did you know that in 1984 buffalo drafted a runningback whose first name was speedy? lmfao!!! imho... : P... that made my century!!! check it! ha!
for pete's sake... its 4/21
well... i was feeling better up until about 3 hours ago... when i found out that my criminal justice exam was today and not (sigh) next week like i thought... my fault really... but man... when i got to class i thought to myself... 'my my they are quite a few people here for lecture today...' than i noticed that almost nobody had their notebooks out ready to take notes... and of course... the icing on the cake... the ink in the pen... the deep end of the pool... the real capper was... the scantron sheets sitting on his desk... and still i thought... the test can't be today... he began handing out the answer sheets... making me want to vomit everywhere (or in the graceful and elegant words of mr. nelly... errwhere... aka errtime... must be that country grammar he's always clammering about... boo...) but seriously... i felt like i wanted to throw up because i did zero studying for it... i just hope that i can somehow muster up a high 'c'... (please... no juice box jokes...) if i don't get at least a 'c' on this bad boy... i don't know what i'm gonna do... i'm gonna go lick some leaves... or collect some stamps... or something... my rents will probably kill me before i ever get the chance to accomplish any of those monumental tasks though... so this may be my last entry... ever... anyway... got another exam in my computer science class... fucking hope that one's actually next week like i think it is... otherwise it could be in t-minus ... 1 hour... yay... did i mention i'm currently at work... (of course...) man... i don't know why... but i can't get my mind off of chuckie cheese... blah... i've remained very uncreative lately... not in a bad mood anymore... just my brain is functioning about as much as a 500lb heffer's metabolism... lol... joel and me were watching maury the other day... that show is gold... anyway... i'm tired... got 0 z's last night... just couldn't... don't know why... probably that damn hole in the ozone... : P... anyway... i'm done i think... double check... yep...
the day after 4/18
at work again... saw allie on the way here... man... she's a hoot and a holler! she's on the run for some reason... llsshh... couldn't coax it out of her why (despite my best efforts... or close enough...) she is crazy... in the native american kind of way... not the "i'm bob dole... now watch me as i put on this suit made of fire and play the ukulele" kind of way... whatever... sucks because i've been reaaaaaalllllyyyy anti-social today... don't know why... my brain just isn't functioning... at all... anyway... don't know if i said it or not but jeff got his new job at miller park... mike's putting tube doors on the jeep... gonna be honest mike... i'm gonna kinda feel like cattle... : P... plural... anyway... my battery is low... and i don't really feel like writing or doing anything except being a lil biatch today... sooo yeah... blah... i'm out and hopefully i'll feel a little bit better when i write next time... booyah...
i once met this guy... his name was 4/17... he was born in september
well well well... if you can guess where i am right now (preferably when i'm writing this and not when you're reading this as that could cause some major complications... in surgery...) anyway... last night was regal!!!... or mayhaps princely... lol... thesaurus.com... my home away from home... last night was just plain... to quote the late mr. nat king cole... unforgetable... that's what you are... which stands to reason... because it may be unforgetable for a couple weeks... but than just gets lost in the shuffle... but seriously folks... (the non-gang reference kind) last night jeff and me (i for those who enjoy a nice "proper grammar" when they wake up in the morn)... jeff and me went over to his friend robYn/nicole's house last night... (the slash in this time frame represents an "and"... not an idiopathic synesthesia freak...) had an downright rootin' tootin' time... man... so much great stuff happened last night... i wish i could remember it all... (and alcohol in no way has anything to do with my memory lapse... i'm positive... lol which reminds me how the night got started... kind of awkward... we weren't completely sure we were at robyn's and the word positive got thrown out there carelessly... so the next line went a little something like... "i'm hiv positive... that's how positive i am..." anyway... that sucks i realize... but i'm gonna level with you... the rest of the night was flawless... i don't know how we managed... but jeff and i had everyone there debating the directional rotation of tornados/hurricanes based on the relitivity of their hemispherical location... lol... i remember that some poor soul (or sap... just because i live for that word) brought up tornados... i made general comment about those "make your own tornados" at one of those discovery centers or something (except during my convocation i believe i may have said 'discovery channel'... llsshh...) and just because i couldn't let the potential gold mine of a topic die... i threw in a little tidbit about how i always made my tornados gyre counter-clockwise... i'm gonna be honest with you... that was a bold-faced lie... than we got to thinking... if water goes down the drain the opposite direction in the southern hemisphere (no relation to the engine... hemi... blah...) do tornados rotate the opposite direction as well?... lol... like i said... i couldn't let such a potential life-altering coversation simply suffocate under the heavy stress of society's norms... or plaster... anyway... just to make an ass out of myself i claimed that i didn't think there even were tornados in the southern half of "the blue planet"... lol the best part is robyn sided with me... lol anyway... after discussing the ramifications this could hold on the camping situation for years to come... we shifted gears slightly to the topic of hurricanes... the same "logic" was applied... but than... a revalation... say they do spin in opposite directions... than... are you ready?... what if one begins in the south... but through its course moves into the northern hemisphere... what than?... coffee break... excuse me?... does it just stop... ask for directions... and dictate to the masses... i'll be honest with you... i have no idea what's going on right now... anyway... the night before last was equally as grandiose... i think that's a word... problem is... i don't think a lot... and when i do... it usually doesn't hold a candle to the genius that comes from everyone else... but the other night we (jeff, nate, mark, mark and myself) went to the brewers game... great times... simply maaaarvalous... after the game josh came over... man i love that kid... superb times and talks follow that kid everywhere... he ended up passing out on my bed at like 2-2:30ish lol... it was highlarious right before he passed out... we were all in my room talking and he wanted me to make him a soul cd... he was laying down and all of a sudden he shoots up (heroin... j/k) and starts blah-blah-blahing... not literally... that woulda been funny too though... he is like telling this story that jeff and me have no idea... we were just like... josh... buddy... we have no clue what you're talking about... than he layed back down... like 30 sec later... BAM!! he's up and talking about some other thing that i'm sure made sense to him... jeff and me just looked at each other... raised an eyebrow and started cracking up... than he layed back down... and no joke... within the time it took me to say "what other songs you want on your cd"... he was out... lol... 0-sleep in t minus .3 seconds... but i love that kid... oh... side note... people aren't as supportive as i would have expected them to be... right when we left robyn's house last night i spied with my little eye something that began with the letter 'b'... =barricade... those things... let me tell you... those things we obviously not meant to be carried for 7 blocks by a ...unsober... college 'student'... anyway... we have a flashing barricade hanging loose in our living room right now... i guess its under construction or something... i don't know... i'm not a doctor... anyway... work is almost done... and i need some sleep... i got like 2 hours or something... yikes... i'm through...
this is me in grade 9 baby!... but only on 4/15
i can't believe i've actually kept this site up and running (running like the indestructible machine that it is) for most 4 stellar decades... i... can't keep track of time... something i was born with... in 1843... anyway... just at work... again?... the best thing about my job (besides the savvy coworkers) is updating my website... than the drugs... j/k... i don't use drugs... on tuesdays... anyway... last night was indescrible... indescribable?... indescrible sounds more like something i did when i was 4.8... neutrons... old?... anyway... back to last night... abso-toot-a-loot-ly wondertifical times... we bought some red wine... please... no bob marley references... yet... because i shot the sheriff... i'm sorry... that was lame... but i did not shoot the deputy... GOT 'EM!!!... i've come to realize that my "updates/biographies" wouldn't be half as long if i didn't keep using the three periods everytime i want to signify a pause... or leave the room... or throw... meatballs... into... baby strollers... dammit... i've very thirsty right now... and i kinda wish i had my own dwarve strapped on to my back like a jetpack... so he could nurish me... and comfort me in my time of need... and tenderly nuzzle me... whoa... was that typed out loud?... kinda got off track... like a freightliner that don't take shit from no one... except easily stopped and put in check... anyway... last night=fan-frickin-tastic!... we were drinking our wine... pretending to be all sophisticated and shit... was jusst hilarious... we had candles everywhere as our only light source (...yes... we did it for the money too : P j/k) and a lava lamp... if you wanted to walk somewhere you either had to bring a candle with you or set your hair on fire... needless to say we had 911 on speeddial... because three digits is 4 too many when your hair folicles es enfuego... but we also had some thelonius monk jammin too... man... was tooo stupid fly... lol... sorry... anyway... josh came over with his significan other(?) jackie... and her suitemate/sweetmate... sigh... steph... josh... jackie's an awesome girl... wththff is up with her piercing though?!!! for serious!!! does she even know that she has one in the middle of her ear?... never seen that before... i'll be honest... kinda scared me... and i did throw up a little... but that was probably from all the fertilizer i ate before... wanted to grow up to be big and strong... : \ but yeah... josh is still, repeat, STILL my all time hero (and all time quarterback... lol) jeff and yo soy stayed up till the wee hours of the morn deciphering codes... for nintendo... j/k... just talking... about whowhat... the world may never know... i can't really remember a lot (two words!) to be honest... but when can i remember anything?... i wish i smoked the reefer or something that way i'd at least have a logical excuse for the way i act... because claiming that roberto the lumberjack-friendly white oak is my father really doesn't qualify in any of the 48 contiguous states... llsshh... fiddlesticks... this has become quite the run-on... anyway... tonight it sounds like jeff wants to go over to katie's because she's having a party?... i always feel completely out of place over there for like the first hour... than everyone starts shoving their asses in everyone else's faces respecfully... and i mean that in the 'showing respect' kind of way... not the 'in that order' kind of way... what?... i'm completely lost... anyway... megan said i could give her a call tonight... llsshh... i want to but i'm just a nervous wreck around her... and she is a very smooth individual... but not rich : P i really dig her... cuz she's a bad-mamma-jamma... but its just not meant to be like that... be she's totally a kickass friend... and that's what really makes the grade... ok... i'm sorry... i got way off course here... nate just stopped by my work and we were talking for about 45 min before i got yelled at... : ( next year is gonna be ridiculous! nate, jeff, joel and me all living together?... wow... i hope this summer kicks ass too... i mean besides the jury duty that i have to serve right after finals... i mean needless to say that'll be the highlight of my summer... but besides that... i hope the road trip doesn't fall through and we get to go to either neuvo york, s. carolina, or florida or someplace... i really want to video tape it too... damn suggestive coca-cola commercials... (must kill lincoln... lol... family guy quote right there... sigh...) anyway... you probably will never read this/read this much... if you do you're probably either psychosematicoutainsane... or me... which would probably constitute me being number one of that list as well... if anyone wants me to start doing those "top five lists" again just let me know... i can't think of very good topics though... all mine revolve around pudding... i'm done... lates
another update?... geez... it must be 4/11!
well its gettin to be that time o' the year again boy and gal... puppy dogs humping on other puppy dogs and peeing freely in pools... skirts wearing skirts : P... allergies/sinuses ruining a perfectly good episode of third watch... and, of course, who can forget four square?!... but in all seriouslyness... baseball's starting... meh... not too excited anymore... gonna have to find a new hat now that people are even making their dead grandfathers wear ye olde "b"... : \... hopefully jeff will get that job at miller park though cuz i know how much he absolutely loathes metro market... have to admit it sounds like a pretty sweet job... i'm getting soooo t.o.ed (aka ticked off... : O) with mine recently... (is it weird that when my manager's not in the room i'll want to get stuff done... but when she comes in i just want to drop everything and just starting jumping rope or something?...) anyway everybody's gonna be leaving the box office and it sucks... i don't want to be/can't be the only recurring character in this production!... yikes... yesterday was a splendarific day though... the weather was freakin' gorgeous!!!... but i was ruther disappointed that i couldn't fully enjoy it... although my mood was very chipper yesterday... my physical state contradicted it nicely... i'm sick/have sinus issues that make me feel like somebody's constantly pouring milk/vegetable oil down the back of my throat... (ummm yeah... that would be the mucus... : \) and i have to blow my nose like every 5 minutes otherwise she takes off running like she's o.j. and my face is the po-lice... (HUH?!) feels like i use the serated edge of a knife rather than kleenex when i blow it too... blow it sky high... (went through nearly an entire box of kleenex in less than a day!!! and i actually used it in the manner that's directed! : P) that and i feel like the olympic diving team is practicing in my tummy... aka i feel like i must vomit... but i got my homework done yesterday... joel's car is finally up on ebay... (wththff is up with a $220 bid on black tuesday?! that's what i've decided to call the regal since it ruined hundreds of people's lives back in the late 1920s...) anyway... i'm at work right now... fun fun... gotta start studying for my accounting exam numero two... that's on wednesday... yipes... april 20th hoping to go to some house finding expo or something... this is just kinda a reminder for myself... because i'm gonna read what i posed everyday for the rest of my life... cuz i'm a loser like that... no real news to report i guess... i got my Minus the Bear CDs that i ordered... i like 'em... its pretty catchy (plus their song titles are crazy ridiculous!! hilarious! one of their song's is titled "pantsuit... uggghh"... lol...) i find their lyrics very inspirational as well... one of my problems when i write songs is actually like encapturing the way i feel at that point in my life... minus the bear does an excellent job of said characteristic i feel... i was looking up their lyrics on songmeanings.net... great site btw... but some people were bashing their lyrics calling them weak and simple... i'll admit... they are pretty simple... but i feel the ability to touch people and relate to your fans through your lyrics is one of/the most important trait of the lyrics... minus the bear definitely fits the bill with me when it comes to that... also been listening to the cure/covers of the cure songs recently too... not too shabby... been writing a lot of different types of songs recently... began scribing a punk song kind of a-la bouncing souls... and like a death metal parady... the song is loosely titled "eat children"... i hope that the lyrics are just so insane that people will know that its a joke... : \... other than that... haven't been doing too hot a job at getting up in the morn... that's gotta change... pocket change... anywho... this is a pretty beastly update and should probably keep you busy for the better part of 2 minutes before you completely forfeit any interest you may have had to begin with... don't know if i told you what the practical joke(s) we played (were going to play) on sara and sara were... i'll pen that in next time regardless... because it was pretty damn funny/peta is going to murder us... i'm outy 5k...
4-8-2076
no YOU'RE out of order!!! another appetizing day at the box office?... how about arousing?... no?... not as arousing as chocolate mouse... sorry if i've seemed like a crab/baby aka little biatch lately... monday night i was doin in-fuckin-credible... than tuesday i was like 'meh... whatever dude'... and i've just been getting progressively worse... kinda like the last 3 seasons of friends... (i don't know that for a fact... but i've heard things... bad things... like talk of count chocolitis...) but last night and today i've just felt like my brain has gone on vaaaacation... fucking costa rica... pueblo de los mariachis... i remember... the alamo... riiiiiight... i wish i was feeling more upbeat and like myself ruther than this downtrodden ass abysmal transformer of a self... now i know what you're thinking... but no... walter cronkite will not participate in the 400m relay for the next summer olympics... anyway... i don't really know what's wrong with me... sometimes i just get in these ridiculous somber moods... i want to snap out of this asap... and snap into a slim jim... oh yeah?... my stomach is giving me problems today too... so i'm thinking about prank calling it or something... that always sets the record straight... i think maybe one of the reasons i haven't been feeling all too chipper is the fact that i am really confused about mucho things... (one being how come some guys have bigger boobies than lots of girls...) that's besides the point though... i am totally crushing for someone... (maybe a girl maybe no lol oh man... no seriously... its a german sheppard... lol j/k... in no way does that reflect on the girl i'm in like with physically or otherwise... and that is in all seriousness... b/c the girl i like is spectacular... stellar even... well i probably can't say all that about her... i don't know her that good... or well?... wishing well... show and tell... ok... (man this is a long side note...) she is gorgeous... but that's not even the best part... although it doesn't hurt... she is high-fucking-larious... and is as cool as/maybe even cooler than... patrick duffy... dare i?... i dare... and i raise you a double trouble dare... i don't want to go into too much more detail... otherwise i'll sound like some kind of sexual preditor or something... and not the kind with the cool dreadlocks... or that preposterous sideways mouth... but she totally rocks my face off) anyway... so you might be asking... if she's soooo frickin' cool... than how comes you feel like shit lemord... too bad my name's dave... well... truth be told... i don't think she feels the same way about me... which is kinda a buzzkill... that and its a very complicated situation... i just want to be my best around her though... and seeing me not be my best around her kills me... and i'm sure it makes her want to injure me or some sort of small woodland creature... but enough about that... the more i dwell the more i feel like hell : O uh-oh... there's a new masta lyricist in town bitches... and he goes by the name 'free willy'... wonka... bitches... crap i need to get food and get out of work... there's highschoolers running around and whoremoans are high... you liked that little play on words eh?... of course you didn't... was kinda cool i saw sara (nate's gf) at work today... she came in to purchase/steal tickets... nate... she's a keeper bro! all my friends deserve awesome girls though... i have the best friends since morris day had the time... but this is a way toooo hugh update... and i'm famished... man i hope i feel more creative and less not-funny soon... : \... i'm out like richie sexson at bat in a clutch situation... i'm not saying the guy chokes but... who am i kidding?... that's exactly what i'm saying... (not sure if i used that closing before but she stills rings true even in today's fast paced ruthless business world...) seriousnessly though... i need food... and more rubberbands...
Da fif bitch!... one two three four FIF...
wwwell lady and gent... i prolly got round bouts 5-10 minutes before they shut this place down... evidently i didn't "comply" with "ethics codes" or "sanitation rules" that the grand township of charaka has... ok... truth time... i'm just at work... aaaagain... fact!... anyway... last night was super duper! oh boy! got to "help" megan with her homework... ha... aka she schooled me in the finer arts of factoring and variables... i haven't really ever got to hang out with her... so that was definately a treat and a half... she's the coolest cool gal i've ever met with a little dash of razz-matazz... ummmm... riiiiiiiiight... that's really all that went down yesterdizzle... boo on mondays... i'm gone from bouts 930am-8pm straight... and if we hit up the bigk... than its more like from 7am-8pm... : \ but i can't complain... i abso-fucking-lutely <3 my exercise class... the greatest thing known to man... other than ... crap... really gotta jet... we'll finish this later... if you know what i mean... : P
April 1
cripes... well man, i've been mr. reliable mcgee when it comes to updating this ol' ditty eh?... anywaysss... i'm at work... again... lots upon tons of crazy/not so crazy but still worthwhile shit's gone down in the past... decade... i don't even know where to begin... or if i can!!! : O oh man... sucks cuz i can't remember any of it either... i seriously can barely remember what happened yesterday... blah... something needs to happen with that already... i guess i'll just start with spring break weekend though... i'm sure as you all know (every 3 people who read this page) i gave up "the juice" for lent... (i realize with this whole baseball controversy you probably take that as a steriods reference... well you're right... : P j/k) juice=alcohol... always + forever... well... we had a small get together on the 19th... the 19th... the 19th?... YOU BET!!! (crappy inside joke... : \) anyway... had a freakin' sweet tiempo!!! (for the last time morty... tiempo is time not temperature) sorry... so that party was killer... josh is now my hero among heroes!!! i think he even surpassed pete sampras in my "all-time greatest people in the history of the world even before there was history" list... which means he now ranks somewhere in between pete and james garner (because he played jim rockford on the rockford files)... that and the people who came up with gak... man... what a f'in concept... its gooey AND you can make it fart and make your hands smell like you stuck them in a urine combine!!!... sorry... that was uncalled for... spring break was great though... i just needed some time to rest and get in touch with my roots... which i'm told trace back to the early paleolithic era... eon... neon... man i'm sure glad i took the geology class... it's really helped out with my... eating habits... ok... back on subject... it was really awesome getting to "hang" or "chill" or "preamble" with amber and rachel over break... great getting to see some peeps from the theater too!!! man i love those extremely underpayed gentleman/gals!!! i think i've decided that i'm going to start calling women either "skirts" or "dames" from now on... lol you wish i was kidding! : P maybe even a well-timed "dollface" or two to bring the house down... ok... but yeah... everyone at the cinema... extraspecially regina... where would i be without you?! probably in the woods next to the racine bike trail waiting to get my hands on some chromies and reflectors!!!... or scruntchies... : \ operation: caramel lischka will resume this summer! ha... got to see j-ball over break too... wish i wouldn't have been such a fuck and called my friend geoff... seriously one of the best kids i've ever known... and probably the only other person in the world i can relate to... scary... but yeah... first week back of school almost done... well done... found out i got an 88 on my 2nd crim-jus exam... i think i'm going to abbr. every word from now on... or just use acranymns... damn i just genocided the fuck out of that word... like it was bbq'in up some steaks on labor day and this clown comes out of nowhere toting a 90210 mobile... the kind you hang over a baby's crib and he was like "let's all pile in to the car" but than the grill flipped over because of an earthquake and the steaks fell on the ground next to ted danson... man... my creativity has really taken a hit this past year... i think its because i have absolutely no energy... ever... and i'm in a constant brain dead/vegetative state... i think everyone knows what that's a reference to... anyway... just started my exercise class up on monday... and got my wilderness survival class today... lol... so if you hear about some devilishly handsome and strapping young man being mauled by a bear... you can bet that was my using somebody in my class as a human shield... ugh... the one thing i haven't been able to not think about lately... how much i still love and miss bobbi... wish that wasn't the case... i just don't know what happened... i know that whoever she's with now will be able to make her happier than i ever could though... and i'm happy for her... i just hope she didn't leave me because she thought i was going to leave her for trisha... because that is not/never would be the case... for those of you who don't know the situation... bobbi and me were talking again over christmas break... and talking about how we both felt that we'll get back together... (not going to go into tons of detail because its really stirring up some great memories...) and my friend trisha asked me if i could go to prom with her because she didn't want to go with her ex and felt that nobody else would go with her... (i used to have a crush on trisha... which was over like 30 gazillion years ago) and i agreed to go as a friend... i told bobbi that trisha asked and that i was going to go as a friend... than trisha asked if i wanted to go a hotel with her and two of her friends after prom... i told her i really wouldn't feel too comfortable going... she said she didn't want to go with me to prom and than have to find somebody else to go with to the hotel... so long story short... i'm not going to prom anymore... (p.s. trisha found a different guy to go like the same day that it was determined that she didn't want to go with me...) if that makes any sense... wow... this has become my fucking autobiography... gah... ashlee simpson... you should eat some salmanella... and mom... if you're reading this... and you thought i said that i gave up alcohol for lent... what you really read was: i like jelly doughnuts but they're really damaging to the economy... yeah... tom brokaw... come back to the nightly news... brian williams is really putting a crimp in my style...
