November 5, 2001
Putting up emails I receive from the company and posting them as
"articles"
is pretty lame, I'll admit that. But this is a goody.
> > Partners:
> >
> > You may have heard that there was a suspicious substance in an
> > envelope that was opened in the DocuSource area. We have checked on
the
> > situation and can report that it was a false alarm.
> > According to the ----- Police Response Unit, who were contacted and
> > removed the envelope for further testing, there is no threat or
danger to
> > us. There was no evidence of anthrax or any hazardous substance in
the
> > envelope. The police suggested that the two or three employees who
touched
> > the envelope should wash their hands and faces with soap and water
as an
> > extra precaution. Otherwise, there is no "clean-up" or
necessary action to
> > take.
> > Please Do Not forward this email outside of the company, and Do Not
> > call others about this incident. Such conduct is counterproductive
and
> > inappropriate. This was a false alarm and it should not interfere
with our
> > normal activities.
> > We are alert and cautious. We will handle this or any threat to our
> > organization in a calm and professional manner. Please contact
either
> > -----or -------if you have any other
questions about this
> > matter.
> >
> > Thank you.
Makes you feel safe doesn't it? Are you all warm and tingly inside
now?
I Knew this letter would touch your heart like it did mine..
Or maybe its Anthrax.
A lady opened up a letter in the mail room. It was from Washington
D.C.
Power sprayed out of the letter, covered her face and arms. She
was
crying like a baby.
Now...in the email they said they were "alert and cautious".
They sure were.
They told her to wash her face.
And then....
They did nothing.
Not until employees began to panic did they think to call the authorities.
They actually had one manager waving the letter around going "See,
there is
nothing wrong! Nothing at all! See? Come touch it!"
Suicidal hot potato.
And when the authorities did show up, no one was allowed to leave.
A thousand potential anthrax victims, typing away and answering phone calls
with their most cheery voice.
Mr. President of the COMPANY couldn't spare us, you see. Couldn't
send us home to safety. What's a little anthrax among co-workers
anyway?
If he had sent us home , think of all the MONEY he would be losing.
He said it, plain as day. He let us all know that we were expendable
to him...
that if we died it really didn't matter, he would find new workers to take
our
place. They have a name for this kind of person I believe.
a Nazi?
Oops...I forgot...I'm not supposed to let anyone see this email....
ha..
Fuck him.