Love Doesn't Ask Why

Part 29

(doesn’t think twice) doesn’t think twice
** love doesn’t ask why - celine dion **

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Scene: - Joey and Pacey’s apartment. It’s Monday just after lunch time. Pacey has just come in from doing some shopping and Joey is in the bedroom.

As he entered the apartment he could hear her rustling about in their bedroom. "Hey Joey, how come you’re not at work?" He called to her as he placed the grocery bag down on the kitchen counter.

She called to him from the bedroom. "I had to get some stuff ready."

"What for?" He asked as he came back into the sitting room.

Joey then walked out of their room carrying some bags. "I’m leaving." She told him. "Pacey we never should have been together. It’s over."

He looked at her confused. "Yes we should have been together and we still should."

"You don’t know that." She said putting the bags down on the sofa.

"Tell me how I can fix this. Tell me how we can change this."

"We can’t." She told him shaking her head. "It’s too far gone for us to fix anything. And if you knew the truth you would think differently."

"Tell me how I’d think differently?"

She was silent for a moment, contemplating what to say next. "You where right you know?"

"When?"

"Not telling me about Dawson and Gretchen."

Pacey looked at her shocked. "He told you didn’t he? When you saw him in LA."

"No he didn’t. Bessie told me after it happened"

"You just didn’t tell me you knew?"

"You didn’t either." She retorted. "And you where right not to tell me for the reason you did. Because it’s true...I might have just left you."

Pacey looked at her in disbelief. "Is that why you’re leaving me? Because I lied to you seven years ago."

She shook her head. "No, I have to stop lying to people. I’ve told so many lies over the past few years. You, me, Dawson...but it stops now. It stops today."

"What lies?" Pacey asked her.

"I want to tell you the truth but I’ve hurt you too much already. I don’t want to hurt you anymore." She told him.

"You’re already too late for that, you want to leave me remember? Maybe telling me will allow us to start again." He said shrugging his shoulders and throwing his arms in the air, asshe shook her head at him. "Stop shaking your head at me and tell me!"

"Pacey..."

"I want to know why you think you have to leave." Pacey pleaded, his voice slightly raised.

"Are you sure you want to hear the truth?" She asked him as she started to pace up and down in front of the sofa. "Because I’m not sure that you’ll be able to handle it!"

"Tell me."

"Okay then." She said as she stopped walking. "You weren’t my first!"

"Excuse me?"

"I said you weren’t my first, Dawson was...his last night in Capeside."

"Oh shit!"

"Then about six weeks later I...I realised that I was pregnant." Joey informed him as tears welled in her eyes. "And a few weeks later...I had a miscarriage."

"Oh." That’s all that he could say. Part of him wanted to wrap his arms around her and another part wanted to... "Does he know?"

"He came to see me, he stayed a few days but then I told him to go."

"Aunt Beth’s?"

She nodded her head. "I should have told you the truth then. We never should have been together, Pacey. That’s why I have to leave. I’m sorry that I hurt you."

"You don’t have to leave." He told her, a hint of emotion creeping into his voice as he stood before her. "I forgive you!"

"I’m sorry Pacey, but I can’t stay with you."

"But I love you."

"It’s not enough for me, Pacey. And even if it was, I can’t return it. Not in the way it should be returned. Time has made me see that."

He touched her cheek and she flinched at the movement. "I have to go in to the hospital to work but can’t we at least sleep on it and talk about this tomorrow morning?"

"I won’t be here." She said as she put on her coat. "Seven years ago I was close to giving up Worthington to be with him in LA. I have to start listening to what my heart says. Pacey, I can’t keep bottling things up. I have to start living for me."

"Why are you doing this all of a sudden? Why not a year ago? Why not six months ago?"

"Because things are different now!"

"I thought that you where going to stop lying to people!" He reiterated.

"I started to realise that I didn’t love you the way that I should, that it was the way that you would love a friend. I really thought that I could make myself love you in the way that I should love you. And for a while I thought that I did. For a while that was enough for me."

"But now it’s not?" He asked, shoulders raised.

"No. I realised it’s not how it should be and it never will." She stated as she took off the ring he had given her only a few months ago.

"As long as you hang onto the ghost of Dawson Leery!?!"

"It’s not just the ghost, I still love him. I never stopped." She then put the engagement ring down on the coffee table. "And you have to start living the life that you should have been living for the past eight years. You deserve to be loved by someone who can love you the same way that you’ll love them."

"I still think that we should try again."

"There’s no point, Pacey." She said, shaking her head. "There’s no point."