Love Doesn't Ask Why
Part 11
Author's note: Most of the Joey's journal entry that features in this part is not written by me. It is taken from the 'movie' "destination anywhere" that was made to promote Jon Bon jovi's second solo album of the same title. It's not all me.
when you feel all alone
Scene: - Joey’s room (Boston). One month later.
JOEY: "Well Gail did say to write it down if I found that I couldn’t say it. So here goes."
Scene: - Potter B & B. Bessie is reading Joey’s letter.
to tame your wild, wild heart
Dear Bessie
when darkness is upon your door
let me be the one you call
By the time Bessie had finished reading Joey’s journal entry she was crying. Should she send this to him? Give him a glimpse of what Joey had been feeling when she had told him to leave. Let him have a chance to understand her reasoning. She’d have to think about it.
Scene: - The Leery’s. A few days later.
if you need to fall apart
There is a knock at the door and Mitch answers it.
BESSIE: "Hi Mitch. Is Gail in?"
MITCH: "Yes, I’ll just get her. Come on in."
As Bessie goes into the living room Mitch goes up the stairs to get Gail. A few minutes later Gail enters the living room.
when you feel all alone
GAIL: "Hi Bessie. How are you?"
BESSIE: "I’m fine. And you?"
GAIL: "I’m fine although at six months Lily is already playing up. So what can I do for you?"
BESSIE: "I got this the other day from Joey. It explains a little of why she sent Dawson away, but mostly it says how she feels. I think that Dawson should see it. Maybe allow him to understand Joey. I wanted to see if you thought that it was a good idea."
Gail takes the journal entry from Bessie and reads it. She too has tears in her eyes when she finishes reading it.
let me be the one you call
BESSIE: "So what do you think?"
GAIL: "I think that he should read this. If you want I’ll make sure that he gets it."
BESSIE: "Thanks."
and fly away with you into the night
Scene: - A few days later. - Dawson’s apartment. Dawson gets a letter from Gail.
I can mend a broken heart
Dear Dawson
Dawson opens the other piece of paper that came with his letter and starts to read it.
and when it’s over you’ll breathe again
when you feel all alone
let me be the one you call
Dear Journal
lift you up and fly away with you into the night
For the next few months Joey just immersed herself in college work and spending time with Pacey. The only time that she ever really thought about what had happened and Dawson was whenever she was on her own, any other time she managed to block it out. As for Dawson, well he more or less did the same. Although he just immersed himself in college work, new friends and LA. He was relieved that Gretchen was gone because now he didn’t have to pretend anything.
if you need to fall apart
For thanksgiving Dawson stayed in LA and his parents and Lily came to visit him. Joey went home to Capeside and part of her hoped that Dawson would be there. When she found out that he wasn’t there she was a little disappointed. She knew that Dawson and Gretchen had split up, Bessie had told her but Pacey hadn’t mentioned it yet. And he was probably right not to. For Christmas Dawson went home to Capeside but Joey wasn’t there, she was in Ohio with Aunt Beth. They both miss each other.
and the world has turned it’s back on you
give me a moment please
I know you feel like the walls are closing in on you
it’s hard to find relief
and people can be so cold
I know that we speak to each other every few days on the phone and we’ve probably spoken to each other since I’ve written this. But it’s something I have to do. Gail once said to me that if I found that I couldn’t say how I felt then I should write it down. So I’ve put what I was feeling in with this letter, because then I’ve shared it with someone else. Thanks for being there for me and I’ll speak to you soon.
Love Joey.
and you feel like you can’t take anymore
if you jump I’ll break your fall
lift you up and fly away with you into the night
I can mend a broken heart
if you need to crash, then crash and burn
you’re not alone
and a loyal friend is hard to find
you’re caught in a one way street
with the monsters in your head
when hopes and dreams are far way and
you feel like you can’t face the day
if you jump I’ll break your fall
lift you up
if you need to fall apart
if you need to crash, then crash and burn
you’re not alone
cause there has always been heartache and pain
Bessie got this from Joey the other day and thought that you should have it. I agreed.
Mom
you’ll breathe again
and the world has turned it’s back on you
give me a moment please
to tame your wild, wild heart
if you jump I’ll break your fall
lift you up and fly away with you into the night
if you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
if you need to crash, then crash and burn
you’re not alone
let me be the one you call
if you jump I’ll break your fall
It’s winter now, it’s icy fingers reach beneath the frame of one solid door. Beneath the blanket that shrouds our bed, into the ventricles of my heart. All colour is frozen out. My face grey, the streets grey, the voices that creep through the phone lines grey. No sap runs through me, no current of life. And I am forever surrounded by darkness. Like this baby has been stolen from me, and I have been exiled to hell. And I condemn the world to perpetual winter. At night I hear my baby in my dreams. ‘Mommy’ it’s voice echo’s through the dark and I rise to go to it. My feet grey on the ice slicked floors of the house. I run from room to room but every one is empty. The walls draped in frost. I hear it calling ‘mom I’m stuck and I can’t get out, I’m trapped here’. And there he stands like a frigid God. ‘Let me help you’ he says, ‘I want to help you through this’. But that’s not really what I hear. When he speaks all I hear is ‘Let go’. ‘You’ve got to learn to accept’. But it’s not his womb that’s turned to glacier. Our baby never lived inside his body as it did in mine. And it still does. It’s heart will never beat again unless I breathe. A baby cries until it’s mother holds it. A mother holds her baby until the winter thaws.
Joey.
if you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
if you need to crash, then crash and burn
you’re not alone
let me be the one you call
if you jump I’ll break your fall(you’re not alone)
lift you up and fly away with (no no) you into the night (never alone)
I can mend a broken heart (you’re not alone)
if you need to crash, then crash and burn (if you need to crash and burn)
you’re not alone
let me be the one you call
if you jump I’ll break your fall
lift you up and fly away with you into the night
if you need to fall apart (you’re not alone)
I can mend a broken heart (no, no)
if you need to crash (never alone)
then crash and burn
you’re not alone
let me be the one you call
if you jump I’ll break your fall
** crash and burn - savage garden**