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| THE REVEREND FREDDIE JOHNSTON: He'll marry ya, he'll bury ya, and he'll carry ya into musical bliss. An ordained reverend, watch and listen to his gospel according to rock n' roll. A man who likes to pull it to the side and ask that the good spirits enter your body. Single handedly responsible for the largest single bar tab in history! He drove a brown Chevy van better known as the "Brown Bean" and as the "Hevy Van" right into the ground. Now he drives a gay green luxury van . The "high priest" of fruit blended drinks and red socks. Alias: Rev. Jack Daniels; Tip-toe Freddie; Johnston! The Leak. Past and present musical projects and associations: Green Apple Splash, The New Buckaroos, Thundershack, Free Beer Band, Butt Ugly, Hot Karl Jr. Hellhounds, Cheap Shotz. FAMOUS QUOTE "I lost my van" |
| STEVEN CREW.: More affectionately known as "Steve F**king Crew" or S.F.C. for the politically correct. The undisputed world champ of "the shuffle". The human metronome is also one heck of a hockey player. This "band slut" plays absolutely every style of music known to man. He's especially fond of long walks on the beach, drinking Coke straight from the can and watching old Benny Hill re-runs. Andy is his favourite Bee Gee. Alias: "Steve F**king Brew; The Colonel, El Nucho, NUCHEE!" Past and present musical projects and associations: Lot 49, Adam West, Julia Propeller, The New Buckaroos, Skirt Rattlers, Sweet Leaf Garrett, Green Apple Splash, Chris Hart Band, Tim "E" and the Yes Men, Black Donellys, Electric Bananas, Great Uncles, Roy LeBlanc, (Fill-in for Black Holes) FAMOUS QUOTE "You're FIRED" |
| JEFFY B: The hardest working man in showbiz. No really! This guy is a human juke box. A guitar wiz and a recent mandolin virtuoso. He sounds like "Speedo" from Rocket From the Crypt but he doesn't know that. Jeffy loves hot sauce on everything! Has the eerie ability to remember the words to old 80's new wave and mullet metal tunes. A proud supporter of the Detroit Lions and thier woes. Looks like a southern U.S. Marshall in a cowboy hat. Alias: "Jeffy B-EER, Jeffy Garrett, JEFFY!,Jeffy La Beef" Past and present musical projects and associations: Stiff Kitty, Taplash, Zoon Politikon, Alien Masons, Sweet Leaf Garrett, Tim "E" and the Yes Men, Black Donellys, 3 Day Millionaires, Bobnoxious FAMOUS QUOTE "You can do it!!!" |
| OSCAR DE LA HOWARYA: "Porchee" has a strange mental disorder that leads him to believe he was born and raised in Las Vegas. Plays bass, catches bass. Constantly asks "Do these pants make me look fat?". Holds the distinction for actually sleeping overnight in a bar. Has the luckiest glove hand in goaltending. He's a blues legend since 1897. Has the nerve to ask for Scotch in an Irish pub. Alias: "Oscar De La Lager; Broke head, Mr. Tangiers, MASEETO, P.P., Past and present musical projects and associations: 98 D.A., Bassbag, Skirt Rattlers, Buddy, Osterberg, Hot Karl Jr. Green Apple Splash, Northern Strugglers, Tim "E" & The Yes Men, Electric Bananas. (Fill-in for Sweet Leaf Garret, Black Holes) FAMOUS QUOTE "I QUIT" |
| vocals; acoustic gitter, harmonica. lead cowbell |
| drums, smackin' stuff |
| gitter, mandolin, croonin' |
| bass, slappin' and yellin' |
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| T H E B A N D . . . . |
| Special thanks to Shaun Sanders, Tim Hendry, Glen "Archie" Gamble, Jeff "Stan" Fountain, and that Chris Vandemael fella. |
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| 6 string twanger, slide, tremelo |
| DAN "DUTCH" FAWCET: "Dutch" has been known to to play guitar in his sleep. This poor, poor Habs & Lions fan enjoys road trips best when he's close to the ashtray and lighter, Don't let his smile fool you, he is the grumpiest man in rock n' roll (I kid!). Dutch is a Telecaster master, but sometimes, he'll use a Strat *GASP* Hates microphones. Alias: "Dutch, Old Dutch, Bud drinking Dutch, Dan", Past and present musical projects and associations: Mankind, Malachi Brothers, Electric Bananas, Tim "E" & The Yes Men, Chris Hart Band, Moonshine Riders (Fill-in for Sweet Leaf Garret) FAMOUS QUOTE "I'm very proud of ya, that's very nice." |