sciencedos

Update 1
November 17th
DAY 3

         It has been 3 days of no shampoo and everything seems to be OK at this point. My hair actually has a silky sheen to it that I might just be able to get used to. No noticeable changes in stupidity levels at this time. I didn't really even watch that much TV in the last couple of days due to introducing nearly lethal amounts of prescription pain killers into my system over my two days off of work. It was near impossible to concentrate on anything as complex as a television while in this state of hyper non-activity.
          I am actually kind of enjoying not using shampoo. I have always liked to be dirty and this just reminds me of my youthful days in the early 21st century. It also cuts down on shower time considerably, leaving me much needed extra time to concentrate my washing on my butt and/or feet.
          That's all for the update at this time. I don't have a whole lot to report right now. I'll check back in a few days with an update.

stupidity before-------------------------------------------

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current stupidity-------------------------------------------------
(slightly higher at this time due to 2 days of drug comsuption)

Update Dos
November 23rd
DAY 9

         I am now at day nine ( as indicated above ) of the shampoo/TV experiment and things are turning out to be very interesting indeed. I am finding at this point that not only can I see through the utter stupidity that is television, I am beginning to see through other things that I did not realize were quite as stupid as I thought they were before. These items include, but are not limited to, weather patterns, non Kentucky made whiskeys, really big dogs, the other people that share the roadways with me, hippies, modern mainstream heavy metal music, bottled alcoholic beverages that have a fruit like flavoring, pot, people from Virginia, people that name their kids "Craig", brief style underwear, Keanu Reeves, Republicans, Avril Lavigne, walkie-talkies, cheerleading competitions (and those who consider cheerleading a sport), Thanksgiving, people who say interracial relationships are, and I quote, "just ain't right, man", people who don't like sporks, people who ask if The Lord of the Rings is based on a true story (see "random shit" page), ravers, the entire state of Pennsylvania, not being able to buy 40s and 22s due to stupid laws, cops, Eminem, people who want to tell you about Jesus, Jesus, Star Trek, neo-nazi's, regular old run of the mill nazi's, radio stations, Carson Daly, M tv, At The Drive-In for breaking up, Phish for getting back together, people who don't like my dog and last but certainly not least: hunting.
          Now, I did know before I began this experiment that these things were all pretty stupid in their own special ways. I am not completely sure yet if finding these things to be even more stupid has anything to do with shampoo products as of yet. I hope to have a more definitive answer by the time the experiment has ended.
          Check back soon for more updates.

stupidity before--------------------------------------------

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current stupidity-----------------------------------------

(my stupidity seems to have tapered off a bit, hard to say what the reason for this is at this time, NEED MORE RESEARCH!)

Update III
November 29th
Day 15

I have had an epiphany. Whilst checking my dog Zazu's testicles for fleas earlier today, I realized two indisputable facts:

A) Zazu does not bathe very often

B) Zazu never watches television

       How could I have been so blind? A veritable gold mine of information right under my nose the entire time! Now the argument can be made that Zazu is just a dog, of course, that his brain works quite differently from human brains and an entirely different experiment would have to be performed on him to get any substantial data relating to my project. I say to this, "Yeah, well fuck you." I believe quite a bit can be learned from Zazu in this matter. I believe his brain is similar enough to mine (shit, set myself up on that one) to where, in an experiment of this kind, being shampoo-based, our findings would be very similar indeed.
          So Zazu is now officially part of the project and will be referred to during experimentations as "Professor Leone'." As to not make him feel like an outsider or singled out, I shall apply the codename: "Recondo" to myself. I was going to give him a bath tomorrow but I will now hold off for another 15 days when Phase 1 of the project is finished. I have instructed him to avoid getting any cleaner than he normally would throughout the duration of this time. When Phase 2 begins and I switch to the opposite approach of excessive shampooing, I will bathe Professor Leone' about twice as much as I normally would, which means he'll be getting about 2-3 baths next month. He has agreed to all of this and has signed all the proper consent forms and waivers. He is happy.
          As far as everything else goes on my end. I am now half-way through Phase 1 and all seems well. I have had no noticable side-effects or other disagreeable feelings other than having just plain old dirty hair. Luckily my hair is short and I never had to use a whole awful lot of shampoo in the first place. The television end of it has continued much like last weeks update. T.V. really SUCKS! There is rarely anything satisfying and/or informative about it in most generalized cases. Just a load of SHIT. That is all for the update for this week. Next update will be very exciting indeed as we have 2 very different perspectives on the whole mess with the addition of Prof. Leone''s data. Buenes tardes fuck face!

No "stupidity graph" this week. It's a pretty stupid idea anyways. Maybe I'll put one up at the end of Phase 1 for reference.

Update 4
December 25th
Day 41

         I have fucked this whole thing up. I was, as previously stated, supposed to start PHASE 2 of the experiment 11 days ago. Unfortunatly, I had to attend court on the 11th of this month for my big, dumb D.U.I. and had to shave my head due to having pink hair, having been the result of a dying mishap. I didn't really want to go before the judge with pink hair, especially in this fucking sorry ass, redneck town I currently reside in. I'm sure in a place of this kind the judge is a complete fascist, racist, homophobe who just might have interpreted my having pink hair as me being "one of those damn, dirty faggots!".
          Anyway, all of this has destroyed the experiment. I probably should have thought this out a little better. I still have not used shampoo but I have no hair to wash now. I will have to wait this thing out for a little while before beginning PHASE 2, at least until I grow some hair to wash.
          As for Prof. Leone's progress, I have noticed he still does not watch much television at all. I will continue to monitor his behavior and extend his participation in PHASE 1 as he did start late into the process anyway.
          I will update this as soon as my hair grows long enough to shampoo so I can begin PHASE 2 of excessive shampooing. Fuck.

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