The hall was packed with over eighty people. The master of ceremonies, the Toastmaster, introduced the speaker of the evening. "Tonight, our showcase speaker. His name: Doug McGootchin. The title: one, two, three, FOUR words. Four words, Doug MacGenshin." Applause. Doug took the stage.

"It was a cool, crisp night. My girlfriend--Joy--and I were walking across the bridge at Balboa Park. We could hear the sounds of traffic underneath. I could feel her hand in mine. As we walked, the sounds of our shoes resounding off the pavement glistened [sic] in our ears. We had just seen Othello, and as we got to the car, my thoughts and feelings were racing through me; I was wondering how I was going to express what I felt for her. I expressed it in four words: Joy, I love you."

As this point, Joy's eyes were wide and riveted on Doug. The corners of her mouth were widening into a smile. Happy and excited to hear where this unexpected speech was going, Joy wondered what Doug was thinking and feeling, if he was nervous. Visibly unperterbed, Doug continued after a long, dramatic pause.

"Over the months that followed, I began to think 'What was it that forms this strange word of love?' And I thought, 'How can I more fully express that feeling?'" [In a stentorian voice:] Thinking, if I was Shakespeare, I would write a sonnet. [In an Italian stallion voice:] If I was, uh, you know, a suave kind of a guy, I'd probably get her some Champaigne and uh, roses and stuff, you know?" Chuckles from the audience. "But I am neither of those. I'm a Toastmaster." Big laugh. "So I decided to write a speech. There's three ways, out of the many, that I decided to cull into this speech tonight.

"The first way that I love Joy is I see her ability to take action. Now I know she's been a manager of the Red Cross, I know she works out all the time, but I really saw her willingness to take action one afternoon when we both volunteered at a site that helps clean up the beach. Volunteers would come, we'd distribute materials to them, then they'd go and they'd clean up the beach and come back. Well, I took the easy route. I was helping out at the table, giving them pencils and different materials, giving them their free gifts. Meanwhile, Joy was bagging the garbage, doing the dirty work. She's willing to take on those tough jobs, and take action as a leader.

"The second thing that I love about Joy is the compassion in her heart. One evening I was over at her house, and outside the window we heard a small voice: 'Meow, meow, meow.' She went outside and picked up this tiny, little kitten, brought her in, gave her some food. We have that kitten, now grown to quite a young cat, today. She's beautiful, she's wonderful, she's one of the delights of our lives: Ciena. She [Joy] has a compassionate heart.

"The third point is Joy's commitment to communication. One of the ways that we communicate is through, not only face-to-face, but through a diary. We keep a journal together. What we do is we write, one of us will write in it, and then we'll pass it off to the other person. So any reflections, any sorts of ideas that we have [are exchanged]. And the real strength of this is it allows us to express thoughts that don't normally come to mind, you know, on an everyday basis. So this is one way that we have of communicating. Another example of Joy's commitment to communication is the fact that she joined a compassionate communication group that I've been doing for about three weeks--er, three years, excuse me. We meet about every other week, and we explore this model of communication. The fact that she was willing to do that, and we use this model frequently, that showed me her commitment to communication. The last way that she's shown me that she really cares about communicating is the fact that she's starting to take German. I'm in a Ph.D. program to learn German history and I'm planning to go to Germany to study in the archives there. My advisor said, 'Any woman who's willing to learn a foreign language for you must really be crazy about you.'" The crowd laughed.

"So those are three of the ways that I love Joy. Through her action, her willingness to take leadership, steps in leadership, her compassionate heart, and her commitment to communication. Yet, with all these incredible abilities and marvelous features in this woman, it shocked me when I found out that a boyfriend that she had before me was willing to kiss her in private, but not willing to hold her hand in public. Joy, I'm wondering if you'd be willing to hold my hand in public." Doug extended his hand toward Joy who was sitting, her eyes fixed on him. A murmur and then clapping emerged from the audience. Joy immediately stood up and went to Doug. He was surprised that she did so quickly; he thought she might need more coaxing. She later told him that she had forgotten that there was anyone else in the room. Doug continued his presentation.

"I'd like to conclude this speech as I began it, with four words, to express my love to Joy. These words are: Joy, 'would you marry me?'" Squeals of delight, laughter, and prolonged clapping erupted from the audience. Joy flung her arms around Doug and said, "Yes!"