01/April – GC5 Grapevine
Bright Angel to Grandview
37 miles in 74 hours = 1/2 mile per hour (exactly)
Oliver out.
Jeff way out.
Gary out-in-out-in-out.
TomR in.
Mackall in.
Paul in.
Jurisoo in.
Then there were four.
Controversy on T-Minus Day 1
Jurisoo: "We'll meet you in LV at 11AM.
Mackall: "If I have to get up at 2AM, you guys should be at
the airport earlier. Come on, you can do better than that."
Paul, Chevy Van again? "Come on, you can do better than that"
Is this door broken? Another defective Chevy Vachal car.
What time is it? When is DST? Where is MST? Is AZ in DST?
Made the rim by 5:30PM. BC office closed.
Costume clad ranger babe pulls off wig.
Water everywhere but Cremation Creek. Yahoo!
The Grand is as grand as ever.
Tu-sigh'-an or Tu-see-an. Zonies say it different.
Four guys in one room.
You couldn't do better than that...well you could.
We cook pasta and pizza.
You couldn't do better than that...well you could.
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GC5-D1 (11+ miles): Bright Angel trail to
Phantom Ranch via the Tonto/Kaibab.
Great night's sleep. Yeah right.
Open that window, now. Leave it open. Pee-U.
Cold morning as usual.
No hotcakes? No pastries? Potato cakes for $1.50?
Bearded lady? The McDonald's tradition is in jeopardy.
Fred Harvey comes through with an awesome shuttle.
3 degrees every 100 feet? Are you sure? Hmmm.
Time to go down. Lift 'em.
Suicidal mule.
Familiar cowgirl.
DP1 (Decision Point)- Tonto west trail. Easy way or hard/Jurisoo way?
Burrow spring lives up to its name.
Water everywhere but not a drop to drink.
DP2 - Skip the water cache. Head to The Tipoff.
Scrub brush a little nasty on the shins.
Dikes around every corner.
"The Tonto is flat"
Kaibab trail is a welcome site. At first.
Down down down down. This is one long ass day.
Camp at last.
Same site as Jurisoo's first GC trip. (GC0)
Conversation begins to get crude.
No river cleansing. Lazy hikers. The creek will do.
Happy hour. Who spilled that glass of wine?
"You can do better than that"
Global Star only works if you know the phone number.
Linda and Jacob will have to wait.
Awesome burritos and guacamole salsa dip. Worth every pound.
Time to "party at the bar".
Mackall's not drinking? Will the sun rise from the west?
Strip poker? Which tent is she staying in?
That was "Dave's Day". Tomorrow is not about him.
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GC5-D2 (11+ miles): Boulder Canyon via Kaibab to the Tonto
Pinch a loaf, drop a log, lighten the load.
Lift 'em.
Time to go up. Way up.
Its a freeway. Can't wait to get on the "flat" Tonto.
The Tipoff again. That was one long water stop.
Conversation gets more crude. Ex-girlfriends. "10"
Where is the water? Lets split up. Paul goes up the creek.
We find a puddle of water down the creek. Time to pump.
Where's Paul? Organize a search party.
Distribute radios. Look for the body.
Penalty: carry the radio.
"The canyon is tough"
"The hole is tough"
"The hole is a bitch"
"The ho is a bitch".
Is this a two finger Ho?
"The Tonto is flat."
Where are the planes? Is the world still there?
Does my Butte look big to you?
Pattie's Butt looks big.
There's a plane. We're OK.
Boulder Creek. Small panic about water.
There's plenty here in this puddle.
Carry 6 quarts or die.
"Lets get to the rim. Its flat there with a view of the river."
"Jurisoo this is not your day. We're stopping here."
All the days are Dave's.
Now this is camping. No humans. Perfect temp. Beautiful sunset.
Half the water carried is for 151 Gatorum.
Paul's creamy tuna pasta dish couldn't be better. Period.
He actually brought enough this time.
The conversation becomes incredibly crude.
Where is Gary to control it?
Call the "10". Oops...the Irish guy answers.
Paul is so drunk he sets the tent up on rocks.
Paul doesn't realize he's uncomfortable till 3AM.
Paul sleeps on chair tarps. The great innovator.
TomR and Tom under the stars.
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GC5-D3 (11+ miles): Tonto Trail to Horseshoe Mesa
What a sunrise!
Time to take the walk. Let it go.
"Its great dumping where no man has dumped before"
"This day is not about Dave"
Lift 'em. Go for the Grapevine.
"Next time we are staying here above the River."
"There won't be a next time"
The conversation reaches even cruder levels.
It must be because of TomR.
"The mother of all finger canyons"
Another finger, another finger, and another finger.
The mother. Seems to never end.
Grapevine creek? This is the primary source for water? Geez.
Get enough to make Cottonwood. I'll take a little extra.
First humans in 24 hours.
Tae-Va chick and guy says Cottonwood has water!
Dump a few quarts.
Tom declares lunch. TomR finds better spot.
Tom doesn't care. He's on his own.
Paul has happiest moment in the ho throwing rocks.
Paul will cherish the moment in fear of never enjoying the ho again.
TomR comes from behind like the Yankees to win the rock target shoot out.
Cottonwood in sight. We might not make Horseshoe.
Seed: "We're eating at Wendy's tomorrow"
"McDonald's is out"
Cottonwood water is raging, well its more like a trickle.
DP3: Stay here or go up? Again, its Jurisoo's day.
Up we go. Up up up with 6-8 liters/quarts apiece.
This Cottonwood campsite sure is tempting.
"This trail is all about Dave"
It couldn't be much worse. Loose rock. Steep. Switchbacks. Yikes.
Up up up up.
Another group sited. Why would you go down this trail?
Horseshoe at last. We did the right thing.
A little cool, but nothing like weather.com
We'll move again for TomR.
Freeze dried food better for crotch warming than eating.
Jurisoo eats like a pig.
Seed: "We're eating at Wendy's tomorrow"
Not enough Vodka and Tang. Oh well.
Smores for everyone. You can't do better than that. Well..
That darn moon is too bright. TomR needs a tarp moonblock.
Mackall sees more shooting stars than ever. Probably because he's sober.
8PM. Time to hit the hay/rock.
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GC5-D4 (3 miles): Grandview
5AM. Wide awake.
Paul dumps before Jurisoo? Wow.
Paul is still King of the Trowel.
This composting toilet is almost full. No room for Tom's log.
Lift 'em.
Seed: "We're eating at Wendy's tomorrow"
2500' up. Repeat of GC5's final push.
Forgot how steep it is.
Let Jurisoo go. This is his day.
Give him a radio, but not the car keys.
9:40AM at the top.
Indian family gathers around the Team.
Pictures and "video interview" of Tom.
We are considered gods in their culture.
We ARE gods in our mind.
Time for the toast.
Four guys. Seven Guinness'. You couldn't do better than that. Well..
"We're eating at Wendy's. Period"
Major shower. Record dirt level.
Wendy's is the new tradition.
William's gas 50 cents higher than Tusayan? Fill it up at $1.80.
On the road to Henderson.
Hold Paul down as we cross the Dam.
Mackall's in-laws are here somewhere.
Jacob and Linda ready to go. Fill up the van with more stuff.
Stuck in 2 hours of traffic north of Baker.
We could have done better that that.
What a great way to end it all.
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Conclusion:
The fastest group ever. Maybe too fast.
We need to smell the roses next time, but lets not get carried away.
Paul: Thanks for your transpiration services, great listening
skills, excellent dinner, patience, and crude sense of humor.
TomR: Thanks for your Global Star services, water pumping skills,
ex-girlfriend stories, patience, and crude sense of humor
TomM: Thanks for your permit planning services, harassment
services, patience, and "beyond crude" sense of humor.
DavidJ: Thanks for pushing these guys harder than they think they can go.
Great trip. A 37 mile epic. Bring on GC6! Long live the Ho!
djj
Added:
- Paul....he's one handsome man!!
- Dave, I think you are at least a "52"
- C & H, don't try this at home.
- Never promise to call your wife when you know you are going to be in a ho!