Sometimes                    The Uprise of Paradise                    The Tears of Medusa
For You                    The World Created By Man                    Responsibility

Sometimes

Sometimes I ask why.
Other times I know the answer.
My reflection offers no help.
She just stands there staring as blankly as I am.
Sometimes she makes me so mad.
She is a reminder of a thing
that I want to keep hidden
but I can't hide it from anyone.

Sometimes the tears come.
Other times I force them back.
I laugh to cover the sobs.
I smile and hope
that no one else can see my pain.
Sometimes it is so hard for me
to continue in silence.
My sadness and anger build up
and they want to explode now.

Sometimes I am happy with my friends.
Other times I am alone.
I am left to think about 
things that hurt.
I want to take off my mask.
Sometimes I want to keep it on,
just show my spirit
and cover the lack of beauty
that seems to be heart deep.

Sometimes I tell of my pain.
Other times I bury it
miles deeper than a corpse
in the ground.
It is better for others that way.
But sometimes it eats away at me,
starting from the inside,
leading me to decay and break down.
Some time I won't be able to last.

The Uprise Of Paradise
co written by Jason Hillenburg

In the infinite darkness of your soul.
In the harvest of madness, in the seeds which you sow.
Lie the jackals of uncertainty that claw at the door.
The time has passed when your hope can last, you reek of death like never before.

Blood from loves long past seep into the earth, reaching for hell.
Like starlight in the east, never released, you were the one who fell.
An historic compilation of pain and discovery.
A faded sensation, your lover has left, taking all of their misery.

Caressing compliments from unfaithful friends.
You end up so betrayed, just the means to an end.
And now we bring to a close this disappointment called life
when Eden is surpassed and when the night becomes paradise.

The Tears Of Medusa

Blessed love.
Alive and young and beautiful.
Writhing in godly pleasures 
with the one with whom
I chose to share my
bodily treasures.
Our flesh intertwined
on the cold, solid ground.
No sacrifice lost here
could ever have been greater,
and no holy fires
could every have burned hotter.
No spiteful sprite 
could every have been more cruel
than the Goddess of Love
and her quick childish temper.
Jealous of my perfect love
her magic enveloped me
twisting my muscles,
pulling, pinching,
and raping me of my identity.
Her laughter mixed with my
cries of anguish
in a chorus of such contradictions.
When silence returned
I felt my hair stand on end
and quiver and shake with...
I slid my hand over my face
which now seemed to me
a foreign land
filled with new mountains
and valleys vast.
Straight up
explored my hand further
until a great hissing sounded
and pain exploded
as blood flowed down.
Bitten.
But by what?
Snakes!
Vast quantities
of those horrid creatures.
They were growing from 
my soft scalp.
I turned towards my love,
finally waking from unconsciousness,
to beseech his help.
Our eyes met
and mine burned bright
as his skin greyed
and turned to stone.
My eyes.
It was MY eyes
that caused his transformation.
Oh that damned Goddess! 
To abuse her powers
and curse me 
for my life eternal
with a deadly reminder
of my love of sacrilege
now no more.

For You

For you,
all the world.
I wish to bury you
when you die.
It's the least I could do
for all the insincerity
you put me through.

For you,
all the pain.
I wish to tear out
your uncaring heart
and feed it to the dogs.
Spoil them, control them
and turn them to hogs.

For you,
all the hatred.
I wish to laugh
in your face,
despite all the misery,
and the cruelties
that used to upset me.

For you,
all the joy.
I wish more than ever
to see you lie dead
at my feet, and I pray
that each minute around you
will be the last one I pay.

The World Created By Man
Once in a lifetime of tragedy and 
insanity lies the heart spurned and
cast away by cold winter nights. 
The livelyhood of hopes and dreams
lost forever in the deep abyss.
The echoing moans from departed
loved ones drift throughout the stale air.
The skeletal remains of what was
once called a man are all that remain
in this desolate abode. One single 
raindrop, or teardrop, appears from
the sky, falling down with the
grace of the ocean, long gone.
As it nears the cracked soil it slows
and then hovers, afraid to hit
the ground and die. Even this one
ounce of goodness is destined
to perish in the world created by
man. Yes, there used to be laughter
and smiles everywhere, but the
man-thing got greedy with his
powerful hand and despite all the 
efforts to get the thing banned, he
destroyed all the land, but it
did not go as planned. Look around
at your family, your children, your
friends. Now imagine them gone,
a hard fact to face. But worry not
for in your future you will not be
alone. You, indeed will be dead.
Long gone. This is the way it will
be in the world created by man.

Responsibility

I see your trembling face so filled with fear,
As I remove the dagger from its home.
Afraid to wait and see what is to come.
Your body's stiff with fright so I come near.
I lift the shining blade up high and clear.
I plunge it down so I can hear you moan.
I smell your death with senses finely honed.
I look at you and shed a single tear.
So now you are without a single trace.
I live my life without my piece of mind.
My love for you is still strong as the sea,
A burden I am forver to face
For you, I found, were not the loving kind,
So it was my responsibility.




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