duck’s neck. He was going to pull himself up unto the duck. The girl had
other plans to maintain her position. She simply shoved Lance away. Of course
his legs were faced forward, then with the push away, he was turned, the right
foot backed against the left where his weight was placed. Thus he simply
‘tripped’ over his own leg and practiced a gentle yet quick
sit-down – a situation he had practiced many times.
Lance’s thought probably went something
like, “There must be some mistake. Let’s try this #again.” Notice
Lance’s seat stuck with the ground leavings as evidence of his immediate
previous sitting position. But this time the girl wouldn’t give Lance the
inside neck position. Without the inside position for leverage, Lance and Harv
went off to other adventure. The adventure of riding the ‘springs’
was of no interest before, was not worth pursuing presently, and was not
pursued for future months.
Interesting that the girl’s mother was
almost immediately upset that her girl was not ‘sharing’ with
Lance. Harv had to be persistent in having her let her girl choose to maintain
her position. The girl was firm, Lance ‘asked’ twice, took the
“No” body language communication in stride, was not upset, and
Lance went on to explore the play area building’s downspout as a musical
instrument. The kids negotiated their wants (versus the limited resources)
quite well – a lesson well learned. With the alternate harmonics well
having better potential in the long run scheme. Harv thinks, “An
excellent attention span lesson with a unique choice in directing his own
attention to a broader offering of a bigger world beyond a duck with a spring
for legs. He negotiated his world, leaving the limited resource behind, and
ended up smiling at the rediscovered harmonics of his musical
instrument.”
Perhaps Lance knew that Harv was there, but
never looked or ‘cried’ for assistance, until he wanted to share
the harmonics of his downspout. Lance then proudly shared his sounds with Harv,
producing broad smiles all round. This inconsequential incident set in a scene
where two other girls who were looking upon the #negotiation. Looking
closely, the older girl was born with no fingers on her left hand – she
too negotiates her world, albeit a ride shared with another – but that
was not to be for Lance this day. “Ask and it shall be given unto
you?” Rather what is given is, “A full life, but not each specific
want – declined wants are part of a full life’s scene.”
Over the weeks of attempted parental
functioning, Harv has learned to check with Tina and Chris if Lance needs to be
lulled to sleep with a long enough stroller ride. This was such a day.
Harv began by heading away from the crowds
and into the shade. Would you have it that two #ducks were coming directly
to us at full land speed? As you can see, Lance was at direct attention –
stimulated to say the least. Although his verbal excitement and emphatic
pointing did diminish under this uncharacteristic charge. Apparently the ducks
were fed regularly and they confused us with the providers. They circled within
several yards while we proceeded to seek the serenity of a nap.
Next impediment – the sun. We had to
east into the morning sun and the stroller shade wasn’t low enough. Harv
opted not to push the stroller backward for whatever reason. The legendary hat
was affixed. This didn’t help.
Avoiding the people, Harv sought the far
reaches of the parking lot. He had tilted the stroller backstop slightly and
gently encouraged Lance to lie back. Lance did cooperate until the fire engines
came screaming along the adjacent thoroughfare. There Lance was – upright
again.
After a few hundred more yards we were again
close to naptime. Now we were circling to the west, the sun was not a problem,
no people around, and the pavement generally smooth.
Going on five minutes into Lance’s nap,
Harv entered a secluded shaded area – the rear of an isolated outlying
chapel. Lance was sleeping, there was a live electrical outlet on a small
porch, Harv powered his computer, and the serenity was being enjoyed by the
duo. Until…
Harv’s senior citizen thinking
capacity, further dulled by NutraSweet, ‘forgot’ that the
chapel’s chimes mark the three-quarter hour. Lance stirred yet remained
asleep. “Phew,” Harv’s anxiety was relieved for another subconscious
fifteen minutes.
Toughing through another cold, Harv began
coughing. In reaction, Lance stirred enough, so that when the lengthiest top of
the hour ‘belling’ began, the nap didn’t have a chance.
Lance’s non-refreshed eyes slowly came open and the incessant
‘bell-owing’ pried them fully open. Harv watched helplessly with
“no instant genius” to be had.
The stimulation of the world had again won
over the adequate nap. “Try, try again.”
The farthest play area within walking
distance; Deer Creek is a 40-minute walk for Harv. While Harv rests, Lance does
his exercise. First to the one of three play structures – up the #stairs without hesitation.
At the #helm for a
minute. Then down the slide with Harv’s assistance. No coaxing needed but
the mechanics are still out of reach. As usual, Lance has little attention span
for the play structures.
Bypassing the other two structures, he is off
exploring greener pastures. Look at the #gait of Lance the explorer.
For whatever reason, Soco was making a snack out of this plant. Lance #investigated but it
didn’t pass his taste test. A nice play area, Harv managed water for
Soco, and the wide-open area was clear for kids roaming.
Lance and Soco met a lady who visited from
the pool. Soco was uncomfortable with her in the pool. Soco woofed even though
a ten-foot fence separated the two. Lance, on the other hand, wanted in; where
the action was. Even though he was accompanied, as the sign required, his
adventure #stopped at the
gate this day. On the way Lance investigated the kids proof pool filtering
equipment enclosure – the enclosure vibration enamored him. Lance also
managed #Soco and a
snack ensued. “No rope burns yet.”
Here cometh another two hours of Lance and
Harv. Typically the trip begins with a stroller ride. This ride took us to a
previously unexplored commons area consisting of a lake access and always other
interests. Lance wandered around some then decided to advance unto the play #equipment. First he went
to the step brushed the sand a bit, changed direction, heading for the purple
side enclosure. He straddles the barrier to gain entrance. On the way out he
stands with both feet on the barrier, holding onto the pole with iron man grip.
He had this mischievous grip and Harv thought, “Oh no, don’t commit
ethnic suicide.” Harv’s first residence was a typical
Back to Lance stranded on the suicide ledge.
He decided to back off, step down with both feet, then put a foot over to
straddle the barrier and bring the other foot along. Harv thought that he would
have decided to step down forward. “Wrong guess.”
As is usually the case, a ‘walk
away’ follows a taste of the play equipment. He begins wandering when the
#swings come into his
consciousness. He immediately points emphatically while accelerating his gait.
Harv reaches for the camera. Harv aims and shutters. At the same time Lance
sees a bottle cap in his path, instantly stops, stooping down for the pickup,
just in time for slow Harv to capture the now non running Lance. “Oh
well.” Lance thoroughly enjoyed the #swinging.
Back at the commons’ shelter sat five BMX
bicycles, their rides nowhere in sight. Lance investigated each #bicycle – pulling,
shoving, jerking, turning, climbing. Harv steadied each bike as Lance did his
hands-on and foot investigations. Lance attempting to put the foot to the pedal
was an amusing sight. When the investigation came to the chain that was the end
of that. Intervention carried the duo away and out came a wipe to clean of the
greasy hand (and lower arm). “Time to move on.”
The duo began to ‘motor’
‘across town’ to another play area and ‘borrow’ lake.
But first a #snack. He
ate everything in sight. Don’t misunderstand about the crumbs pile.
That’s what was left in the snack bag. Harv dumped what remained in the
bag and Lance picked out the big chunks – whatever it was he liked it.
Those aren’t french fries, they are veggie sticks. With this
‘meal’ came a major #‘chill’.
In musical terms, “Back in the saddle
again.” The sidewalk parallels the sixth hole with quite adequate
landscaping as separation. Lance’s highway is the #sidewalk. The assumed
electrical compartment shown here was traversed by Lance a half dozen times
– the sound was different, the texture was different. Then where was a
water box that Lance proceeded to squat upon for several minutes just watching
the traffic go by. In the picture, a piece of trash is of interest. Harv was
watching intently to determine if Lance intended to investigate the ant colony
at the corner of the electrical box. “No interest. Whew.” But he
did molest a single cone to watch the ants swarm. The duo vacated the area promptly.
Walking proceeded to a point where the
landscaping abutted the sidewalk. The plantings offered a niche that Lance
stepped into, he laughed, and Harv thought, “
“Yes,” this park afforded the
fire ant bites episode – but not a repeat this day. Checking earlier in
the week, park maintenance had apparently cleared the park. Additionally, more
play equipment had been installed.
Disembarking from the stroller was a lengthy
affair – Lance had not the motivation to move quickly. Eventually he
decided to let himself down, Harv thinking that the new play equipment would be
of first interest. Lance ‘talked’ about the equipment as he sat
unleashed in the stroller for those many initial minutes.
Instead, Lance walked up the path, exploring
the shower area, picking up a shell left behind by another explorer. He now had
two acorns without crowns, a shell half, and part of a tangerine rind. He ate a
section then wanted the rind for whatever reason – to carry for the next
two hours – “Why else?”
Now Lance headed across the park to the
toddler equipment, proceeding to ‘walk’ up the #stairs without any trouble.
Then immediately proceeded to the top of the slide, sat down, began the trip,
lost his balance, and with Harv half holding him, flashed down over the end of
the slide, feet landing to the ground, but his back flat against the slide
surface. The trip was quick. Once was enough, he went off in another direction.
Then the swing came into his focus. An immediate
full-arm pointing gesture let Harv know what he wanted next. At first, #not much excitement. Then
Harv got the idea that fast was Lance’s style. The #excitement rolled out.
Back to walking, the drinking #fountain came into
Lance’s consciousness. Of course, Harv has this sit-‘em-on-the-knee
method, leaving all hands free in anticipation of whatever. Lance drinks some,
and washes his treasures of the day. These treasures, mind you, were literally
in hand for hours.
Where there was no puddle before, now there
was a puddle from the drinking fountain overflow. Harv placed Lance from the
knee-sit position unto the drinking fountain pad, then straightened up to
stretch out. By that time Lance was in the puddle. “On well, wet #shoes. Too late now.”
The water was #enchanting,
but sitting in it gave Lance a soiled outfit bottom.
Harv’s intervention was to change the
venue to lakeside, thinking Lance’s interest n the water would continue.
“Not so,” as Lance #walks back up the path,
winding into the mulch then out again, pulling off pieces of grass or bud, the
trying to stick the severed piece back unto the plant. “No luck.”
After the exercise, it was naptime for the
stroller ride back. Awakening, after a short park in the yard, brought on a
snack, forcing the release of those clutched #treasures. There they are
– the shell, two acorns, and the peel. Their value, “Priceless.”
Lance #vantages a foggy Sunrise
Service after abandoning his parents’ laps and ‘pew’ - he
paid his respects but when it was time ‘to be about his Father’s
business’ he left the pew – with Harv as his mascot. “When
will he even learn to sit still?” Or, “Isn’t it awful that
‘irresponsible parenting’ lets this ‘wild animal’ run
loose?” To the contrary, Harv sees Lance’s exploration as
responsible grow facilitation. Note Lance’s iron grip on the seat arm
– he manages his life well within the safety of culturally stretched
parental delimitations.
At first, Lance just traversed the stairs
– up and down repeatedly. Harv thinks that the repetition stopped when he
was satisfied that he had mastered that skill set. As Lance’s venturing
progressed, he went into an aisle a few seats down, and then came back out.
Then he proceeded back down to the parents to say “Hi,” in the form
of getting a drink of water. No lack of communication with this 13-monther. He
signs and the parental unit active listens.
An interesting note – when proceeding
down this set of stairs he took his right soft-soled ‘shoe’ and
felt over the edge of the stair. With his practiced balancing, he was able to
release his left hand grip and shakily step down solidly on his right foot.
“Look Ma, no hands!”
Then back up the stairs, emulating a
perpetual motion machine. Into the aisles again and back out, each time a
little further, keeping his distance from the ‘strangers’. Then his
breakthrough – he went all the way down one empty aisle to the next
stairs – these with a railing.
Lance decided to take the stairs down, and
with left hand responsibly using the rail for his ‘iron man’ grip,
he calmly and relatively quickly proceeded down the shallow stairs the
‘adult’ way. Harv moved in closer for this riskier situation but no
need to worry in 20-20 hindsight. Thus, he survived sunrise service to visit
McDonald’s yet another time.
At McDonald’s Lance #laments, “Oh no, not
another picture.” “This McDonald’s place is getting to be a #bore, even with all the
remodeling. The balloon helps.” “Well, the #whistle still works.”
“HEY, this #chair
makes lots of noise. The noise comes from down #there.” “A #kiss for the sweet
chair.” Harv gets the idea and the duo leaves McDonald’s.
Lance pushes the stroller past the pillars of
the shopping center. At one pillar Lance progresses several steps past, then he
thinks, “That’s a shopping cart!” He immediately darts back
to retrieve the cart. This leaves Harv with a problem – a stroller, a
cart, and a toddler who can’t steer yet. Solution – the cart
carries the stroller, as Lance #directs, “Publix is
that way.” He knows that place because he is awarded a balloon when
mother shops.
The trash can reminds Harv that Lance will
pick up odd pieces of trash, walk over, and hand them to Harv. Harv then puts
the trash into the trashcan. A game? Harv thinks not. Rather, Lance has
probably seen Harv pick up trash now and then; therefore, Lance emulates
‘trash picking’ – although that term had a different meaning
in Harv’s elementary days. ‘Toys’ actually came out of the
‘ash boxes’. “Oh, the good [sic] old days.” Harv takes
those days into his (and Lance’s) future. Lance manages his life well.
Now if only the adults in his life can keep ahead of him, yet not get in his
way. “The challenge level of love!” In fact, all three levels of
love – respect, encouragement, and challenge. Some song comes to mind,
"Heaven, I'm in heaven…" Harv thinks, "Sorry, no pictures
of heaven." Yet, Harv thinks further, "This certainly isn't hell - it
must be retirement heaven."
For Harv, lifetimes are actualized one whole
hour after another. At times, the hour is frantic, at other times the hour is
boring. One traditional description of life’s problems can be seen as,
“The devil is in the details.” Yet, contraire for those who
understand that life can be continuous threads of joy, love, and freeing.
Each whole hour has work to be done. In this
picture Lance is #working
his mind whilst his body relaxes. This ‘backbreaking’ development
caught Harv at a time, not only least expected, but also hectic. Returning from
the food line, Harv even left his credit card on the table in reaction to this
new development. The primary cause was that all high chairs were in use. Note
that the temporary toys of straw and catsup cup were being devoured with little
attention as to food value. “Lance was hungry, patient, and certainly
relaxed.”
Serving lunch in the stroller was a challenge
overcome – the worst being that the outfit absorbed much orange juice
because no catch tray existed. In addition, an entire banana was devoured. No
McRonald cookies available today and Lance was #absorbed with all those
people in the busy restaurant. His posture was now more attentive, but still
relaxed if feet up counts for evidence. Harv and Tina devised a straw
shortening procedure, naturally with the sharper cutoff end inserted into the
cup. “The next time Harv checked, the straw was turned around with the
sharper end pointed up out of the cup.” Additionally, Lance can now
reinsert the straw into the cup lid with his left hand as well as his right.
Note that lunch is finished (no interest in the bun top the last several
visits) and Lance focuses on practicing detail #skills – something
you couldn’t force him to do. He is already well versed on making his own
decisions concerning life-long learning.
Now playtime becomes #boisterous. Harv has
already anticipated this phase by emptying the cup of all water.
“Woe! What’s happening?”
With a passion Lance now abandons playtime and #attacks the bun top, bites
a hole right in the middle of the bun, you can see his left index finger
holding the bun through the hole, and he is now delicately ripping pieces of
the bun – and eating them. Lance has now matriculated to parsing his own
food. Harv must admit that beyond Lance squeezing the orange unto his outfit he
has successfully experienced his first non high chair meal.
Now a half hour behind his due-home time,
Harv rushes home only to find Tina unconcerned – apparently, Lance and
Harv adventures with flexible time constraints have come into being. Harv and
Tina pre determined that a put-Lance-to-sleep walk would be the first adventure
sequence. The nap and subsequent no-nap ‘chill’ stroller ride were
the appropriate follow on to yesterday’s full day.
With outfit changed, and Harv content to rest
on the front porch chair, Lance criss-crossed the front yard doing all his
things, falling frequently, especially on the yard edgings – nothing Harv
hadn’t seen before. Then Lance added knocking on the front door with the
palm of his right hand. After about three door openings by Harv, Tina joined
the front yard socializing, and the front door remained open. The pleasant sub
tropical breezes were blowing and the setting idyllic.
Then Harv observed a new expansion to
Lance’s world. Perhaps Lance had observed the dog trailing behind the
bushes and disappearing in the past. In any case, Lance frequently chooses to
confront the challenge of stepping over the yard edging – time after time
– ad infinitum. Combined with the hidden nature of going behind the
bushes, Lance proceeded to attempt stepping over the #edging –
particularly high at the water softener. He fell at least once. Then a sit-down
while straddling the edging. “Ouch?” Not to Lance. With diaper
padding and frequent experience in this type of ‘falling’, he also
took this seemingly harder fall without distraction. Now Lance created his next
challenge.
He discovered he could reach the top of the
water softener and grip enough to assist his climbing unto the higher edging
but each leg in itself is yet strong enough to lift his body even with the
partially coordinated assistance of his arms pull. Harv watched Lance working
this challenge for many minutes. He would even abandon the scene, cross the
yard, and then do a seemingly random return to the hideaway. Harv admits to
clearing some items from the area to make it ‘playable’. Perhaps
making the area ‘explorable’ would be a better description of
Harv’s function.
After an enjoyable extended family hour in
the yard, Lance came up to Harv who was sitting in the porch chair –
directly facing Harv’s knees. Harv interpreted this as Lance wanting up,
so Harv made adjustments and Lance enjoyed some ‘chill’ time
sitting on Harv’s lap. You might interpret this scenario as Harv spending
hours working to get Lance to sit on Harv’s lap. Finally, Lance was ready
for some close time. Tina was also ready – impressed by the scene of Lance
and his Grandpa she took several treasured pictures. Best of all – Harv
treasures the experience. Joy, love, and freeing for self, another, and others
were actualized in these hours – consciously isolated from the humans who
facilitate the opposites of sad, hate, and fear. “Amen. So be it.”
Previously, Lance could negotiate walking
without stumbling. Now he noticeably stumbles. “Have no fear.”
After discussion, the adult rationalization is that Lance now tries to run
– thus stumbling more. “Is now the time to slow him down? Harv
thinks not.”
Lance now uses the #more sign for human
closeness (Harv’s speculation). “Perhaps he has developed the skill
of enjoying a ‘chilling’ #togetherness walk for all
those joy and love reasons. Yet he will instantly release the grip on your
finger for his freeing.” He still pushes the stroller with both hands,
then switches to pushing with his left hand to facilitate his looking ahead
– eventually abandoning the stroller and walking off without looking
back.
This week’s freeing included
‘tunneling’ beyond his living room tunnel. The #toddler tunnel is an actualization
breeze. Moreover, Harv has yet to witness Lance #bump his head anywhere
– that includes tunnels. In the McDonald tunnel, Lance closely #watches the five year old
disappear up and away. However, tunnels that go up and around still offer a #challenge rather than an
actualization – currently, that’s as far as he chooses to go.
Today’s exploration choice was a storm
sewer grate, although Lance was more interested in ‘life testing’
the sprinkler head pipe. Discouraged from the pipe, Lance’s second choice
was the #grate.
“Where did Grandpa’s #keys go?”
What he does frequently choose however is to
NOT take a nap. With #Chris,
Lance seems to be ready for that nap. Sure enough, Lance #naps. Harv calls this,
“The head falling off, or ninety degree, position.”
“Now everyone is hungry at #Disney.” Not everyone
gets a second chance to put his or her best face forward.
