| The interlectual amonst you will have worked out who is in this fight... |
| Michelangelo Vs Raphael (semi final two) |
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| Ahh, the Stoner Vs the Badass. I think I know who�s gonna win this one. It�s by no means a certainty but I have an inkling. Who knows Mikey could have gone cold turkey in the build up, which cause result in him being sharper, quicker and more focused. Raphael is comfortable favourite for this match and I can assure you there will be none of that sissy �honour� bullshit when these two square up. This is man on man, no messing about, two warriors fighting to the death. I don�t think they exactly like each other, they have nothing in common, Michelangelo likes computer games, Raphael like beating people up, Mikey likes surfing, Raphael likes�..beating people up. Yep, this should be some match up. Round One : My theories about Mikey sobering up are going straight out of the window. He staggers out, blatantly mashed off his face on god knows what. He falls over twice before the fight even begins. I can only assume that he turned up in this state to dull the pain of his beatings, in retrospect�.good move. Raphael wastes no time and charges over to Mikey with what can only be described as a flying head butt manoeuvre. Mikey hits the deck and appears to be out for the count, but in all fairness, if Raphael would have breathed too heavily on Mikey he would have dropped. Raphael continues to kick the living shit out of Mikey...It�s just not funny anymore�.well�actually it is. Mikey is now curled up like a small stoned puppy, this relentless kicking doesn�t stop until Raphael pulls Mikey to his feet, however this vertical position is short-lived as Raphael then delivers a Roundhouse kick to the cranium. �Cow-a-bunga�. Raphael wins. Round Two : Mikey should adopt a defensive style�.but he doesn�t. This mammoth ass kicking starts again from where it left off. Raphael was now doin it for the crowd (me) and started showing off. He started with an eye poke to Mikey. On a tangent�..why did the turtles where the mask things over their eyes? I know most superheroes wear masks, Spiderman, Batman and Superman all wore masks because they all had alter egos, being a superhero was something they did part time. For the Turtles it was different, they were superheroes all the time, so what is with the masks? It�s not like Donatello would say �Hey guys do you mind if we wear masks, I don�t want the guys at work to know what I do in my spare time��.back to the fight. Raphael dished out more of a beating�less a fight, more butchery, it was everything to brothers fighting should be. I eventually rang the bell because Mikey passed out. Round Three : There shouldn�t have really been a round three, Raphael won two rounds (best of three), but for some reason Raphael insisted. He was really show boating this round, mocking Mikey with lines like �Splinter has found your stash and you�re in big trouble� or calling his name from behind a wall. You or me would say �Not to worry, it�s simply someone calling my name from behind a wall� but remember that Mikey was completely mullered on God knows what, so he was scared shittless. He thought it was a ghost or something. He just started shaking with occasional tears falling down his little green face. That was until Raphael pimp slapped him for being a bitch. Then�.Raphael did the unthinkable�he put Mikey on his back. Not much of move idiots would think, they�d say ��and what? Why doesn�t he just get up?� He�s a fuckin turtle, he has a shell. He just lay there struggling to no avail, ah the irony. Raphael then added insult to injury as he began to spin Mikey, getting faster and faster...genius. He eventually came to a halt, but the fact that Michelangelo was nauseous, petrified and shaking wasn�t enough for the badass in red. No, he capped it all by pulling Michelangelo�s shell up, giving him a wedgie of titanic proportions. Raphael goes through. Now I know certain people may complain (vegetarians, Europeans, scum) about who I have said would win, so I�m gonna be diplomatic about the final, I�ve set up a poll. All you have to do is click on the one you think would win and the one with the most votes will be crowned winner�unless you goons pick Leonardo, then I�ll override your ass, hey it�s my site, I�ll do what the hell I want. |
