Spike drove back into Sunnydale revving the engine of his motorcycle. He took one last drag on his ciggarette before he tossed it. William the Bloody was back. He'd been gone for 3 months, traveling from one city to the next. Just drinking, smoking and having lots of sex. Life had been good but eventually, he couldn't hide any longer.

Nothing could make him forget Buffy. He'd screwed many girls but every one looked like Buffy in his mind. She was everything Spike wanted. He didn't know if it was love or if it was lust. But the feelings he had were overpowering and he had to coem back. To confront her one last time. To try to woo her one last time.

He pulled up to his old crypt and jumped off the bike. The place was exactly the same way he had left it. Broken glass everywhere from his last temper tantrum he had thrown. He walked over to the hole in the floor and climbed down to the lower level. The place was still trashed.

"Suprise, suprise," Spike muttered kicking a pillow out of his way as he made his way towards the bed. "The slayer probably didn't even notice I was gone."

He layed down and stared up at the ceiling. He couldn't decide if he should go find the slayer on tonights patrol or give it another day.

"What the hell, I've never been known for my patience," he said sitting up. He was making his way through the cemetary when he heard Red arguing with someone.

"I almost had him and then you had to run in like some hereo," Willow yelled pushing Xander.

"I thought he was going to bite you and that's all we need again," Xander said holding up his hands. "Lets go report in to Giles."

Spike stepped out of the shadows. "Well, well, well. Patrolling for the Slayer. What, does she have a date or something?"

"Great, Spike's back," Xander said sarcastically. "Lets throw a party."

"Shut up ya wanker. I wasn't talking to you," Spike said turning to Willow. "So where is the slayer then Red?"

Willow sighed. "Spike, you don't understand. You've been gone a long time. Things aren't the same anymore."

"Buffy," Spike said slowly. "She's not...not-she's not."

"Oh now SPike, she's still here. She's at home," Willow said quickly.

Spike turned to leave. "Great, Spike's going to turn into Buffy's stalker again."

"Sod off," Spike said without stopping.

Willow slapped Xander's arm. "Why do you have to be such a jerk? Spike's coming back might be a good thing. Buffy obviously hasn't been benefitting from our help."

"I don't care what you say. Spike's being bck can't be a good things. All he does is cause trouble," Xander said leading the way out of the cemetary.

"I think you're wrong about him. HE's a nice guy, and he truly cares about Buffy," Willow said.

"I still think we should use caution when allowing Spike around us. He's been gone 3 months, we have no idea where he's been or what he's done," Xander pointed out.

"I guess but I still like him," Willow said shrugging her shoulders. "But we better hurry and meet Giles. HE'll want to hear about this Spike being back thing." Xander nodded and they both hurried to the Magic Box.

Dawn closed the basement door before she felt her eyes tear up again. It was always like this, since Buffy's change. Nothing was the same. Everybody was sad and nobody would talk about it. And it was pissing Dawn off.

Buffy was different. Forever. They couldn't change that and they all kenw that. It was like they were scared. But Dawn couldn't handle it anymore. She needed to talk it out.

She was going to head upstairs when the doorbell rang. "God what now?" she asked to herself. Everybody she knew entered without knocking. She opened the door and almost started crying again. "Spike."

"Nibblet, it's been awhile," Spike said softly before giving her a big hug. "I missed you."

"Where'd you go?" Dawn asked drawing him into the living room. "We were so worried. It was like you dropped off the face of the planet."

"I went everywhere. I just needed to get away. Things got complicated and I needed to escape," Spike admitted. He gave Dawn a small smile before continuing. "But now I'm back at least for a little while anyways."

"I wish you'd stay. You were so different from the others," Dawn said laying her head down on the back of the couch.

"The others?" Spike said confused.

"Angel, Parker, and Riley," Dawn explained. "They all eventually leave her. It doesn't matter who the guy is, they leave."

Spike closed his eyes. "Is that what she thinks? That I left her."

"Isn't that what you did?" Dawn asked softly. "Left because Buffy couldn't admit to loving you."

"She doesn't love me Dawn. I'm a monster and she can't except that. And she shouldn't have to," Spike said. His voice was full of pain and a little regret.

*That might not be an issue anymore* Dawn thought to herself. "Buffy's different now Spike."

"What do you mean different?" Spike asked staring at her intensely.

"Just different," Dawn said watching Spike stand up and make his way towards the stairs. "She's not up there." At his curious stare she stood up and made her way to the basement door. "She moved down to the basement about a month ago."

"Why?" Spike asked walking up behind her.

"That question would best be answered with you seeing her for yourself." Dawn led him down the rickety old stairs. It was dark with only one lamp on. It wasnt' the nicest of all places, only one step above his dank crypt. He didn't see her right away but then saw her sitting on the small twin bed, flipping through some pictures.

She didn't even look up even though she had to know someone had come down there. She had lost weight and her hair looked stringy and greasy almost. And she wasn't full of life like before. She was different. Almost like...

"Bloody hell," Spike whipsered. "She's a...a"

"Vampire," Dawn supplied. "Yeah, about a month ago. We only know the basics. She was surrounded by a group and one bit her. She hasn't talked about it since and hasn't patrolled since it either. She's changed so much but won't talk about it. Xander moved in and began helping. Buffy hasn't left the house at all." Dawn sat down on the bottom step. "I'm scared, not for me but for her. I want her back. I need her back. Can you help her?"

Spike stared at Buffy in shock. This was the woman he loved. The vibrant slayer that vampires across the world came to kill. She couldn't kill a bug right now.

"I don't know Nibblet. I don't know," he said walking up the stairs into the kitchen.

"Can't you try, please, if you love her as much as you say you do, you'll help her," Dawn said beginning to cry. "Just help her."

Spike pulled her into a hug. "I can't promise anything luv but I'll talk to her." He went to the fridge and opened the door, grabbed a thing of blood. "Go to bed, I'll talk to you tomorrow."

Dawn nodded and hurried out of the room. Spike took a deep breath and walked down the stairs one more time. This was the hardest thing he would have to. The slayer hadn't listened to him before this, why should she start now?

Spike crouched down to her level by the bed. "Buffy," he said softly. "Buffy can you talk to me?"

She didn't look up, just kept flipping through the pictures.

"Buffy, can you answer me one question? Just one luv, please," he said softly. Why? Why luv?"

"You left," she said softly. "That night I went to your crypt and you were gone. I sent you away." She tossed the pictures across the room. "I send everybody away but that's okay. It doesn't matter anymore. Nothing matters anymore."

Spike watched as she closed her eyes. "No luv, you can't do this right now. We need to talk."

"Don't want to talk," Buffy said crawling to the top of the bed and she layed down.

"Buffy, when's the last time you've eaten," Spike said standing up.

"Some chips this morning," she mumbled.

"Not food, but blood Buffy," he said.

"Never, I don't drink blood!" Buffy yelled sitting up. "I don't drink blood!"

"You're a bloody vampire Buffy. You need blood to survive. To live Buffy," Spike said holding out the packet of blood.

"Don't you get it!" Buffy yelled. "I'm not alive, I'm dead. But this time I can't end up in Heaven. I'm stuck here and I'm dead. Dead," Buffy said beginning to cry.

Spike glared at her. "That's great, that's just great. The bloody slayer is going to have a friggen Pity Party."

"The slayer, I'm not the slayer anymore. I'm what the Slayer hunts. What the Slayer kills. I'm not a slayer, I'm the slayee," Buffy said glaring right back at him.

"That's what this is all about. You are mad that you became what you are suppose to hunt." Spike began to pace. "Well call me stupid but I say this gives you a clear advantage. You know what runs through a vampires mind. What they think, how they act. This could make you stronger, if you let it. You have to except it. Except it." When Buffy just sat there staring at him, he smiled. "You have to except it luv. Life handed you a raw deal. It's not fair and you have every right to piss and moan. But you aren't that kind of girl. You're stronger than taht Buff. Better than that. So c'mon pet, drink this. You'll feel better."

Buffy stood up and walked over to him. Spike, will you help me?" She took the packet from him but just stared it. She could taste it already. Her mouth was salivating in anticipation. She knew Dawn and her friends had been putting blood on her food and in her drinks, but this would be the first time she'd be drinking it alone.

"Drink up Slayer," Spike said pushing it towards her face. He smiled when she bit into the bag of blood and made some noises in the back of her throat as she sucked it down.

Even as a vampire, Buffy was beautiful. She was amazing. He watched as she wiped her mouth and froze. She turned to hide her face. "Don't luv, never hide from me. You're beautiful."

Buffy's face morphed back into her normal face but she still wouldn't face him.

"I jsut can't get use to this. It's been a month," Buffy said moving back to the bed. "I just want it back."

"What back?"

"My life, she said laying down. "I want it back."

Spike walked back to the steps. "Well Pet, this is your life now. And you can do great things wit hthis one." He stepped onto the first step. "I'll be back tomorrow night."

"Spike," Buffy said softly.

"Yeah luv," he said stopping.

"I'm not your pet," she said before rolling over and facing the wall.

"That's what you think," Spike said chuckling. "Bye luv."

Buffy closed her eyes and just barely kept her mouth shut from telling him to stay. Life was so complicated. 5 months ago, she would have kicked his ass for even showing up but now his presence was a comofort. Go figure.