Breaking news on the Latin popstar, Shakira. Reporters went to follow Shakira off stage for a backstage interview after a concert of hers, and they found that her image dissolved away into that of a small mexican bred canine!
With furthar investigation, it has been discovered that this is how Shakira recieved her record deal. When she was young, and still a pup, she ran away from the well known "Dogs Of Christmas" A series of canine "singers" who bark out christmas carols. When she found her way to New York City, she drank a puddle of what she thought was just a mudd puddple of regular city gasoline filled, polluted homeless man's urine. To her surprise, it was not urine at all, it was the same green "ooze" in which the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (pictured below) drank when they morphed into their all powerful superheros of today.
Because of this intergalactic liquid she drank, she turned into a beautiful woman with an unbelievable Latin singing voice, for the last person who came into contact with this "ooze" was no other than, Gloria Estefan! As you know already, Gloria was the result of a dirty street pigeon mixed with that "ooze." The creation of this liquid was the result of one of Elizabeth Taylors perfumes gone bad.
Why does Shakira not turn into a dog on stage you ask? Well, much like Cindarella, Shakira remains a woman untill the clock strikes midnight. There is currently research going on trying to help Shakira remain human for all the rest of her life. All the money for AIDS, Cancer, and Biochemical war research has been put into the "Help Save The Bitch Foundation" to help Shakira out. You can send your donations to...
Janet Reno
Judicial Court Street
po Box 666
