blondes

Blonde Jokes

    A blonde, a brunette and a redhead all work in the same office for a female boss who always
goes home early.
      "Hey girls," the brunette says "let's all go home early tomorrow, she'll never know."
        So the next day, the brunette gets some gardening done, the redhead goes to a bar, and the blonde comes home only to find her husband having sex with her boss. She quietly sneaks out of the house, and returns at her normal time.
     "That was fun." says the brunette, "We need to do that again sometime"
       "No." says the blonde, "the boss almost caught me."

     A young ventriloquist is turing the clubs and one night he's doing a show full of his usual blonde jokes.
      Suddenly a blonde on the fouth row stands up in anger.
      "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes! What makes you think you can stereotype women that way! The color of someone's hair has nothing to do with who they are! It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected!"
      Frightened, the young ventriloquist starts to apologize, when the blonde yells, "You stay out of this mister! I'm talking to the little jerk on your knee!"

to go back to home page...

   A blonde suspects that her boyfriend is cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun.
    She goes to his apartment that same day, with the gun in hand. Sure enough, when opens the door, she finds her boyfriend in the arms of a redhead. She points the gun at her boyfriend and stares at him for a moment. Then, suddenly, she's overcome with grief, so she puts the gun up to the side of her head.
     Her boyfriend screams, " Honey, don't do it..."
     The blonde yells back, " Shut up! You're next!"

    An older guy comes home in the middle of the day to find his young, blonde wife standing in the middle of thier flooded deluxe apartment wearing only a G-string and high heels.
     "What happened here?" he asks. " The entire apartment is flooded!"
     " I think the waterbed burst, " she explains.
     Just the a naked guy floats by.
     "Who's that?" demands the husband.
     "I dunno. Must be a lifeguard."

Eleven people were clinging precariously to a wildly swinging rope suspended from a crumbling outcropping on Mount Everest. Ten were blonde, one was a brunette.
As a group, the decided that one of the party should let go. Otherwise, the rope would break and everyone would perish.
For an agonizing few moments, no one volunteered.
Finnally, the brunette gave a truly touching speech, saying she would sacrifice herself to save the lives of the others.
The ten blondes applauded.

...........