Nihao My Sailor Scout
	or
	Battle at Teenyweenyrininkyo!
	Rescue the Kidnapped Cute Guys!
	written by Jamie Godley

	a fictitious, make-believe,
	what-if kind of a Sailor Moon fanfic
	(this fanfic is rated PG/PG-13)

	Before I begin...
	....Let me get one thing straight.  This idea came to me from out of
the blue, and I knew I just had to get it down.  Basically, as many of you
can tell from the title, this story's gonna be like Ranma 1/2: The Movie 2:
Nihao My Concubine.  WRONG!  This is entirely the same storyline as the mo-
vie, with the exception of the characters, most of the situations, almost
all of the plotline, and the ever-occurring butt jokes that my friends and
I spilled out when we saw the movie.
	Using Sailor Moon characters in place of the Ranma characters was
not that easy.  As it seemed with the movie, apparently all the girls were
paired up with guys, and that was that.  This, of course, brings up that
"Let's pair everyone up and end the series" theory.  Just let me tell you
that it's pretty hard when you've got all these girls to spare, so once
you get into this story, you'll realize that I was pretty desperate in the
match-up.  Actually, four out of five of them are down-right obvious, and
the fifth one, well...I'm sorry!  It was either her or Molly, so take your
pick!  And, as you can also tell by the title, Teenyweenyrininkyo is my
warped version of Togenkyo, Prince Toma's island.  If you'll notice by the
title that the name Rini does appear, don't be frightened.  She's not in
this story.  Instead, I'm bringing back some old favorites, you guessed
it, Queen Beryl and her adoringly annoying lackeys, Jedite, Neflite, Zoy-
site, and Malachite (Are you happy now, Angela?).  She'll obviously be
the villain, and the lackeys will be her, well, lackeys, okay?  In this
case, however, Beryl will be in search of a husband, and is kidnapping
every guy in the Pacific to accomplish just that.  Guess who she chooses.
Well, guess!  C'mon, just one, teeny, weeny little guess?  Aw, fine, be
that way!
	Well, guess I'd better shut-up and get started, so just sit back,
relax, and bask in this joyous fanfic.  Oh yeah, and please, don't drink
and drive.  You can smoke, eat, sleep, whatever, just don't drink, and
I'm sure you'll be alright.

	***

	"Hey, Serena!  You're not gonna believe this!" Molly hollered as
she tugged Serena by the sleeve.  It was the last day of school and Serena
was hurrying home so she could do what she did best, sleep.
	"What is it, Molly?"
	"Some guy's got a huge boat and he's holding a raffle to let coup-
les on it when he sails in the Pacific next week!"
	"Really?  You're kidding, Molly!  Wait, you said couples, didn't
you," Serena started off again, but was pulled back by Molly.
	"Yeah, but hey!  I'm sure Darien would go with you!" Molly poin-
ted out.
	"Hey, you're right!" Serena started to push through the crowd,
but stopped and turned around. "You coming, Moll?"
	"Gee, I'd love to, but my family and I are going to the states
to visit some relatives," Molly replied.
	"Really?  That's too bad.  Whereabouts in America?"
	"Where else?  New York!"
	"Figures," Serena finally made her way through.  It was much to
her surprise to see Mina and Ami signing up as well. "Hey you guys!  Are
y'all signing up too?"
	"Sure am," Mina replied as she signed her name on a ticket.
	"I thought this was for couples."
	"It is, but the rules never mentioned what gender the mate had to
be.  Besides, if I win, I'll just take one of you guys along with me.
See ya 'round," Mina darted off.
	"I'm planning on inviting Greg to go along with me," Ami spoke.
"He's been so busy with his studies lately, and he really needs some time
to relax.  I think this'll be good for the both of us," she dropped her
ticket in the box.  Serena wrote hers and Darien's name down on a ticket
and dropped it in the box as well.  Just as the two were starting to
leave, Serena bumped into someone.  It was Chad.
	"Who are you going to go with, Chad?" Serena asked.
	"Rei, duh.  I mean, even though neither of us have brought it up,
I know she has feelings for me.  This trip will give her a chance to ex-
press them," he gave a goofy smile and placed a ticket in the box.  He
immediately began filling out another one.
	"Boy, won't Rei be surprised if he wins," Ami giggled as the two
walked down the sidewalk.
	"It'll never last," Serena concluded. "They're way too different
for one another."
	"Hey, you know what they say, opposites do attract," Ami replied.
As they both turned the corner, they were dumbfounded at the sight.  It
appeared that Lita was dragging someone out of the arcade, and they were
pleading.  She evidently was ignoring them.
	"C'mon, Lita!  Let me go!  I can't go with you!  What about Rita?
And the arcade?  I can't leave them behind!" Andrew cried as he tried to
release his hand from Lita's grip, but it was no use.
	"But you spend so much time with them!  It's like they're your
life!  Lighten up, Andrew!" Lita replied happily as she dragged him be-
hind her.
	"I like my life just the way it is!  Haven't you ever heard of
freedom of speech?" Andrew whimpered.
	Ami and Serena slowly turned their heads as Lita skipped by them,
waving a fan with the Japanese flag on it in one hand, and hauling Andrew
down the sidewalk in the other.
	"You were saying, Ami?" Serena interrogated.
	"Well, maybe it's not true with everyone!" Ami responded. "I'm
sorry, but I can't stay and chat.  I must be on my way.  Let me know if
Andrew recovers." She wondered off.
	"Sure thing," Serena waved good-bye.

	***

	Greg had a thing about seeing into the future.  He had had this
power since birth, and lately, he had used it to the best of his advan-
tage, ever since he'd met Ami. He gave a big smile as she stood on his
front lawn.  When he saw Ami coming up the walkway, he pretended to be
busy cutting the lawn.  He already knew what she was going to ask.
	"Hi, Greg," Ami greeted kindly. "Are you busy?"
	"Um, no, I'm uh, working on the lawn."
	"Where's your lawnmower?"
	"My lawnmower?" Greg began to laugh. "Um, well, um, you see..."
	"Oh, Greg, you're always good for a laugh.  Um, can I ask you
something?" Ami was beginning to get really nervous.
	"Sure, I'd love to go!  I've always wanted to go on a cruise!"
Greg responded before Ami could even ask the question.
	"Well, then..."
	"I'll meet you at the sign-up place tomorrow morning at 10
o'clock."
	"Huh?"
	"That's when they're picking the winners.  I'm sorry, I must
have gotten ahead of you, Ami," he blushed.
	"Um, okay.  I'll be there," Ami waved good-bye and started off.
Last time I ever try to spring a surprise on him, she thought.

	***

	The next morning, everyone who had signed up the day before
reported back.  Lita had gotten there extra early (early as in 5 am),
and had Andrew hand-cuffed to her.
	"Just promise you'll uncuff me if we don't win," Andrew beckoned.
	"I don't see why I had to come," Rei snorted. "Can't you ever
go anywhere by yourself?  Besides, the chances of you winning this are
slim and none!"
	"I wouldn't say that, Rei," Chad contradicted. "I signed up more
than once."
	"Oh really?  Just how many times more?" she narrowed her eyes.
	"Only 75.  I would've gone for more, but my hand got tired."
	"Hey Serena!  Over here!" Mina motioned for Serena to come join
her. "Did you ever break the news to Darien?"
	"He wasn't home when I called yesterday," Serena said sadly. "But
perhaps he'll show up just for the heck of it." Little did she know that
at that moment Darien was walking down the street, and was surprised to
see a whole crowd of people in front of the Japanese House of Pancakes.
	"I wonder what's going on?" he thought aloud. "Guess I'll stick
around and find out.  I can pick up my tuxedo at the cleaners later on
anyway."
	The crowd hushed as a man stepped on the platform.  In his hands
was the box.  He approached the microphone.
	"Ladies and Gentlemen!  The moment you've all been waiting for!
The first four tickets I pull will win!  Are you ready now?" The crowd
cheered. "I'll take that as a yes.  The first couple is...Chad and Rei!
C'mon down, you lucky couple!"
	"WHAT!?" Rei was shocked. "You tricked me, Chad!  I hate cruis-
es!" She threw a tantrum as Chad pulled her on stage.
	"Lucky them," Serena scoffed.
	"The next lucky couple is..."
	"Please don't let it be me and Lita!" Andrew prayed to himself.
	"...Lita and Andrew!" the announcer boomed.  Andrew felt like crying
as Lita jumped up and down and dragged him on stage.
	"Well, at least I'll be with other people I like," Rei sneered as
Lita and Andrew approached her on stage.
	"Greg, do you think we'll win?" Ami asked.  Of course he knows,
she thought, after all, he can see into the future.  Greg gave her a smile.
	"The next lucky couple is...Ami and Greg!"
	"Alright Ami!" Lita cheered.
	"Well, we've one last chance!" Serena and Mina crossed their
fingers.
	"If I win, you can come with me, Serena," Mina offered.
	"And if I win, I'll...bring you back a souvenir," Serena replied.
Darien saw the two them standing there.
	"Don't tell me Meatballhead signed up," he sighed. "I'd hate to
see the loser who gets stuck with her."
	"And finally, the last couple is..."
	"Come on, hurry," Mina and Serena became excited.
	"...Serena and Darien!  Congratulations!"
	"WHAT!?  SHE DIDN'T!" Darien was more shocked than he had ever
been in his entire life.  Well, guess I'd better join her, he started
to push through the crowd.
	"Where's Darien?" Rei asked as Serena got up on stage.
	"He didn't make-"
	"Serena!  You idiot!  Why?" Darien charged up on stage.
	"Oh, Darien!  You came!" Serena's eyes became two huge hearts.
	"I'm gonna get this all straightened out!" Darien yelled. "Who's
in charge?"
	Mina wasn't that entirely upset.  She slowly made her way out of
the crowd.
	"Oh, poor Mina didn't win.  She'll be left here alone while we're
on the cruise," Ami said sadly.
	"No she won't," Greg said.
	"Congratulations!  You all won against great odds," A voice said
from behind the curtain.  It was the school nerd, Melvin.  He was all
decked out in a Captain's suit, and even had a matching hat on his head.
	"What's with the get-up?  Your mother dress you again?" Serena
joked.
	"No, it just so happens that the eight of you will be joining me
next week when I sail the Pacific!"
	"You mean, when Molly told me that some guy had a huge boat and
was holding a raffle..."
	"That would be I!" Melvin replied proudly.  He looked at his
watch. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to pick up the champagne I
ordered.  We leave the dock on Friday at 7 pm!  See you there!" He
walked off.
	"Wait!  Isn't there some way we can out of this?  What if we
don't want to go?" Darien, Andrew and Rei yelled out in unison.
	"Sorry, when your names were signed onto that ticket, it was
permanent!  You can't back out!"
	"But we didn't sign our names!"
	"Sorry, no refunds."
	"Darien, does this mean you don't want to go with me?" Serena
whimpered.
	"No, it's just that boating's not my thing."
	"You can't let me down!  I thought you liked me!  I can't believe
you!" With that, Serena stormed off stage.
	"Serena, if you'll just listen..." It was no use. "Geez, I can't
help it if I get seasick!"

	***

	Mina leaned against the wall of the place. "Well, I guess it was
just my luck. I mean, it probably wouldn't have mattered anyway.  I
didn't even have someone to go with." Her train of thought was stopped
when someone tapped her on the shoulder.  It was Melvin.
	"Say, aren't you Serena's friend?" He asked.
	"Yeah."
	"I see you didn't win.  I can change that."
	"How?"
	"Well, I do need a first mate," he nudged in the arm.
	"I think I'll pass," Mina replied.
	"Oh, I see.  Just because I'm not as good-looking as those other
guys, you won't go with me," Melvin said.
	"No!  It's not that!" Mina hated being put on guilt trips.  Oh
well, at least I'll be with the others, she thought. "Alright.  I'll go."
She held out her hand.
	"Great!  Oh, it'll be so much fun!" He kissed her hand. "Thank
you, um, um..."
	"Mina," Mina said as she drew back her hand in disgust.
	"Mina!  I love that name!" He started skipping off happily.
	"The things I do to get what I want," she sighed.

	***

	Finally Friday came.  Everyone, except Rei, Darien, and Andrew was
excited.  The group waited with anticipation and stared at the huge
cruiseline before them.  It was huge!  It was as big as, if not bigger
than, the Big Red Boat.  Chad tried to keep his balance as he held Rei's
thirty-some-odd suitcases, containing dozens of dresses, make-up, swim-
suits, etc.
	"Rei, it's only for a week," Ami said. "It's not like forever,"
she pointed to her one simple suitcase. "You should pack lightly."
	"Well, you never know," Rei scoffed. "I mean, what if we get
stranded or something?  It's best to come prepared."
	"Fat chance," Greg replied. "We'll have a safe voyage."
	"Hey you guys!" a voice called out from the top of the pier.
It was Mina.  She ran up to them.
	"Hi, Mina," Ami greeted.  She then lowered her head. "I'm really
sorry you didn't get picked to come.  You'll probably get very lonely
without us around.  Even with Artemis, you won't have much company."
	"Aw, save it, Ami.  I'm coming after all!" She turned around and
showed off her knapsack.
	"But-how did-who-how?"
	"Well, let's just say I stooped really low for this one," Mina
replied.
	"What do you mean?"
	"Mina, report to the poop deck immediately!" a voice blared over
the loudspeakers.  Everyone looked for where it was coming from.  It was
much to their dismay to see the huge boat depart, and behind it was
Melvin's boat, a small boat at that.  Mina slowly made her way to the
boat.  Everyone else followed.  Serena hung back.  Where was Darien?
	"He'd better show up," she said to herself. "Or else I'll-"
	"Alright, I'm here," a gruff voice came from behind.  It was
Darien.  He had a suitcase in one hand, and bag in the other.
	"I'm glad you showed up," Serena said nicely as she guided him
to the boat. "What's in the bag?"
	"Oh, this and that.  Dramamine, motion-sickness pills, Bonine,
patches to go behind my ears..." Darien sifted through his bag.
	"You're not gonna get sick, are you?"
	"Hopefully I won't.  But you never know," Darien responded.
Maybe Serena'll finally get the message and let me go home, he thought.
	"Alright!  Everyone aboard!" Mina hollered through the bull-horn.
	"You're a natural, Mina!" Melvin commented sweetly.  He tried
to put his arm around her, but she smacked him. "Do that again, and
you'll sleep with the fish!"
	"Okay, okay.  Say Melvin, where's the map?"
	"Map Schmap!  I know this ocean like the back of my hand!  Trust me,
everyone, you'll be safe in my capable hands!"
	"We're doomed," Mina muttered as she turned the motor on.

	***

	"Wow, what a great sunset," Serena gazed up at the sky contently.
Only her, Lita, Darien, and of course Melvin and Mina were on deck.
	"Yeah, and get a load of that salty sea air.  Sure is refreshing,"
Lita leaned back against the rail as her hair flapped in the breeze.
	"It sure is, isn't it, Darien.  Darien?" Serena tapped him on
the shoulder to see what was wrong, but her only response was him vomit-
ing over the side.
	"Are you alright, Darien?" Lita asked.
	"Oh, I'm just fine," he remarked in between barfs. "Just a little
seasickness, that's all.  Hmmph-" he went over again.
	"That's awful," Serena sympathized. "Why don't you take your
medicine?"
	"It won't stay down," he gasped.
	"I think I'll go down and see Andrew," Lita got and headed below
deck.
	"Stay back!  I've got a restraining order against you!" Andrew
yelled from below.  Serena didn't follow what happened next, except the
sound of a loud smack! and Andrew screeching in pain.
	"Poor guy," Serena said as she turned around and faced the ocean.
	"Perhaps Lita's trying too hard," a voice came from beside her.
	"Luna!  How long have you been here?" Serena exclaimed as Luna
jumped up beside her.
	"Oh, Artemis and I have been here since this afternoon.  Don't
worry, this boat seems to be made of steel.  The chances of you getting
hit by anything, or sinking for the most part is very minimal," Luna
explained.  Serena let out a sigh of relief.
	"Did you two come along because there's chances the Negaverse
could attack?"
	"No, believe it or not, we guardians do try to have a good time
every now and then," Luna chided.  "Besides, the last time I was on a
boat was when we fought against Jedite that time."
	"Oh yeah, when Rei and Ami went on that cruise and left me
behind," Serena reminisced. "Ah, memories."
	"It wasn't that bad."
	"Too bad Tuxedo Mask didn't show up," Serena teased as she
nudged Darien in the back.
	"Darien, perhaps you should go lay down for a while," Luna
suggested. "You don't look very well."
	"Good idea," Darien slowly got to his feet and staggered below
deck.  Once down there Serena and Luna heard Mina cry out, "Melvin?
I don't have to clean this mess up, do I?"
	"Ohh, it's getting late," Serena yawned and got to her feet.
Luna pounced down and followed behind her. "I think I'll go turn in.
Will you be alright up here by yourself, Melvin?"
	"Sure!  Everything will be a-okay!  Don't worry about a thing!"
Melvin replied as he kept his hand on the wheel.  Serena nodded and head-
ed downstairs.  Just as she was near the bottom, Mina shot by, with radio
in hand, and raced up to the deck.  She appeared to have a worried look
on her face.
	"Melvin?  The radio just said that the winds tonight are gonna
be really strong.  Maybe as fast as forty knots!  We should head back
to shore," Mina warned.
	"Fear not!  The S.S.Nausea will make it, no matter how bad the
weather is!"
	"S.S.Nausea?"
	"Well, when I was coming up with a name for the boat, I couldn't
decide between Nautical Beauty or Sea Queen.  So, I took the first three
letters from those names and came up with Nausea," Melvin explained.
	"Well, at least it's creative," Mina commented. "Just don't tell
Darien or Rei. They're kinda seasick."
	"Oh, land lovers, are they?"
	"Whatever.  Well, just thought you might want to know.  Just
remember, if anything happens, the captain must go down with the ship!"
Mina went back downstairs. "Thank goodness it doesn't say anything
about first mates."

	***

	The radio was right.  Just when everyone was asleep, the weather
started getting rough.  The tiny ship was tossed.  Melvin tried to main-
tain control of the wheel, but it was no use.  The winds started getting
stronger.  The current was gaining control of the boat.  Mina ran up to
see what was the matter, and tried to help Melvin control the boat, but
to no avail.  This ended up in causing the boat to rock like crazy, mean-
ing terrible news for Rei and Darien, who became sick as ever.  The mo-
tion of the boat caused everyone to fly from their bunks, and land on
top of each other.  Artemis had it rough, mainly because everyone lan-
ded on him.  Ami became really worried.
	"What'll we do?  The storm's too strong for the boat!" she
glared at Greg. "I thought you said we were going to have a safe voyage!"
	"Well, we are," Greg responded as he staggered to his feet. "Up
until a certain point that is."
	"Will we make it?" Lita asked urgently.
	"We should, if my mind serves me well."
	"Make it stop..." Rei moaned from a corner of the room. "I can't
take much more of this..." she slumped against the wall.  Serena and Ami
rushed to her side.
	"Will she be alright?" Serena wondered as she held Rei's clammy
hands.
	"She only fainted, that's all," Ami replied. "She'll come to
eventually."
	Back on the deck, things went from bad to worse.  Mina and
Melvin were no match for the high seas.  A giant wave crashed against
the boat.  Mina almost fell off.
	"The only way we'll make it is if this storm gives," she yelled
out.  She glanced at the compass, where the needle was spinning around
like crazy.  She tried to help Melvin lower the sails, but it seemed
impossible.  Another wave crept over the boat.  This one did it.  Mina
was over.  "HELP!"
	Andrew and Lita heard the cry from below and ran up to see what
was happening.  Andrew jumped over when he saw Mina thrashing about.
Within seconds he had her in his grasp and pulled her back up on board.
She was alright.
	"My hero," she murmured.
	"Don't even think about it," Lita said smugly. "He's mine."
	"I suppose we have no choice but to follow the current," Melvin
announced.
	"Let's hope it's not any more dangerous," Mina replied.  Just
then, CRASH!

	***

	"Did we hit land?" Serena asked as she stepped up on deck.  The
winds began to die down.
	"Well, we hit something.  It's too dark to see," Andrew replied.
	"Let's just go down below deck and rest," Mina suggested.
"Wherever we are, we're stuck, okay?  There's no need to worry about
moving." Everyone took this advice and went down below.  They were some-
where, and the earliest they would be able to find out exactly where
was morning.

	***

	Rei felt groggy as she got to her feet.  At first she thought
she was seeing things, but could it be?  Dry land? "No use waiting in
here to find out!" With that, she raced up the stairs to the deck and
proceeded to jump off.  She landed in shallow waters.  Small waves came
up and tickled her feet.  She stepped into the sand.  It was real alright.
	"It's land!  Dry land!  We're safe!  We're safe!" she squealed
with joy as she knelt down and kissed the sand.  Her shrieks of happi-
ness woke everyone else up.
	"What's with that racket?" Serena moaned as she looked out the
window.  She too, became happy about the sight, and proceeded to get
everyone else out of the boat.
	About an hour later, the group met back at the ship.  They had
all broken off into smaller groups to investigate the island.  Luckily,
no restless natives or head-hunters were found, and a small, abandoned
shack was found nearby.
	"Who would've thought a tiny squall would turn into Hurricane
Melvin?" Rei thought as she gazed at the boat.
	"We need to find a way to contact everyone back at home and
tell them what's happened," Ami brought up.
	"Dang, the radio's busted," Mina exclaimed as she shook the
broken radio, their only form of communication. "Guess we can forget
about using Morse Code to contact the land.  Any ideas?"
	"Well, we could always gather big branches to spell out HELP,"
Andrew suggested.
	"What good is that gonna do?" Lita asked.
	"That way, in case any planes fly overhead, they would be able
to see that we're stranded, and in need of help," he explained.
	"Good idea," Darien agreed. "Some of us can go off and look for
branches.  Any volunteers?"
	"I'll go," Greg offered.
	"Me too," Ami said.
	"I'm up to it," Mina proposed.
	"And I'll come along as well," Darien said. "Well, that makes
four of us.  We'll be back soon, okay, guys?" They were off.  Artemis
decided to follow.
	"I wanna go see what's in that shack over there," Rei pointed
over to the hovel.  Serena, Luna and Lita followed.  Andrew watched as
the girls disappeared into the house.  Now's my chance, he thought.
Finally, a chance to get out of Lita's hair.  He raced to catch up
with Darien and the others.
	"Andrew!  What are you doing?" Darien asked.
	"I've decided to come with you guys after all," he replied.
	Meanwhile, back at the shore, Melvin and Chad examined the
boat's damage.
	"This boat cost my family �5,000,000!  It was guaranteed never
to get damaged!  It's ruined!" Melvin cried as he noticed the huge crack
in the boat's side.
	"It's not totally wiped out," Chad said. "It's a good thing I
know how to fix boats like this."
	"You can?"
	"Sure.  It was my summer job the year before I started working
at Rei's temple," Chad said.
	"I thought you were a singer," Melvin retorted.
	"Yeah, well, this was my other job," Chad grabbed a hammer from
the repair kit. "Trust me, I know what I'm doing." He reached for a piece
of plywood and began hammering it over the crack.  Melvin figured he knew
what was to be done, so he decided to wonder around the island for a while.
	At the shack, the girls were having their own share of ordeals.
	"Ick, cobwebs everywhere!" Serena made a disgusted face.  Every-
thing was covered in at least an inch of dust.  Everything metal was
rusted.
	"Man, no food anywhere," Rei complained. "Anyone besides me
really hungry?"
	"Well, now that you mention it," Lita felt her stomach rumble.
"Guess it's up to us to feed everyone else.  Let's gather some coconuts
or something." She headed outside.
	"Coconuts?  Yucky," Serena wrinkled her nose.
	"Face it, Serena, I don't like this anymore than you do, but now
that we're stuck on a desert island, it's not like we can walk up to
McDonald's and get a Big Mac!" Rei responded.
	"We could always catch fish," Luna suggested as she licked her
lips.
	"That's not a bad idea," Lita replied.  She knelt down and picked
up a stick.  She then pulled out a piece of her hair and tied it to the
stick.  Rei and Serena watched in wonder.  Lita walked over to the water
and dipped her hand in it.  She pulled out a tiny piece of plankton and
attached it to the other end of her hair.  "Behold, a homemade fishing
rod." She placed it into the water.
	"It'll never work," Serena scoffed as she watched.
	"Wait!  I've got a bite!" Lita felt a tug on her pole.
	"Already?"
	Lita yanked her stick out of the water.  Sure enough, on the
end of it was a medium sized trout.  She turned to see Serena's, Rei's,
and Luna's eyes bugged out.  The girls then decided to do the same.
In the hour that followed, the three of them had caught 20 fish alto-
gether; Lita caught 19, Rei caught 1, and Serena caught zero.

	***

	"These sticks should be just what we need," Darien said proudly
as he tied the pack of sticks with a vine. "Let's head on back." Everyone
nodded.
	Ami thought Greg was walking next to her, but when she turned
to him, he wasn't there.  Luckily he was a few feet behind.  He had a
somber look on his face.
	"Greg, what's the matter?"
	"Ami, it's kinda hard to explain.  I'm getting these visions
that something bad is going to happen to us later on," he lowered his
head.
	"What?"
	"We should be extra careful," he warned. "although I could be
wrong."
	"Oh Greg, nothing's going to happen to us," Ami reassured. "You're
not sure about these visions, are you?"
	"Well, they are subject to change," Greg replied. "but I wouldn't
count on it."
	Ami turned around and continued walking.  She then remembered
that Greg did have the power to see into the future, and his visions were
rarely wrong.  Of course, he was the one who said they were going to have
a safe voyage, and that was wrong, of course.  Maybe he's still shaken
up from the crash last night, she thought.  Or maybe it's paranoia.
She turned back around to see him, only this time he wasn't there.
	"Greg?" she cried out. "Greg?  Where are you?  He's vanished,"
she looked everywhere, but there was no trace of him anywhere.  As she
started to retrace their steps, something blocked her path.  It looked
like a small, dark fruit. "A prune?  What's a prune be doing out in
these parts?  Hmm, something strange is going on here," she picked it
up off the ground and ran to catch up with the others.

	***

	"Lunchtime!" Lita announced loudly as she banged a make-shift
triangle.  The three of them had changed into their swimsuits during the
time that had passed.  Lita was proudly decked out in her green bikini
top and matching surf-shorts.  Serena was content in her pink bathing
suit with big yellow bows on it.  Rei hadn't come out yet.
	"What's taking Rei so long?" Serena said impatiently as she
helped Lita cook the fish over the fire.
	"Well, whaddya think?" Rei announced as she appeared in the
doorway.  She was clad in a fire-engine red skirted bikini, similar to
Lum's outfit, nix the boots.
	"I think it'll get the guy's attention," Lita laughed as she
plopped a fish on a plate.
	"Rei, are you trying to go for concubine of the year?" Serena
insulted.
	"Gee, I didn't know your brain was big enough for such big
words!" Rei shot back.
	"Say, isn't concubine another word for whore?" Lita pointed
out.
	"Oh, a whore am I?" Rei prepared to slug Serena.
	"Yeah, that's exactly what I mea-"
	The two were interrupted by the sound of shouting from down
the beach.  It was Ami.  The other four followed close behind.
	"What happened?" Luna asked. "Where's Greg?"
	"We don't know what happened to him," Ami panted. "I was talking
to him one minute, and the next minute he was gone without a trace!"
	"We've got no idea what happened to him," Darien continued. "I
thought this island was safe."
	"What's that in your hands, Ami?" Rei wondered.
	"It's a prune.  I only noticed it as soon as Greg disappeared,"
Ami said.
	"Wow!  That'll make a great appetizer!" Lita tried to take it
from her, bit Ami snatched it from her grasp.
	"You think some evil monster came up and turned Greg into a
prune?" Serena wondered aloud.
	"Oh, get real, Serena, there's no such things as monsters!"
Rei replied harshly.
	"Odd coming from a Sailor Scout who fights them on a daily
basis," Mina responded.
	"Well, perhaps Serena is right for a change," Artemis suggest-
ed.
	"You know, lately I've heard of a lot of people disappearing
out here in the Pacific," Andrew said.
	"Me too, and the ironic part was that they were all male," Lita
finished.  Darien, Andrew, and Artemis shuddered.
	"So what you're trying to say is that someone is kidnapping all
these guys?" Ami asked.
	"In a nutshell, yeah," Lita answered.
	"And that means...we gotta go find Chad and Melvin before it's
too late!" Mina realized.  She darted off, Rei and Artemis following
close behind.

	***

	"This should do it," Chad said as he readied the final nail.
As he reached for his hammer, he realized that it was out of grasp.
"Melvin?  Can you give me the hammer?  Melvin?" He scratched his head.
"Where'd that little booger go?" Something unusual appeared in the
corner of his eye.  He turned around to see...a prune.
	"What the heck is this?" Chad got up and stretched.  He picked
up the prune and sniffed it.  Smelled like something edible, considering
the last time Chad had eaten was the day before and here it was sunset
of the next day.  As he prepared to eat it, something unknown came up
behind him and prevented him to do this.  His only response was a terr-
ified yell, then nothing.  A second prune plopped up in his place.
	The three had heard the scream and ran faster than ever, but it
was too late.
	"Two more prunes!" Artemis skidded towards them.
	"That must mean that this kidnapper got them too," Mina examined
the area for evidence, but found nothing, except for Chad's hammer.
	"CHAD!" Rei shrieked. "WHY DID THEY HAVE TO TAKE HIM?  WHY?
WHY?  WHY!"
	"Rei, chill out," Mina tried to calm her down. "We'll find
them."
	"IT'S NOT FAIR!  WHY DID THEY HAVE TO TAKE HIM, AND LEAVE THIS,
THIS PRUNE IN HIS PLACE?" She bounced one around in her hand. "I mean,
why not leave an apple in his place, or a banana?  Prunes are so...nasty,"
Rei dropped it on the ground.
	"Rei!  That could've been Chad that you dropped!" Mina picked
up the two pruned and brushed them off. "Now there's a bruise!"
	"Look on the bright side, Mina," Rei pointed out. "It could've
been Melvin.  You should be happy now, he's gone forever."
	"You're heartless, you know that, Rei?" Mina carried the two
prunes in her hand and stormed back to the shelter.  Artemis tagged
along.
	"H-hey, it was just a joke!  Can't you take a joke?" Rei tried
to catch up with them.

	***

	"Someone's coming!" Serena announced as she stood up from the
group.  It was dark now, and the bonfire was their only source for light,
and heat at that.  The someones were Mina, Rei, and Artemis.
	"You guys were too late, weren't you?" Ami said solemnly as she
gazed at the two prunes in Mina's hands.
	"Yep, these were the only things we found by the boat," Artemis
replied.
	Rei looked at the group suspiciously.  There were only three
people there, and Luna of course, besides them, Serena, Darien, and Ami.
Lita and Andrew were gone. "Oh great, who was stupid enough to let them
out of your sight?" she narrowed her eyes at Serena in particular.
	"It seemed like a logical reason at the time," Darien began.
"About an hour ago, after you guys left, Andrew said he had to go.  You
know, go.  So we told him to be careful, and he said he would.  Well, a
half-hour passed.  We figured this was time enough to do the business,
unless he was constipated, you know?  So Lita piped up and said she
would go look for him.  She hasn't returned yet.  Chances are he's a
prune now," he sighed. "Of course, if this kidnapper was desperate
enough to get Melvin, then they probably said to heck with it and
took Lita as well."
	"Darien!  Don't say that!" Luna yelled at him.
	At that moment, they all turned their heads towards a rustling
in the palm trees.  It was Lita.  She looked as though she had been
jumped by someone.  Her hair was terribly mussed, and there were scrapes
all over her face.  A prune was in her hand.
	"Three guesses as to what happened to Andrew!" she panted and
wiped the sweat off her forehead.
	"I think that's kinda obvious.  The question is, what happened
to you?" Darien helped her sit down on a log.
	"I saw him right before he disappeared.  I tried to distract him,
tried to get him to come over to me, and then, and then..."
	"AND THEN WHAT?" everyone pressured.
	"And then I saw it.  It was a huge black aura of some sort, and
it engulfed him just like that!" she snapped her fingers. "I ran like
heck over to the aura and tried to destroy it, but it repelled me
against a tree.  I didn't see what happened next.  When I finally got
to my feet, the only thing that remained in the spot where it all took
place was this prune, and a big puddl-"
	"There'll be enough of that, Lita," Luna interrupted. "So you
say it was a big black aura?"
	"Yeah, it kinda resembled a human.  A fat human, but a human
at that," Lita concluded.  Tears swelled up in her eyes. "He looked
like my old boyfriend!" she put her head in Darien's lap and sobbed.
He patted her on the head.
	"There, there," he murmured. "I'm sure you'll find another guy
that looks just like your old boyfriend somewhere else."
	"This is getting awfully serious," Artemis said. "We gotta find
out who's behind this and get back those guys!  Luckily I have a plan.
And there are three of us who are definite candidates for the next
abduction!  I, of course, am a cat, so that eliminates me.  I take it
we all know who the other two are."
	"Well, I know I'm one of them," Darien slowly got to his feet,
ignoring the fact that Lita was still in his lap.  She fell over in
the sand.
	"Yes, you're one," Artemis nodded his head. "You and one other."
He glared straight ahead.  Luna followed what he was getting at, and one
by one, so did the other girls.  Everyone that is, except Serena.
	"Why is everyone staring at me?" Serena had an uneasy feeling
in her stomach.
	"Serena," Luna glanced at her knapsack. "Get out the Luna Pen."
	"Why?" She got it out, just as she was told.
	"Hold it up..."
	"Wait a minute!  There's no way I'm doing that."
	"But you have to!"
	"Okay, okay.  DISGUISE POWER!  CHANGE ME INTO A...UM, uh, what
am I turning myself into?"
	"Oh, Serena, why must you be so ignorant?  You're changing your-
self into a male, therefore we can lure that kidnapper into a trap!"
	"Um, okay.  DISGUISE POWER!  CHANGE ME INTO A REALLY CUTE GUY!"
In a flash of light, the hair changed.  The clothes changed.  The gender
changed.
	"Gee, and thought I'd seen everything," Rei said, "I mean, I've
seen her as a celebrity, as a kindergarten teacher, even as a fortune
teller!  But I never thought I'd see the day when that Luna Pen could
be a gender bender as well," she crossed her hands over her chest.
	"Well, how do I look?" Serena asked when she was complete.  She
now appeared as a tall, somewhat muscular, blond guy, clad in shorts
and a tank top.
	"It's...perfect," Ami gasped. "Almost real."
	"Whaddya mean, almost real?  What am I missing?"
	"Guess," Mina said, "But we're not gonna tell you if you're right
or not."
	"The Luna Pen may be a powerful transforming device, but it
can't work miracles," Luna replied.
	"Now, we need a way to lure the kidnapper into a trap," Artemis
thought. "Lita, get some rope."

	***

	"This is torture!  Lemme go!  Lemme go!  Lemme go!  I hate you
 all!" Serena thrashed around, trying to get loose.  The others had tied
her to a tree near the shoreline.  Now remember, Serena is still in a
guy form, and is now a sitting target for the kidnapper.  Lita and
Darien, the two strongest out of the group, waited behind a nearby bush
to attack the kidnapper.  The others head behind various trees and rocks
surrounding the area.
	"Serena, shut-up, or this'll never work!" Rei shouted from afar.
	"Remember to say Disguise Power Reverse when the aura hits you,"
Luna warned.
	Just then it happened.  Everyone's eyes focused on the black aura
as it slithered from the water and across the sand, headed towards Serena.
Just as it was about to engulf her...
	"DISGUISE POWER REVERSE!" Serena yelled, and in a flash of light
she was back to normal.  The aura shot back, surprised.  Rei sprang into
action.
	"I call upon the power of Mars!  Vanquish this evil!" With that,
she slapped a parchment paper on the aura, and paralyzed it on the spot.
	"NOW!!!" Artemis yelled, and everyone jumped the aura.  Just when
they all thought they had kicked the daylights out of it, the aura explo-
ded and repelled everyone backwards.
	"What's happening!?" Ami cried out as she popped her head out
of the bushes.
	"How dare you adolescent freaks jump me!" a voice yelled from
the aura.  It took the form of a human.  The aura diminished.  The fig-
ure appeared to be a woman, with frizzy red hair, and a skin-tight pur-
ple gown.  She had an upside-down boomerang thing on her forehead, and
had elfin ears like nobody's business.
	"W-who are you?" Serena got to her feet and approached her.
	"Names aren't important right now," the woman replied.
	"You're the one who's been taking all the guys from nearby!"
Lita jabbed her finger at the woman.
	"Why?" Mina wondered.
	"I'm in search of a husband.  Eventually one of the many men I
have kidnapped will be my one and only," the woman said.
	"Geez, isn't capturing them torture enough?" Rei crossed her
arms over her chest as she made a disgusted face at the hideous woman.
	The woman prepared to make a rude comeback to Rei, but then she
saw Darien emerge from behind a palm tree.  Her were glued to him like
an insect on a flypaper.  Then she managed to narrow her eyes at him.
In an instant another aura shot out from under her feet, and plopped
under his.  Considering this to be a slowly dramatic moment, Darien fell
slowly into the aura.  Everyone turned their heads in slow motion to hear
his cries for help.  Lita grabbed hold of is hand, and practically pro-
ceeded to fall in after him.  The other scouts tried to help, but as soon
as Darien was completely in the aura disappeared, and they all collapsed
on top of each other.
	"Finally!  The perfect groom for me!" the woman cackled and pre-
pared to depart.
	"You give him back!" Serena made a fist and wrung it in the
air.
	"You'll have to get him yourself!" the woman replied harshly.
	"Where did you take him?" Rei asked angrily.
	"Where else?  But to my floating island, Teenyweenyrininkyo!"
	"Floating...island?" Ami found this hard to believe.
	"Teenyweeny-what?" Artemis said. "Ribinky-Riniki-Reeky..."
	"TEENYWEENYRININKYO!!" the woman boomed. "It is indeed an island
unlike any other.  You see, it has the ability to sail across the waters
like a sailboat.  The chances of you girls catching up with it are slim
and none."
	"How's that?" Mina asked.
	"You could set off this instant in search of it, but at the same
time my island could be moving at a speed twice your own.  You could hit
Hawaii after a week, and my island would be halfway around the globe!
Beat that!  However, if you were to catch up with my island, I might con-
sider giving them back to you," the woman sneered. "But...no one's ever
made it, or even escaped from my island." she disappeared.
	"It's like this island has a motor or somethin' attached to it,"
Lita began.
	The woman reappeared. "No, there's no motor on it!  It's wind-
powered, and moves along with the current." She disappeared again.
	"This means...it could take forever to reach Teenyweeny-whatever-
it's called," Rei exclaimed.
	"Not hardly," Ami replied.  She licked the tip of her index fin-
ger and shot it up in the sky.
	"Don't even think of giving me a wet-willy," Serena stepped back
and held her ears.
	"That's not what I'm doing, Serena," Ami said. "I knew it."
	"Knew what?" Lita questioned.
	"That woman wasn't very bright.  If her island follows the wind
patterns, then by morning it'll be in spitting distance.  The winds are
moving west-southwest now at 15 knots, but that's likely to increase
overnight.  She should hit nearby at dawn!"  Ami brought her hand down.
	"That's amazing!" Serena exclaimed. "You figured all that out
from a spit-covered finger?"  Ami rolled her eyes.
	"I suppose we'll have to follow Ami's hypothesis," Artemis said.
	"What shall we do till then?" Luna wondered.
	"I guess we should all get some shut-eye.  We'll need all the
strength we can get when we face that island tomorrow," Mina stretched
and yawned.  Everyone took this idea into consideration and headed
towards the shack.

	***

	Morning came incredibly fast.  To Serena, just as she was clo-
sing her eyes, the sun was coming up.  Within the moments that followed
she felt a pounce behind her and then she was face to face with Luna.
She shrieked.
	"Luna!  Don't do that so early in the morning!" Serena dug her
face into the sleeping bag.  Luna began to tug on her hair.
	"Serena, you have to get up right away!  We've waited long
enough for you!" Luna shouted in her ear.
	Serena suddenly remembered what happened the night before and
like a bolt of lightning she was ready to go. "We've got to go find
Darien!"
	"Not to mention the other guys," Luna added.
	"It's about time," Rei scorned as she Serena raced outside, Luna
at her heels.
	"There it is," Ami pointed to a huge atoll about a half-mile down
the beach.  It looked like a mountain, and was covered in trees.  There
was what appeared to be a dark fortress at the top.
	"Guess it's us against that fortress, eh scouts?" Rei pretended to
make a fist.  Everyone nodded. "Let's be off!"

	***

	"Whew, we made it," Lita wiped the sweat off her forehead and stood
up.  It was a long climb from the island's base to it's flat surface.  A
dirt path lay before them, with neat rows of palm trees on either side.
A huge door was seen in the distance.
	"We can't just barge in," Artemis began. "Who knows what we'll
find?"
	"We could always have Serena transform back into a guy," Lita
suggested.
	"No, not again," Serena put her head in her hands.
	"What's the matter, Serena?  Scared to go?" Rei teased.
	"Of course not!  DISGUISE POWER!  CHANGE ME INTO A EVEN CUTER
GUY!!!" Just like before, a flash of light caused her to change.
	"She looks my old boyfriend," Lita murmured dreamily.  Mina
nudged her in the side.
	"Well, I suppose if the last disguise tricked that woman, this
one should work as well," Ami said. "What have we got to lose?"
	"My dignity, that's one thing," Serena muttered.
	"Oh, Serena, you sound like a girl!" Rei jeered.
	"That's because I am a girl," Serena shot back.
	"Not now you're not," with that, Rei pushed Serena out into the
middle of the path, where two of the door guards noticed her.
	"Looks like an escapee," one of the guards said. "Should we take
him back?"
	"Guess so, if Beryl finds out we let one escape," the other ran
a finger across her neck. "Hey you!  Get back here!"
	"Huh?" Serena failed to acknowledge what was going on, and the
girls watched as the guards grabbed her at full force, and drug her back
to the fortress.  Serena managed a weak smile and a thumbs-up for `So far,
so good.'
	"As long as Serena distracts them for a while," Ami said. "It
should buy us some time to search for the guys."
	"Maybe we shouldn't split up just yet," Mina decided. "That place
looks like a maze." Everyone followed her eyes as she slowly studied the
structure. "There!  That window there looks like a good place to go into."
	"But Mina, it's on the fourth floor!" Rei complained. "Haven't we
climbed enough for one day?"
	"Do you wanna see the guys again?"
	"Well, I could live without Chad," Rei shrugged.
	"I think I can see what Mina's getting at," Ami said as she typed
in her mini-computer. "Did you know that there's a ladder going directly
to that window in particular?  And the fact that there's no guards around
makes it a safe bet."
	"Yeah, but who know's who's on the inside," Artemis said ner-
vously.
	"We won't know till we find out, now will we?" Lita sprang from
the bushes.
	"But what about the guards?" Mina asked cautiously.
	"They're not back yet.  We still have some time," Rei looked
around.
	"Let's hurry before they get return!" Artemis announced.  The six
ran like heck to the ladder and began climbing it.

	***

	"And don't try escaping again!" the guards yelled as they tossed
Serena into a large, dim room.  The door was situated about three feet
from the floor, and this, of course, caused Serena to fall flat on her,
or in this case his, face.
	"Where am I?" Serena thought to, um...herself (no use in confusing
myself in my own story, is there?).  She got to her feet.  A bit of sunlight
seeped into skinny windows about ten feet up against the wall.  Serena
soon realized that she wasn't in there alone. "Have I hit the jack-pot
or what?" There were at least a hundred other guys in there with her.
She began to wonder through the crowds, looking for familiar faces.
Just as she saw Darien emerge through the masses, the door opened again.
It was a man, a very familiar-looking man.  A very, very, familiar-looking
man.
	"Who are you?" Some of the guys asked.
	"My name," he began. "is Maxfield Stanton.  You should be happy
to know there is a way out of here, but it's not easy.  I was once held
captive here myself, but now I work alongside the very Queen of this place."
	"So, what's the plan?"
	"In a few minutes, you will be released into a dressing room,
where you can feel free to go hog wild, and have the all the fun you wish.
Pick any ensemble to wear, and then report to the throne room, for some,
ahem, festivities," he explained.
	"Hey, you putz, we're not a bunch of pre-teenage girls!  We don't
go berserk over clothes, you know!" a guy yelled from across the room.
	"While that may still be the case, it's also your possible ticket
out of here.  If you refuse to participate in the activities planned later
on, then we shall assume that you wish to be tortured by the worst degree
known to mankind," Maxfield said as he ran his fingers through his hair.
	"Yeah, and what may that be?" another voice cried out.
	Maxfield reached from behind and pulled out a huge portrait of
someone.  The instant the guys saw it caused them to go mad.  It was a
picture of a girl, with two poofy pink ponytails, and bewitching red eyes.
Serena screamed.  Some of the guys stared at her strangely.
	"Hey, that guy screamed like a girl," the whispered to one another.
Serena blushed nervously.
	"I take it then that you are all planning on showing up later on?"
Maxfield reassured.  His response was a unanimous yes.  "Very well."  He
closed the door and left.
	Serena knew she had no choice now but to stay as a male.  Now
that Maxfield was gone she had the freedom to look for the guys.  She
instantly found Darien, and grabbed him by the arm.
	"Do I know you?" Darien asked as he jerked back his arm.
	"It's me, Serena," Serena replied, just realizing that she was
still a guy.
	"You're in disguise again?"
	"Yeah, I'm gonna try to bust you guys out later on."
	"Are you staying for the festivities?"
	"Unless the others give me the signal beforehand.  Until then,
I'm all male."
	"Well, Serena, might I suggest that you don't hang all over me
then?  Some of the other guys'll get the wrong idea about us," Darien
responded.  He then began to snicker.
	"What's so funny?"
	"It's nothing, really.  It's just..." he cleared his throat.
"I never thought I'd see you stoop so low just to be with me."
	"Hey, it's not just for you, Darien!" Serena began to pout.
	"So, where are the others?" Darien asked.
	"Wish I knew," Serena stared out the window.

	***

	At last they had reached the window they were going to break
into.  Lita peaked inside.
	"You see anything?" Mina asked from a lower rung on the ladder.
	"No, it's all dark."
	"Should we bust in?" Rei inquired.
	"I don't see why not," Artemis answered as he clung to Mina's
shoulders.
	"Okay, follow my lead.  On the count of three we break in,
okay?"
	"Okay!"
	"One...two...THREE!!" They all leaped in at the same time.
	Just then the light switched on.  There were three other people
in there.  One had short blond hair, another had long blond hair tied in
the back, and the third one had long white hair.
	"What do you think you're doing here?" the white-haired one asked
angrily.
	"New strategy!  Run like hell!" With that, the four girls and two
cats tore through the room, and out the door, Lita leading the way.  Once
outside the room, they were faced with the decision of which way to go in
the hallway.
	"There's no time to decide!" Ami said urgently. "We should just
head one way and hope for the best!"
	"Works for me!" the others replied, and they ran down the hall,
coincidentally leading to the throne room.
	"Should we follow them, Malachite?" the person with the long-
ponytail asked.
	"Why not, Zoysite.  I'm bored anyway," Malachite drew back his
cape, and proceeded down the hall, at a subtle pace.
	"Can't we go any faster?" the other guy asked impatiently.
	"What for, Jedite?  This fortress is a maze.  Remember that boy
with the yellow bandanna that winded up here a couple weeks ago?  I bet
he's still here," Malachite said. "In fact, I think I saw him about two
days ago.  Said he was still looking for some freak place called Tokyo
or something."
	"Tourists," Zoysite and Jedite groaned in unison.

	***

	"Will everyone please assemble into the throne room at this time?"
Maxfield announced over the loudspeaker.  Within the moments that follow-
ed, all of the guys filed into the large room, and some gathered in small
groups and began socializing until the festivities began.
	"I wish they would hurry up and get here," Serena grunted as
she wondered around the room.  It was a magnificent throne room.  There
were huge pillars adorned with flowering vines, and a beautiful fountain
in the center.  Serena hadn't planned on being a guy this long, and was
beginning to not enjoy it.  She couldn't see any guys she recognized,
until...
	"Yoohoo, look at me!" a familiar voice called out.  Serena jerked
her head to see what it was.  At first she couldn't see anything, mainly
because a bunch of harem girls were swarming around him.  Then she found
out.  It was Melvin.  He was wearing absolutely nothing, except for a
small leopard-skin loincloth.  Serena felt like she was going to hurl,
and looked away in disgust.  She then stormed up to him.
	"What do you think you're doing?" She asked, neglecting once
again that she was a guy.
	"What's it to you?" Melvin snapped. "In case you haven't figured
it out, I'm planning on marrying the lady in charge of these shenanigans!
I admit there is an age difference, but hey!  No one'll know!  Come hither,
my ladies!" He motioned as the girls giggled and formed around him.
	Once everyone was inside, Maxfield strolled in and slammed the
door.  Everybody hushed immediately.  Maxfield walked up some stairs to
a balcony overlooking the room.  He stepped up to the microphone and cl-
eared his throat.
	"I'm glad to see you could all make it," he began.
	"Well, it's not like we had a choice!" a voice yelled out.
	"You have all been selected to take part in the one and only
bridal games!" he announced.
	"WHAT!?" Everyone cried out in astonishment.
	"There will be a competition, in which the Queen will decide who
will be the winner," he explained. "The person who wins the competition
will be her husband!"
	"What the-I can't do this!" Serena exclaimed to herself. "What
will the others think?  Wait a minute!  I can do this!  After all, I'm
still a guy!  If I were to win all the competition, I could then defeat
the Queen and rescue all the guys at the same time!  Boy, that would
really show Rei!  Would her face be red!" She chuckled to herself.
	"And now, it is with great pleasure that I announce the judge,
the bride-to-be, the lovely, the beautiful...QUEEN BERYL!" Subsequently
Maxfield was the only person clapping.  Beryl, who was indeed the woman
who had kidnapped all the guys, pranced across the balcony and sat down
her throne seat, overlooking the crowd of shocked guys.
	"Then again, I suppose these guys are strong enough to take care
of themselves!" Serena said to herself in anguish.
	"I think I'll take my chances with the pink-haired moppet!" a
sarcastic voice hollered over the crowd.
	"Neflite," Beryl said rigidly. "Eliminate him."
	BOOM!  The guy was no more.  All that remained was a pile of
ashes and a pair of sunglasses.
	"Let that be a warning to all of you!" Maxfield bellowed as the
guys gulped with fear. "The Queen wants a husband who is sporty and good
with his hands, so...for our first competition, you will each receive a
frisbee.  Whoever can make it into the bulls-eye wins!  On your mark, get
set, GO!"
	All of a sudden frisbees went flying everywhere.  Serena simply
stood there for a moment, trying to comprehend what exactly was going
on.
	"This one's going to be way too easy," she thought to herself.
She could throw her Moon Tiara like a natural, and throwing a frisbee
wasn't that much different.  Darien looked over at her, or still in this
case him, and watched as she got into position to throw it.
	"I'd better duck," he moaned. "Knowing Serena, she could put
someone's eye out with that thing!"
	"Ready, set, HAH!" With that, Serena tossed the frisbee towards
the bulls-eye at lightning speed.  Sure enough, it tore right through
the board.  The other guys watched her in utter shock.
	"Woah, he just ripped a hole clean through the bulls-eye!" some
of them murmured.  Darien's jaw dropped.  Maybe Serena wasn't a total
clutz after all, he thought.
	"I won!" Serena jumped up and down with glee.  She raced up to
the balcony. "Alright, I won that one.  Now what?"
	"Boring," Beryl sighed.
	"It seems that that competition didn't please the Queen," Maxfield
said. "She has chosen to have another one."
	"What!?  But I won that one fair and square!" Serena complain-
ed.
	"Look, mister, it's not my choice if the Queen is satisfied or
not," Maxfield said.  "Go back down there, or else you'll be eliminated."
Serena zipped back down. "For the next contest, a husband must have
skill and patience, so the object of this one is to move one grain of
rice from one platter to another.  Whoever completes this one first
will win.  Ready, set, GO!"
	Serena stared at the full platter of rice and the empty one
next to it.  There was no way she could do this one!  Unless...
	"LOOK!  ISN'T THAT TATEWAKI KUNO, AGE 17 OVER THERE?" She
jabbed her finger in a random direction.  Everyone's heads jerked over
in that direction, while Serena dumped the pile of rice onto the next
platter.
	"Hey, I don't see anyone," some of the guys replied pitifully.
	"Whee!  I won again!" Serena smiled as she showed off her full
platter of rice. She ran up the stairs again to the balcony, being careful
not to spill any rice. "Alright, that's two down, Queen!" She said angrily.
"I won them fair and square."
	Beryl sighed and rolled her eyes. "That one didn't suit me either.
Can't we do anything fun?"
	"Hmm, let's see," Maxfield thought for a moment.  Just as he was
about to answer-
	"My Queen, we have some bad news," Malachite declared as he,
Zoysite, and Jedite entered the room.  He shut the doors behind him. "It
appears that there are some female intruders in the fortress."
	"Really?  Where are they now?" Beryl asked in concern.
	Darien had finally completed the contest.  He then realized, was
this really necessary?  Of course not, he contemplated. "I bet that Queen
won't marry any of us.  She just wants to use us for entertainment!  I'm
gonna put a stop to this." He stormed up the stairs.
	"Send the other guards out after them," Beryl instructed. "And
bring them to me-"
	"Alright, I've had enough of this!  You can't use us for enter-
tainment!" Darien shook his fists in Beryl's face angrily.  Beryl stared
at him with inquiring eyes.
	"You're perfect," she breathed. "Just the husband I need."
	"That's not fair!" Serena complained. "He didn't win any of the
contests!"
	"That doesn't matter!" Beryl snapped.  She grabbed Darien by
the wrist. "You're coming with me!"
  	Suddenly, a window shattered from across the room.  It was Lita,
Mina, Rei, Ami, Luna, and Artemis.
	"Alright, we made it!" Rei cheered as they jumped down on the
floor.
	"Rei, you came to rescue me from these horrible fiends!" Chad
cried out from across the room.
	"Oh great," Rei sighed.
	"Give up the guys now, or prepare to pay the consequences!"
Lita threatened.
	"You again!?" Malachite shouted as he, Zoysite, Jedite, and
the other guards surrounded them. "I don't think the odds are in your
favor now."
	"They're outnumbering us 4 to 1!" Ami shrieked as they all got
into fighting stances.
	"How did you know all that?" Mina asked.
	"Wild guess." The girls backed each other and formed a circle
as the guards formed a larger circle around them.  Lita started things
off.
	"LET'S RUMBLE-"
	"-MEET YOUR DOOM-" Rei added.
	"-ARE YOU READY-" Mina added.
	"-LET'S OBLITERATE THE REPREHENSIBLE ADVERSARIES!" Ami completed.
	"Huh?  Ami!" The others shouted back at her.  The fighting began.
	"Queen Beryl!  What about the other guys down there?" Maxfield
asked.
	"I don't care.  Have at it," Beryl replied nonchalantly and
disappeared.
	"Oh, this is indeed a blessed day," Maxfield felt like crying
he was so happy.  "Listen up, guards!" Everyone hushed suddenly. "GO
FOR IT!!!"
	With that, the guards, some male, and some female, and some
undetermined by science, grabbed guys from left and right, and tore
out of the throne room.  Jedite grabbed Melvin, Malachite got Andrew,
Zoysite got Chad, and Neflite (Maxfield Stanton) apprehended Greg.  A
moment later a huge monstrous cat came up and took Artemis.
	The room became immediately deserted, except for the five
scouts.
	"Why didn't any of them take me?" Serena whimpered from the
balcony.
	"Gee, I guess even as a guy you can't score!" Rei teased from
below.
	"Enough already!  It's time to transform and rescue those guys!"
Luna commanded.
	"Okay!  MOON PRISM POWER!" Serena yelled.
	"MERCURY POWER!" Ami shouted.
	"MARS POWER!" Rei hollered.
	"JUPITER POWER!" Lita blared.
	"VENUS POWER!" Mina clamored.
	"Alright, let's split up and get back our guys!" Serena instruc-
ted.  The other Sailor Scouts nodded and they all took off on their own
way.

	***

	"Let me go!" Andrew cried out in agony.  Malachite had merely
tied him to a chair.
	"Enough!  You're mine now!" Malachite chided.
	"Your's!?  But you're a male!" Andrew shrieked. "You're trying
to come on to me!"
	"Merely a matter of coincidence we're both males.  Hasn't stop-
ped me before," Malachite responded.
	"I should've taken my chances with Lita," Andrew muttered piti-
fully.  Just when he feared all hope was lost...
	"LET HIM GO RIGHT NOW!" a voice yelled from the doorway.  It was
none other than Lita, a.k.a. Sailor Jupiter.
	"Who's there?" Malachite sneered.
	"I'm warning ya, release him now," Lita threatened.
	"And what if I don't?  Are you going to do something about it?"
	"Sure am!  JUPITER THUNDER...CRASH!" With that, she sent a volt
of lightning towards Malachite, but he managed to suck up the energy
and repel it back at her with more force.  She knocked clean through
the wall.  Andrew gasped.
	"Measly upstart," Malachite muttered angrily.  He turned back
to a shocked Andrew. "Now then, where were we?"
	"I'm...not gonna let you get away with this...so easily," a weak
voice quivered from the hole in the wall.  Lita tried to stagger to her
feet and keep her balance.
	"You again?  When have you had enough?" Malachite prepared to send
another blast at her.
	"I'm not finished yet...but you are," Lita got into a weak fight-
ing stance. "In the name of Jupiter I call upon the forces...of thunder
and lightning to vanquish this evil...Jupiter...Thunder...D-Dragon," She
managed to use the last of her energy to send another blast at Malachite,
who repelled it off just like the last one.
	Andrew couldn't take much more of this.  Using what little streng-
th he had at the moment, he managed to rip through the rope that tied him
down and grabbed a nearby mirror.  Lita watched with a dazed expression
on her face as the energy came back at her.  Right when it was about to
hit her, Andrew jumped in the way with the mirror.  Sure enough, it re-
flected off and attacked Malachite at full force.  He was frozen by the
turn of events and simply stood there awestruck.  Andrew scooped Lita up
into his arms when the explosion occurred.
	"There," he comforted her. "It's all over now." He noticed that
her tiara had fallen off during the short battle.  However, just when he
was about to place it back on her forehead, he realized something.  This
girl looked exactly like Lita, he thought.  Could it be?  If this is
actually Lita, could the real reason why I saved her was because I had
feelings for her?  He tried to think this over as he carried her out of
the demolished room.

	***

	"Is this any way to treat a guest?" Chad yelled as he thrashed to
get loose.  Someone had tied him down to a bed.  Just then that someone
came near him.  It was Zoysite.  She slowly approached him and started
ruffling his hair.  He continuously jerked his head out of her way.  She
laughed at him. "What's so funny?"
	"My, aren't we the apprehensive type?  C'mon, can't you be just
a little playful?" She started poking at him.  Her smile vanished all of
a sudden. "Oh, I get it.  There's another girl involved, isn't there?"
	"Well, yeah, kind of," Chad squeaked.
	"She's a tramp, I bet.  Besides, I'm more the woman you'll ever
have," she smirked.  Suddenly the door banged wide open, and there stood
the other girl.  She stormed in.
	"Oh yeah, well, I'm twice the woman you'll ever be!" She shot back.
	"REI!" Chad shouted happily.
	"Huh, you recognize me?" Rei was shocked.  But I'm Sailor Mars
now, she thought.  Maybe he's in denial.
	"I take it then you're challenging me?" Zoysite hissed.
	"Why not?  I'm in a fighting mood," Rei agreed.
	"Very well!  CHERRY BLOSSOM MIND TRAP!" Zoysite hollered as she
aimed an array of flower petals at Rei, who was left unaware.  The petals
formed around her, and her eyes were forcefully shut. "As we speak, your
own feelings are turning against you!"
	"What are you talking about?" Rei moaned.  Then she found out.  A
strange scene was forming before her.  Someone was standing before her.
It was Tuxedo Mask. "Oh, Tuxedo Mask!  What's going on?" She tried to
reach him, but he knocked her backwards. "Huh?"
	"Go away, Sailor Mars!  I hate you!" With that, he tossed a rose
at her, and it stabbed her in the chest.  Just as she was about to keel
over, she heard something behind her.  It was the other Sailor Scouts!
	"Sailor Moon, help me!" Rei whined in agony. "T-Tuxedo M-Mask!
Did you see what he just did to me?"
	"Yeah, I saw the whole thing.  Glad he took my directions care-
fully," she snapped.
	"Y-You told him to do this?  But why?"
	"Isn't it obvious?  You're out of the Sailor Scouts!  You've
failed us one time too many!  We've had it!" They stormed off.
	Rei opened her eyes slowly. "The world is a cold and lonely place..."
a red aura formed around her.  Zoysite gasped.  No one had ever beaten her
mind trap.  She knew this for a fact because of the countless hours she
had spent using it on Malachite.  Rei lifted her head. "I call upon the
power of Mars..." the aura came together in her hand and formed a fiery
red ball. "MARS...AMBIENCE FIRE...INFLAME!" The fireball shot out at
Zoysite, who was still taken aghast.  It engulfed her in a huge flaming
inferno.  Chad fainted when the fireball shot right over him and hit
Zoysite.
	Rei was completely out of the trance when Zoysite was obliter-
ated.  She quickly untied Chad and lugged him out of the room.
	"I was hoping I would find Darien," she thought aloud. "but I
guess this is almost good enough." Little did she know that Chad had
heard this.  He managed a weak smile by the compliment.

	***

	"Aw, c'mon, kid," Neflite pleaded. "Ain't you just a little
frightened of me?" He shook Greg by the shoulders angrily.
	"Nah," Greg scoffed. "You see, I already know what's going to
happen.  As it seems, you won't lay a finger on me during the battle.
I'll manage to get out of this scott-free."
	"Battle?  What battle?"
	"Oh, it'll start right about..." Greg watched as a figure formed
in the doorway.  It was Ami. "...now."
	"Greg!" Ami shouted. "Are you alright?"
	"Oh, I'm fine, Ami."
	"Greg, please!  I'm Sailor Mercury now!"
	"Oh, sorr-"
	"Hey!  Are you the one I'm fighting?" Neflite jabbed his finger
in her face.
	"Yep, that's her," Greg reassured.
	"Huh?  A fight, eh?  Okay, I guess," Ami replied nonchalantly.
This seems so strange, she thought.  Almost as though this fight has
already been planned, bit by bit.
	"Okay, let's see here," Greg studied the scene from nearby.
"Neflite, you'll start with one of your ground-shaking things, then
you'll get him with your Bubble Blast, Ami.  Neflite, you'll get a
little fazed by this, but you won't be completely out, got it?  Then
you, Ami, will take this as the perfect opportunity to-"
	"Will you please shut-up!" Neflite barked. "Can't you see we're
trying to fight here?  Now let's see, what am I going to use on you?"
	"Weren't you listening?" Greg chastened. "Use one of your
ground-shaking thingies!"
	"Oh right."
	"Geez, this is taking forever!  MERCURY BUBBLES...BLAST!" Ami
shot out a foggy assortment of bubbles, temporarily blinding Neflite.
	"Hey!  That's not how it goes!" Greg yelled.
	"You cheated!  I'm supposed to hit first!" Neflite hollered.
"Listen to the kid, okay?"
	"Yeah, what he said!" Greg agreed. "Now then, as it seems,
Neflite is going to do something weird and this is going to harm you,
Ami.  But don't worry, 'cuz you'll then attack him with your Icebubble
Freeze, and he'll be a-"
	Neflite and Ami were pretty ticked off at this point.  Neflite
gave Ami the signal and she nodded.  They both walked over to Greg, who
was still talking.
	"Geez, you little punk!  Don't you ever shut-up!" Neflite made
a fist.
	"I thought you were cool at first with your ability to see into
the future, but for the past couple of days you've been irritating the
heck outta me!" Ami yelled.
	"But-"
	"Take him, Neflite." Ami motioned for him to beat Greg's brains
out. "Next time I fight, maybe you'll learn to shut-up, hmm?"

	***

	"Where am I?" Mina wondered as she stepped into a dark room.
It was obviously a large room, because her voice echoed throughout it.
Just when she was turning to leave, she heard the muffled sound of
someone squirming behind her.  It was Melvin.  He was hanging from a
long rope, stretching from who-know's-where, and was tied up tightly
and gagged with a handkerchief.  Mina walked up and took it from his
mouth. "What happened to you?"
	"I can't remember.  Some girl with long blond hair and funky
glasses tied me up and gagged me," Melvin replied.
	"Glasses?" Mina wondered.  She examined the handkerchief for
evidence.  It was bright red and two initials sewn into one corner
reading `S.V.' "Who's S.V?" She asked out loud.
	"That would be none other than I!" a voice yelled from high above.
Mina looked up.  The voice sounded all too familiar, almost like her own.
The person jumped down and landed on the opposite end of the plank she
was on.  A small light flickered on.  Mina was beyond horrified.  It was
herself!  Well, it wasn't exactly herself, but her in her early Sailor
form, as the famous Sailor V.
	"You..." Mina murmured. "You're me!"
	"Wrong!  I am my own self, not a cheesy blow-hard like you!  I
am Sailor V, sworn defender of the defenseless!  Sailor V is for..."
she narrowed her eyes at Mina and gave an evil grin. "...VICIOUSNESS!"
	"WHAT!?  That's not right!  It's for victory!" Mina corrected.
	"Not any more!" With that, Sailor V shot out a huge blast of
negative energy.  Mina was still shocked, and the blast hit her.  She
fell backwards.  Luckily, not much of her energy was drained, and she
got back up.
	"VENUS CRESCENT BEAM...SMASH!" the beam shot out and aimed for
Sailor V, but she dodged it.  Melvin managed to wriggle loose and decided
that he would join in the fight.  He got into a starting position and
lunged at Sailor V.  "Melvin!  Whaddya think you're doing?" Mina cried
out.
	"Don't you try and harm my love!" Melvin growled as he rammed
himself into Sailor V, knocking her over.
	"YOUR LOVE!?" Mina repeated.
	Melvin got back up to his feet and glared at the fallen Sailor
V.  At first he thought he was seeing things, but...?  Sailor V's long
hair and glasses were gone.  It was really Jedite in disguise!
	"Who'd have thunk?" Mina said as she stepped up closer. "Geez,
and he had a figure to match!  Ugh!"
	"You think just because your boyfriend's blown my cover that
it's all over?" Jedite got up and stared at them.
	"Look, he's not my boyfriend!"
	"Whatever," Jedite said.  A huge, yellow aura formed around
him. "However, I do want to thank you for the energy you sent to me
earlier.  Let this...be a token of my esteem," Heh, looks like those
lessons from Malachite are gonna come in handy after all, Jedite
thought. "HAH!  Take this!" He repelled her crescent beam smash. Mina
was lucky enough to dodge it, but Melvin, well, he wasn't as lucky.
He was flung backwards into a wall.
	"Leave him alone!" Mina yelled. "Here's what Sailor V really
stands for!  VENUS...METEOR...SHOWER!" She hurled the blast at Jedite,
who was no match for it.  He was defeated. "Sailor V is for VIRTUE!"
	"I...thought it was for victory," Jedite gasped.
	Mina felt that her last attack had really taken a beaten out
of herself.  With the little energy she had left she walked over to
Melvin's slumped body.  She slowly knelt down by his side, to see if
there were any signs of life.  Her energy was on its last string by
now, and all she could do now was fall over, coincidentally into his
lap.  The two lay there, with no idea of what was going on.

	***

	"Just answer me this," Darien asked as he sat in Beryl's pri-
vate quarters. "Why did you really choose me over the others?"
	"There's...something about you that made me want to choose,"
Beryl sighed. "Lord knows what, though.  Besides, you've got the cutest
little dimples."
	"Really?" Gee, Serena never complimented my dimples, Darien
thought.
	"Just think, soon we'll be King and Queen of Teenyweenyrini-
nkyo Island," Beryl said excitedly.
	"Wait a minute," Darien hadn't really considered this.  The
thought about being King was one thing, but if it meant marrying some-
thing more hideous than a wrinkled old Amazon ghoul, then forget it!
No way was he going through with it!
	"Something the matter?"
	"Uh, no, not really.  Say, just to make sure, this isn't all a
big joke, is it?"
	"Goodness no!  This is the real thing!" Beryl took a white gown
from her boudoir and modeled it for Darien. "What do think?  Does it
bring out my eyes?"
	"Heck would I know.  What color are your eyes anyway?"
	"They're-" Before Beryl could finish, they both heard a loud
crash in the foyer.  It was none other than Serena.  Darien was relieved.
"Who's there?"
	"Darien?" Serena quivered as she slowly made her way into the
room.  She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw Beryl. "YOU!  At last
we meet again!"
	"Who are you?" Beryl never recalled meeting her.
	"You're going down, you twisted, low-down, boy-friend-napping,
poor excuse for a villain in a fanfic, hideous, malformed, pulsating-"
	"Get to the point, Serena!" Darien interrupted.
	"Ugly wench!" Serena completed. "How dare you take my boy-
friend!  You're moondust!" She pulled out one of her many weapons.
	"Oh, so you're the old ball-and-chain," Beryl said. "I suppose
this means that you'll want him back, right?"
	"It would be nice," Serena replied weakly.
	"WRONG!  After searching for years for the perfect man I'm not
about to give up on this one!" Beryl hissed.
	"Hmm, guess talking to her won't get anything accomplished.  I
was afraid to use this on you, but I guess I have no choice," Serena
thought aloud.  She yanked out her Crescent Moon Wand. "COSMIC MOON
POWER!" A strong beam propelled at Beryl, but she lucklessly dodged it.
	"Now's my turn!" Beryl made a huge ball of energy and hurled
it at Serena.  Serena dodged it, but at the same time was blinded by the
bright flash.  Beryl used this time to snatch a dumbfounded Darien and
carry him off.  She opened a set of doors and ran through them.  Once
inside she awaited the arrival of one of her railcarts so she could jump
in and get away.  Serena managed to regain her sight right when the doors
were starting to close.
	"Darien!" She cried. "Wait for me!"

	***

	"That stupid Artemis," Luna muttered as she wondered down the
halls. "Always getting into some sort of trouble.  I don't know why I
even bother to rescue him."  She stopped walking and peeked into one
room in particular.  She could make out the two figures; one was large
and cumbersome, the other was small and mercurial.  Curious, she walked
in for a closer look.  As she grew closer, she knew who it was.  The
small one was Artemis, and the poor thing was squirming for his dear
life.  The large one was Hercules, a normally squatty cat, but unfor-
tunately by the power of the seven rainbow crystals, he turned into a
monstrous creature.
	"TAKE YOUR PAWS OFF HIM THIS INSTANT!" Luna threatened.  She
raised a claw in anger.
	"Luna!  You do care for me after all!" Artemis cried out
happily.
	"Yeah right, I'm only doing this because if you wind up missing,
I'll be the first suspect as to what's happened to you," Luna explained
shrewdly.
	Hercules stomped over closer to Luna, Artemis in hand.  Luna
didn't know what she could do, there was no way she could totally defeat
him alone, but as long as she could distract him for a while.  Without
even thinking, she lunged at Hercules and scratched him across the face.
She managed to dig her claws deep enough into him to hit blood, and he
dropped Artemis to cover up the huge scar.  Artemis ran out of the way,
Luna at his heels.  The two didn't stop running until they reached the
end of the hall.
	"Luna, you saved me," Artemis panted. "Why?"
	"I already told you, Artemis," Luna remarked.
	"Yeah, but I bet there's a much deeper reason than that," Artemis
said as he nuzzled against Luna.  POW!  Luna smacked him with her paw.
"What was that for?"
	"I guess you'll never know," Luna snickered and waltzed off.

	***

	Serena sprinted across the room like lightning to make it through
the doors before they closed.  Once inside she jumped into an empty rail-
cart and started sailing down the track, hoping catch up with Beryl.  The
track was incredibly dangerous, and winded along a trail that was right
at the edge of a huge hole.  If for some reason Serena was to fall out
of the cart, who knew what would become of her.  It was only a matter of
time before she finally caught up with Beryl.
	"It's her again!" Beryl was flustered.  She picked up a yellow
cone from the corner of her cart and plopped it down on the track.
"This'll stop her for sure!"
	"Oh no!" Serena shrieked when she saw the cone.  She covered
her eyes as the cart ran into it and flung her forward.  She opened her
eyes right when she was careening for Beryl's cart.  Unfortunately she
was off by a few inches and instead of hoping that she land in the cart
she would fall into the hole. Darien reached out her arms to try and
catch her.
	"Serena, hang on!" he cried.  He caught her arms and tried to
pull her in.
	"Oh no you don't!" Beryl used her staff to whack him on the hands.
The hit made Darien jerk his hands back suddenly.  At the same time he let
go of Serena.  Instead of falling she managed to grab on.  Her grip wasn't
the greatest because the cart was going at least 50 mph.  Beryl tried to
hit her hands too.
	"The same thing doesn't work twice, Beryl!" Serena yelled as she
held on for dear life.  She managed to whip out her Moon Sceptre, and aim
it at Beryl. "MOON...SCEPTRE...ELIMI-"
	"Nice try, brat!" Beryl smacked it out of her hands.  Darien
caught it so it wouldn't fly away. "I'd let go now if I were you." ZING!
A rose flew in and stopped Beryl from delivering her attack.
	"What was that for?" Serena and Beryl yelled at the same time.
	"Sorry, force of habit," Darien apologized. "Besides, Beryl,
you shouldn't mess with someone more powerful than yourself."
	"Who are you to talk?" Beryl snapped.
	"Well, actually, she's got the upper hand, now, Darien," Serena
gritted her teeth. "I'm just trying to hang on, see?"
	Beryl glared at Darien. "You'll get what's coming to you soon
enough.  Now as for you," she narrowed her eyes at Serena. "Good-bye!"
she managed to knock Serena off once and for all.
	Serena at first felt like she was suspended in air, then she
felt the falling feeling.  She began to gain speed as she fell.  Darien
noticed this immediately and knew he had to act fast.  He saw that up
ahead the yellow cone was coming up again.  All this time they had been
going in a circle!
	"Hey, Beryl, it's been fun, but I gotta jet," he leaped out of
the cart. "I'd hit the brakes if I were you." He pointed to cone.
	"What the-I don't have any brakes!" Beryl replied.  The she
saw what he meant. "OH NOOOOOOO!" She was knocked clean into the wall.

	***

	"HELP!" Serena cried as she continued to fall at fast speed.
There didn't seem to be an end. "I'm gonna fall forever!"
	"No you won't," a voice said from beside her.  Darien grabbed
her by the waist and made her hold on tightly. "I know there's a bottom,
but it's covered with a spring that'll turn you into a man permanently
if you fall in."
	"What's so bad about that?" Serena asked. "It won't harm you."
	"Um, Serena, you're a girl, and if you fell...well, let's just
say I wouldn't get near you," Darien explained in a way she would
understand.
	"Then we've got to destroy it, right?  But none of my powers'll
stop it?  What can I do?"
	"You have an inner energy source.  It can give you great power,
but once it's used up, it's like having your energy drained.  You ob-
viously know what that feels like," Darien said.
	"How do I get to it?"
	"Concentrate."
	Serena closed her eyes.  It was all beginning to surface now.
A bright pink aura formed around her.  Just like what had happened to
Rei, it all came together in her hands, and formed a powerful sphere.
She wrapped her hands around it, and then suddenly, she pushed it out,
and yelled, "MOON AMBIENCE POWER!!"
	The blast caused a mighty explosion that sent both of them
flying sky high.  They flew out of the roof of the fortress and landed
in some trees next to it.  The branches were too weak for them and
they fell on the ground immediately.  It was all over.

	***

	As soon as Serena landed on the ground she transformed back from
Sailor Moon.  She quickly got to her feet and rushed over to Darien's side.
	"Darien?" She cried out. "Are you alright?"
	"Yeah, I'm fine," Darien responded.
	The two then heard voices from the demolished fortress.  Some
people started running out.  The first two were Rei and Chad.  Chad had
finally regained his strength and wasn't being dragged around by Rei
anymore.  Greg, on the other hand, had had the brains beat out of him,
just like Ami told Neflite to do so.  Ami was still really steamed at
him, and decided to call their so-called "relationship" quits.  Andrew
was still carrying Lita in his arms, although she was now starting to
come to.  He had decided that since his actual girlfriend Rita was still
in Africa, that going with Lita for a while wouldn't be that bad.
Finally, Artemis sauntered out, with a teasing Luna at his heels.
	"That was some adventure," Luna replied as she caught her
breath.
	"With a happy ending," Darien added as he gave Serena a small
kiss on the cheek.  Serena was surprised to see that Rei wasn't jealous
at all.
	"Rei?  What's with you?  Why aren't you ticked at me for getting
kissed?" Serena asked.
	"Well, normally I would be, but I think I've finally gotten over
Darien.  Chad here, has tried everything to get me to like him, but I
always ignored him.  Guess it's about time I gave him a chance," Rei said
as she smiled at Chad.
	"This just makes me wanna sing!" Chad said happily.
	"N-no, that's quite alright, Chad," Rei stopped him before he could
start.
	"Well, I'm happy that you've got someone now, Rei, although I can't
say the same for myself," Ami grumbled as she pointed to Greg's body. "We
just weren't made for each other."
	Lita finally came back to complete consciousness and was shocked
to find herself in Andrew's arms. "Andrew!  What happened?  Why am I-how
did this-what am I-what's going-"
	"It's alright, Lita," Andrew said as he put her down.
	"It is?  But what about the man who kidnapped you?"
	"I, uh, defeated him."
	"But I-you did-MY HERO!" She wrapped her arms around him tightly.
	"What have I done?" Andrew sighed.
	"Well, I guess we're all here now," Serena placed her hands on
her hips.
	"Not everyone.  Where are Mina and Melvin?" Artemis asked.
	"Right here!" Mina hollered as she and Melvin emerged from the
fortress, hand in hand.
	"Ew, you're touching him?" Serena wrinkled her nose in disgust.
	"It's not like he has cooties, Serena," Mina replied. "I admit,
he's different, but...I like different.  But don't get me wrong, it's
not like we're a couple or anything, we're just friends."
	"She's right," Melvin replied.
	"Any chance of going any deeper?" Lita wondered.
	"Well..." Mina trailed off.
	"Looks like we're stuck on this island now," Darien stared out
at the ocean.
	"Well, it is a floating island," Ami said. "We'll hit the main-
land soon enough."
	"Look!" Serena pointed at something heading their way. "It's...a
helicopter!  We're saved!" Sure enough, the helicopter landed before them.
The door swung open and out ran Molly. "Molly!  What are you doing
here?"
	"I heard about what happened, and I knew I had to come back right
away," Molly said.
	"Finally, a chance to go home and forget about all of this,"
Andrew moaned as he climbed into the helicopter.  Lita hit him in the
arm. "Well, not everything."
	"That's better."


	"Say, Melvin, who's the girl?" Molly said as she approached him
and Mina.
	"She's my friend," Melvin replied quickly.
	"Good.  For a moment there I thought you had forgotten about
us," Molly said snootily.
	"Us?" Mina repeated.  She narrowed her eyes at Melvin. "You nev-
er mentioned another girl to me!"
	"I...forgot?"
	"Forgot, huh?" Molly made a fist and aimed it at Melvin.  Mina
jumped in the way.
	"Don't you lay a finger on him!" She yelled.
	"I thought you two were just friends," Molly snapped.
	"So?  That doesn't give you any right to slug him!"
	"You stay out of this, ya fool!"
	"A fool, am I?"
	"You're also an airheaded blonde!"
	"Tramp!"
	"Bimbo!"
	"Concubine!"
	"Your mother!"
	"Girls!  I cannot have you fight over me like this!" Melvin tried
to intervene, but it was no use.  The cat-fight had already begun. "Of
course, I'm not stopping you."
	"Putz!"
	"Cheap-skate!"
	"Whore!"
	"Jezebel!"
	"Ah, a hunk's work is never done," Melvin sighed.
	"CAN IT, MELVIN!" the yelled in unison.


	THE END
	And now for something...completely different.

	characters copyright 1995, Naoko Takeuchi/Toei Animation
	all names are english spelled, except for Ami and Rei, which are
the japanese spellings.
	written by Jamie Godley
	copyright 1996, the We Hate Akane Unanimous(
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