G RATING - Johnny wiggles his tooth and it comes out.
PG RATING - Johnny wiggles his tooth and it comes out but he screams OUCH!!
PG 13 RATING - He pulls the tooth out as a little blood drips , Johnny screams "SHIT!!"
R RATING - Johnny ties his tooth to a doorknob and slams it , his head flies off , leaving his convulsing body spraying blood on the floor. His parents walk in and commit suicide.
NC 17 - Michael Jackson makes sweet love to that boys beautiful face.
NICK RATING - Perv saves the boy's remains from Jacko , tries to do a favor for family , mails head to grandma. "Sorry for your loss , if it makes you feel better he deserved to die anyway. Seriously all my friends think he's a faggot."
(no offense to homosexuals. the gentleperv supports sexual freedom but gay jokes can be pretty funny and the word faggot though very offensive makes me laugh}
The woman straddles him and kisses his forehead. "Oh thats cute .Did you hear him?"
"What did he say?"asks the man.
"Please don't hurt me" She is thoroughly amused by his torment. "I like him , he's kinda hot."
The man kneels down and touches his face "Yeah , he is. I kinda don't wanna hurt him but at the same time . . ." He smiles at her. His name is Drake and since birth evil always factored into his thoughts. He reflects on his cruelty . . .
Drake in kindergarten. Another kid at the sandbox looks to him " Can I use that shovel after you?" "No"
Drake in high school. A kid has just read her report as the teacher asks for the classes opinion on the paper. One boy answers "It was very good , very informative" Another woman answers next. "Yeah she put a lot of work on it" Its Drakes turn to answer. "It was good , could have been just a little bit better"
Back in present time Drake laughs a hideous evil laugh. "I'm so fuckin evil wahahahahahahaha. I make nice people look mean"
The woman , Fallon , runs her hand down the bound man's back , across an ellaborate full back tattoo of a samurai. "I like it. " She smiles at Drake. "Can I have it?" Drake just smiles and hands her a rusty knife. She waves it in front of his face and laughs. The man's eyes are huge as he cries out in horror.
About a half hour later the two walk out of the toolshed and cuddle under the sunset. "Ever . . . regret things?" Fallon asks. "We can't live like this forever. Eventually we'll get caught and . . . " "I know " he replies. "We . . ." "Is he dead?' "I think so , either that or he passed out" "I thought it would be exciting and its just . . . " "I know. . . just one more honey. One more person to play with than we're through" She holds him tight. "I'm sorry , I guess I'm not into death , just pain. So . . . where's our last person?" "We'll find her , I want a girl next time. We'll find her . . . in Boothbay"
In the heart of Boothbay we find Nick in his apartment bent over a gorgeous redhead's lap. She spanks him with a paddle visciously. Nick turns to the audience "Its my fucking movie , don't question this" His roommates and other friends have just arrived. Josh , Bob , Kev , Jimmy and Tristan are there. Jimmy feels the nicotine urge and steps outside , he slips a little on the last step and starts to lose balance. Everything goes into slow motion "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" After 30 seconds he regains his balance and sits down on the step. "doobeedoodadoo" He pulls out a cigarette but it slips and falls to the ground in slow motion. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" He looks up and sees three people aproach him , Ben ,Erica , and Savannah.
"how's it going , man?" Ben asks.
"Not too bad. " He looks over to Savannah. " Savannah?"
"Yep , just came back from Connecticut for a week"
Ben enters the apartment. "I'll tell Nick you're here."
Meanwhile Fallon and Drake driveby and pull up across the street. Drake's eyes are fixated on Savannah. "Her , I want her." Fallon is a bit jealous. "She is beautiful" She smiles at him than puts on a cute puppy dog face. "Do you like her more than me?" "Yes , now go distract the others."
In the trunk of their car the bound man from before lies motionless , suddenly his fingers twitch.
Fallon walks up to Jimmy. "hi , is it possible for me to use your phone?"" Yeah , sure , come on in" He looks to Erica and Savannah "Come on I'll show you around"
"Exscuse me" says a voice from behind. Savannah turns around to see Drake.. "My wife just went in there right?" "Yeah" "Goddamn it , she thinks the car's broken so she's calling some auto service. All I need is someone to just change gears and stuff while i look under the hood. Think you could help me real quick. If not its okay , I can wait for her to come out" "Its okay , " Savannah says "I can help." She looks to the others. ":I'll be in in a minute"
Fallon has just gotten off the phone and sees Savannah and Drake through the window. She tries to keep the distraction going. "So how do you guys like Boothbay?" Its a varied response. "It sucks" " Not the greatest town" "I want my Star Crunch" "The souls of the innocent will awken the darklord" "My hair's on fire , this afro is too damn big" Nick walks out and heads for the door. "Savannah's here?" "Wait!!" cries Fallon , "ummmm . . ." She can't think of anything to say and shits on the floor. Everyone is disgusted and heads to the door.
Outside Savannah is about to get in the car when she hears a thumping from the trunk. She likes to Drake with fear in her eyes "What's going on?" "Shit!!"
Everyone has steps out and hears the thumping. Fallon screams "No , he's not . . " The trunk bursts open. The man runs out , naked and screaming. Drake quickly pushes Savannah in the car and drives off. The man falls down to his knees in front of Erica and wraps her arms around her. "Help me!!" She screams as she feels his back. Everyone is in shock. His back has been skinned. The man drops to the ground dead. Erica runs over to Fallon and knocks her down. She pulls her hair "You bitch!! Where's Savannah? Where did he take her? If I had a gun right now . . . " Tristan pulls a shotgun out of his beard and gives it to her. He than pulls a danish and a coffee out of his beard and takes a sip. "Mmmm" "where is he taking her?!" Erica screams.
Elsewhere Savannah is thrown to a bed. Drake stands above her with a scalpel. An orgasmic look fills his eyes. Slowly his hand runs up her leg. "You just might enjoy this. You don't know how much pleasure we can experience from pain" Savannah looks at him through terrified eyes.
Just than The door breaks down and Gentleperv and friends show up. The perv roars his anger at the fiend. "ROAR" Tristan is overjoyed and speaks in an English accent. "Splendid , we found her." He does ballet moves than jumps out the window. Fallon stands before Drake. He knows he can't escape and acts out his rage on her. In a flash he's ontop of her , madly cutting with the scalpel. Blood flies up and hits Erica in the face. Drake jumps up and runs over to Savannah with the scalpel. Savannah screams out in fear.
Erica is blinded by the blood but hears her friend scream. She fires and hits Drake , He falls atop Savannah. Everybody rushes over to her and pries the dead man off. "Savannah , are you okay?" "Yeah , I'm fine" She clutches her stomach. I'm so cold. Tristan walks in and gives her his coat. Erica holds her. "We'll get you to a hospital." "NO , please , I just , I just wanna go home"
Gentleperv and friends escort the two home and take off , not knowing what to say.
The next morning Savannah is in bed , wearing nothing but a light bedsheet. Erica walks in. "You feeling better?" Savannah is too sleepy to answer. She gets up and yawns in front of a window. The light is spreading therough the room behind her and from her stomach. Erica is scared but has to know whats going on. She quickly pulls the sheet off and screams. Savannah has a huge hole in her stomach. Its one of those things that disgusts you but intrigues you at the same time like when you have a tummy ache than you take a huge shit and right before you flush you take a peak and you're like oh my god look at that shit , that came outta me? and its like blahhhhhhhh but you're so fucking proud and really you should be , i mean look at the size of that shit thats pretty fuckin amazing. Erica is terrified and disgusted "OH MY GOD!! I'M NEVER USING THAT SHEET AGAIN!!"
Savannah quickly jumps on top of Erica. Please let this lesbo erotic moment higher my ratings for this retarded story. Erica screams. "Please Savannah!! Don't do this!" She is in a rage "Sorry , Savannah died last night. Remember , you shot me!" Savannah claws Erica's face with her fingernails before shoving her fist into her gut and killing her. She stands up and walks over to a mirror. "Actually I should thank you" She looks over at Erica's lifeless body. "I like my new body."
Back at the apartment Josh has an oven mit on. He pulls a sheet of cookies out of the oven. "Oh I do hope everyone enjoys these. I baked them with love." Gentleperv and Bob are helping each other knilt a quilt. "I'm sure there just fine!!" Kev is sitting on the couch with cucumber slices over his eyes. "You guys were right this is opening my pores right up. Jimmy has cotton between his toes as he applies a little nail polish. "I just don't know if this is my color"
Lynnette walks in the door "Hi , guys." Everyone gets rid of the girly stuff and presses play on the tv remote. A hardcore porn comes up. Perv stands up and yells at the screen "YEAH , FUCK HER IN THE ASS!!" Lynnette shakes her head. "Guys are so fucking typical. "