"'Excuse me?" I scratch my head. "Did you say 'Satanic Communists?' What's next, 'Christian Atheists'?"

That's right folks. There are some "Satanists" that also now claim to support communism. Some might think "Well, I don't see why not." But here's the deal: I can point out several things about communism that are blatantly anti-Satanic. This essay is to stress these points, because there are some who just don't seem to get it.

Through my years of self-education in sociology and politics, I've come to formulate a pretty clear view on what motivates people and how government works. For those of you who may not be familiar with communism, let me give a brief overview, and an explanation for why it is anti-Satanic.

The basic concept of communism is that the government provides equal employment, health care, and income for all residents of the country. You are guaranteed a job, a house and everything else that is necessary for existence. However, the price you pay for this is your freedom to excel and gain merit through productivity. Communism annihilates the opportunity to choose your profession. This in turn also voids the opportunity of making a larger income. In essence, communism incubates mass conformity and disallows elite individuals to rise to the top through merit.

To go into further detail, if we take a look at Marxist theory (what communism is based upon), we can see many reasons why the ethics of this philosophy simply do not fit into Satanic logic. In Marxism theory, in a capitalist society such as America, a laborer at a factory takes raw material and makes it into something more valuable than the original raw material. However, instead of being paid the surplus or added value that the labor creates, they are only paid a "reproduction" wage, i.e., enough to live off of so they can come back the next day, and the owner of the factory gets the majority of the profits. This is considered a gross injustice in Marxist theory.

What would a Satanist do? Throw in the towel and get an education so they could be the factory owner, or go onto something even more fulfilling. "Death to the weakling, wealth to the strong" rings true in this situation, as all humans have the capability of willing themselves to be strong. There is no need to take pity on the factory worker, since in a capitalist society, all members have the opportunity to gain education and skills through more intelligent means of constructing their lives.

To fully reap the benefits and enjoyment of life, a Satanist values their freedom to advance if they so wish through intelligent means, willpower, and the goal to be successful in whatever they so chose to do. They do not need a government that attempts to provide it for them, nor a political structure that takes pity on less than skilled individuals.

It is obvious that this type of economic, social, and political structure is in direct conflict with Satanic logic and philosophy. People who call themselves communists often share common ideas such as a strong dislike of the upper class, a desire to enforce equal standards, and to maintain "strength for the community." This is obviously a form of herd mentality, and while considered valiant by a large percentage of society, is also very much in conflict with Satanic viewpoints. It attempts to defy the Law of the Jungle, and furthermore, any true Satanist would rather give his or her right arm than give up the freedom to be successful. Where communism falls short is in the fact that a measure of standard mediocrity for the masses has to take place in order for there to be enough wealth to go around. This in turn spreads the layer thin, forcing people to be in the same shithole as the next sucker, regardless if they're ten times more responsible, motivated and competent.

One of the main reasons why some people have attempted tagging Satanism on to communist belief systems is because one of their main motivational factors is rebellion against capitalist government and a desire for mass social revolution. The "S" word is a handy thing because they feel it adds to the social upheaval they're trying to stir up. Marxist theory teaches that through change created by the common people banning together, society could reach some sort of utopia through the "thesis + antithesis = synthesis," theory. Satanism clearly isn't a philosophy formulated to serve the need for social revolution by "banning together," but one that is instead centered on the self. True Satanists don't feel the need to band together with any community, nor do they truly care for the "greater good of society," especially if it is not only going to fail to effect them, but in fact inhibit them. Satanists are elite individuals, not social revolutionaries bent on making a utopia for anyone else but themselves. But it is easy to see why the term Satanism would be appealing to individuals who are interested in social revolution (or, in some cases, shit-disturbing).

In conclusion, you can safely assume that anyone who claims to be a true communist is certainly not a Satanist. Anyone who has some knowledge of Dr. LaVey's literature and definition of Satanism knows that the basic philosophy of communism is contradictory to Satanic tenets. Yet, there are still groups and individuals that try to intertwine the two, and will often resort to backpedaling to try and make it sound legitimate. However, I have seen several documents written by advocates of this new attempt at making a Satanic hybrid, that at best come off as warping Satanic philosophy, at worst sounding positively stupid. Most true Satanists would be able to recognize the obvious flaws in these attempts, but with the increasing plethora of proposed ideas that blur the lines of Satanic philosophy, this was enough incentive to write a communiqué on it. It never ceases to amaze me how far people will go to keep the "S" word in their definition of worldview, even after it has long since left the boundaries of what defines it.